You Know I'm Chat Thread

[ovary]

okay i flipped it. anyway.

[ovary]

so here's an articicile about sleep training: https://www.thecut.com/2022/09/sleep...te-tiktok.html

[ovary]

i had a dream last night i had a new office mate and she was blonde and beautiful and she would like to recline and finger herself while she sold me gossip and maybe that's all i've got for tonight: thoughts? questions?

[ilikeplanets]

Sleep training is a load of crap

[ovary]

nuff said

[Disco King]

I think there's something to it. By using complex machine-learning algorithms and a vast data set, computer scientists have been able to train their computers to sleep on command.

[vixnix]

When sleep training works it can be great, but when it doesn’t work it is so miserable for everyone involved and basically doesn’t end until the child is old enough to reason with, so maybe around 3. That’s a pretty long time to listen to all night crying and screaming

[ilikeplanets]

Anything that doesn't work for 3 years until you can try something else is crap

[topleybird]

Look, if Paul Reiser and Helen Hunt could do it in one continuous 22-minute take, I don't see what the fuck you're all struggling with

[ilikeplanets]

Who's struggling? When the kids wake up, I put on TV and give them candy so I can go back to sleep. Even the baby.

[vixnix]

Something I’m not sure about is when people says “she’s going to be a big sister soon” about their cat, and then they get a dog

[smashingjj]

I'm heartbroken. I feel anguish beyond all compare. My mind, soul and body are nothing but empty shells, I am but an echo of my former self. My life and all its purpose, meaning and joy have been robbed, and I fear my will to live shall never return. Words are but squiggles that will never have the power to portray how truly melancholy I am. When I heard the news, it's as if all the colour was looted from my world. All passion and happiness melted before my very eyes. Since her majesty's death, I only see black and white, pain and misery, hopelessness and suffering.
Oh, my queen. My heart and the heart of the nation longs for you. We grieve for you. You were our rock, our foundation. I deeply fear for the outcome of our planet now that you are not here to guide us with your goddess-like wisdom. The nation is inconsolable, it weeps for our queen.

[slunken]

Originally Posted by redbreegull

did you miss the thread where I told everyone about my 7 girlfriends

.

[Joey Goldberg]

lol.... smashingj


STOPPPPPP joking


pls...

[slunken]

So here is my crazy over the top date.

It started by picking her up at 8am. I was dressed as a pirate. Rang the door bell and her father open the door; he was a real good sport with me wearing the pirate outfit. Briana smiled when she saw me all dressed up. I then gave her 6 necklaces made of seashells for her to wear on our island adventure. I took her to my “black pearl” and we “sailed away” to our 1st island. But before we sailed away I made sure to get out of that pirate get up.

I had breakfast waiting for her in the car (fruit, orange juice & banana bread from Starbucks). Along w/ an itinerary of our date, telling her how far things were and what time we were suppose to get there by. And the itinerary was actually extremely accurate. I also made her a CD as I always do for my dates. I called the CD “200 Miles (around the world)”; Google maps had calculated 200 miles to be how far we would travel for our date.

The 1st place we stopped at was Treasure Island; this is a small artificial island located in the San Francisco Bay (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treasure_Island,_CA) where we walked around and took some pictures. We actually found this beautiful gazebo and took a picture there


We then went back to my car where I put down the top and I taught her how to drive my car which is a manual stick shift. She did REALLY well.

[SuckSuckStyle]

Originally Posted by slunken

So here is my crazy over the top date.

It started by picking her up at 8am. I was dressed as a pirate. Rang the door bell and her father open the door; he was a real good sport with me wearing the pirate outfit. Briana smiled when she saw me all dressed up. I then gave her 6 necklaces made of seashells for her to wear on our island adventure. I took her to my “black pearl” and we “sailed away” to our 1st island. But before we sailed away I made sure to get out of that pirate get up.

I had breakfast waiting for her in the car (fruit, orange juice & banana bread from Starbucks). Along w/ an itinerary of our date, telling her how far things were and what time we were suppose to get there by. And the itinerary was actually extremely accurate. I also made her a CD as I always do for my dates. I called the CD “200 Miles (around the world)”; Google maps had calculated 200 miles to be how far we would travel for our date.

The 1st place we stopped at was Treasure Island; this is a small artificial island located in the San Francisco Bay (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Treasure_Island,_CA) where we walked around and took some pictures. We actually found this beautiful gazebo and took a picture there


We then went back to my car where I put down the top and I taught her how to drive my car which is a manual stick shift. She did REALLY well.

But what about the other islands?

Do you drive a Miata?

[ilikeplanets]

Kid has been at kindergarten for a week and we're already both sick. Hoping somehow the baby doesn't also get sick. This is gonna be a LONG cold and flu season. Ugh.

[vixnix]

One good thing about your life being in the toilet is the sense of camaraderie you feel with all the other people who have been in the same place, some of whom are heroes

[vixnix]

Like Conan O’Brien

[vixnix]

And Warren Zevon

[vixnix]

Maybe I should have started another thread

[vixnix]

Originally Posted by ilikeplanets

Kid has been at kindergarten for a week and we're already both sick. Hoping somehow the baby doesn't also get sick. This is gonna be a LONG cold and flu season. Ugh.

Hope you are both feeling better and the baby didn’t get it….

[yo soy el mejor]

i say just keep wearing masks. they protect from more than covid.

but i s'pose you can't depend on the other kids and parents to do the same, so really you're just protecting them but no one is protecting you. oy vey. forget it!

[ilikeplanets]

She would literally be the only student in the entire school with one, since the mandate was dropped. So there's no point. They're allowed at school with most symptoms, except a fever and vomiting/diarrhea, so I'm sure this is only the first of many. I'm wearing my mask at home when sick, hoping that will maybe help. I don't think it's a battle I can win, though. We're not terribly ill, but I'm trying to spare my 3 month old from having a cold.

[ilikeplanets]

I was more commenting on the extreme rapid pace with which she caught something. Literally immediately. We haven't been sick in years due to masks and isolation, so I forgot how fun this is.

[ovary]

i had a chin pimple, a deep one. i nursed it all day at work, feeling its tender itchy edges with the tips of my fingers, dreaming of a later proper pop post-shower, warm and naked in my steaming bathroom. but then suddenly stopped at a red light on the way home a wave of desire broke over me. i flipped down the vizor and admired my bump in the mirror, shiny and red. no whitehead was visible, but i knew a flooding cavern lurked beneath, pressurized and ready. my hands flew to my chin and i squeezed once: pain! we were close. a deep breath and i squeezed again, harder this time, and a pert explosion ripped through the vehicle. "uuoohhhhhgggh," i rumbled, exhausted, shaking as the light turned green. disoriented, i moved through the intersection, shivering, moaning, my gaping chin dribbling in the rearview. "whew," i sighed, merging onto the interstate as my spine twisted one final quiver. "i will remember this," i whispered.

[yo soy el mejor]

sad

[SuckSuckStyle]

There’s a bed/mattress mega-store in my hometown called “Sleep Train”

They invested in one of the concert/sports venues and it was renamed Sleep Train Amphitheatre.

I’d say you should bring your babies there but they tore it down a few weeks ago to build some ticky tack housing.

I saw the pumpkins there in 96.

AND SESAME STREET LIVE IN 87!

[slunken]

Originally Posted by SuckSuckStyle

There’s a bed/mattress mega-store in my hometown called “Sleep Train”

They invested in one of the concert/sports venues and it was renamed Sleep Train Amphitheatre.!

incredible

there's an amphitheater near me that just renamed itself "MEGACORP PAVILION"

straight out of Robocop

[slunken]

god i hope sleep train licensed the quad city dj's song "c'mon ride it (the train)" for their commercials