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Old 10-09-2007, 01:48 AM   #1
Tchocky
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Arrow Definitive Review of In Rainbows

It begins with the sound of artificial handclaps, which says it all. "You used to be alright. What happened?" asks the cyborg master of ceremonies, smugly rubbing a bloated steel stomach fat with years of hardware updates and chewed up babies. The listener asks the same question. Yes, this is the new Radiohead album. After years of waiting Marvin came.

The 'experimental' beat of 15 Step is like Yorke jabbing you in the forehead with his finger, repeatedly. His bandmates have no choice but to jabber along with a concoction of baffling chirps, thuds and whistles. When once Jonny Greenwood thrilled with furious riffage, now he strums along like he's in love with a banjo. Then at the 'climax' of this 'song' he seemingly boils a kettle and nods along like it's music. It's sad to hear but after hearing his boring (and racist) cod-reggae solo album I suppose this shouldn't be a surprise.

Bodysnatchers follows and indeed the soul is somewhere else entirely. A bland motorway of guitar shenanigans unfolds before randomly stopping before it really started. All his fans want is the thrilling guitar assault of The Bends, Thom knows this, and this feels like his half-blooded fuck you... The full-blooded insult is next. Patient fans know that the song Big Ideas, with its incredible organ and glockenspiel arrangement, should have been the highlight of the fourth record that was sadly sidetracked by nervous breakdowns and electronic fetishism. But now, pointlessly retitled as Nude, it emerges as a shadow of its former self: Ethereal textures substituted with a minimal bass that apes black culture, and choruses replaced by improvised falsetto screeching. I cried when I heard Nude but not because I empathise with Thom's suicidal nihilism... I mourn the gutting of a song I once loved.

Ironically the next song, Weird Fishes/Arpeggi (what?) rips off Radiohead fan favourite Let Down. It pains me to think of such a fine song as that being associated with such a terrible album as this. Arpeggi mimics an emotional epiphany before giving away to something called All I Need, a retread of the very much not fan favourite, Amnesiac's Treefingers. Skipping quickly I find that track 6, 'Faust Arp' (what?) is not a track at all, but a few seconds of baffling silence. Perhaps it was too embarrassed to show its face?

Oh well, at least we're on the back half now. A Thom Yorke solo acoustic recording, with psuedo-live clapping at the end and talking throughout, Reckoner is another slap in the face given how long fans have waited for a follow up to the electronica of 2003's George Bush Sucks, sorry i mean Hail To The Thief. At least, one thinks, they might have made the effort to provide passable sound quality to these sketches? But no. Shockingly the whole album sounds no better than a bootleg of live performances, dull and tinny throughout... but Reckoner is the worst offender.

Next song House Of Cards I can't recall at all so by default it has my vote as best 'song' on the album. While evidently not memorable in any shape or form at least it hasn't caused noticeable trauma or obscured my quality of life. Which sadly can't be said of next song Jigsaw Falling Into Place, seeing as it's a brazen repeat of earlier atrocity Bodysnatchers, albeit with added echoey vocals... doubtless intended to convey the vague distress of modern life, but in fact more like a theoretical soundtrack to a small child falling down a well. What pretentious garbage.

Phew, it's almost over... Closer Videotape takes the chord sequence from boring HTTF track Sail To The Moon and adds lengthy electronic manipulation to the end, an unresolved sour note to part on. It sounds more like an opener than anything. On the bright side it promises Thom Yorke's forthcoming retirement from the music scene (he admits he "can't tell us face to face"), good news for fans who don't wish the legacy of the first three Radiohead albums to be further tarnished.

That's it. It's been a mercifully short 35 minutes but still over 10 years since Thom Yorke wrote one goddamn song worth a goddamning damn. Tellingly all of the hype around this album has been around the idea that fans pay what 'they thinks it's worth', and not the content itself. Personally I'd have to be paid to listen to the mess that is In Rainbows again. Thanks to www.nme.com for providing a stream of the record anyway.

0/10
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are you guys having a who is a bigger dweeb pissing contest
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you're saying humans were engineered by aliens to mine gold to power their ships. You aren't this fucking stupid are you???

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 02:02 AM   #2
Shapan
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man i hadnt visited moritigi tempo in forever

kids were brought in to clap on 15 step, i think the live versions of all the songs minus faust arp clock over 40 mins as it is. im sure it was a joke but i cant find the humor anywhere.

haha thom's cod-reggae solo album

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 02:09 AM   #3
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i hope that's not true about nude


otherwise
lol

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 04:40 AM   #4
Tchocky
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shapan
haha jonny's cod-reggae solo album
Fixed.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 04:48 AM   #5
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"goddamn song worth a goddamning damn"

lol

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 04:53 AM   #6
ryan patrick
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what is this real

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 04:53 AM   #7
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where did this guy here the album link?

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 04:59 AM   #8
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did you read the article?

Thanks to www.nme.com for providing a stream of the record anyway.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 05:10 AM   #9
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link to nme.com please?

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 05:13 AM   #10
Kahlo
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www.nme.com

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 09:50 AM   #11
Mouths of Babes
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I'm missing the humor. What's with everyone doing the "I HAVE THE ALBUM, LOLZ" hoax and not anyone being any good at it?

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 01:50 PM   #12
Shapan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tchocky
Fixed.
wasnt that just a compilation anyways

are you actually buying this?

if this wouldve been on nme when this review was done, which was quite some time ago, it wouldve been leaked all over the net.

its a joke. id laugh that you'd be so gullible but you've had that radiohead avatar forever so if you were influenced by some review id feel bad if it would taint when you actually got the album.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 03:09 PM   #13
Tchocky
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Like, get a grip dude.

You want to know what's actually bothering me about the new album? The fact that I pre-ordered the discbox and still haven't gotten a download key.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 03:25 PM   #14
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i just received the following email from them (28min ago), and i also got the discbox:

THANK YOU FOR ORDERING IN RAINBOWS. THIS IS AN UPDATE.

YOUR UNIQUE ACTIVATION CODE(S) WILL BE SENT OUT TOMORROW MORNING (UK TIME).
THIS WILL TAKE YOU STRAIGHT TO THE DOWNLOAD AREA.

HERE IS SOME INFORMATION ABOUT THE DOWNLOAD:

THE ALBUM WILL COME AS A 48.4MB ZIP FILE CONTAINING 10 X 160KBPS DRM FREE MP3s.


 
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Old 10-09-2007, 04:03 PM   #15
Mouths of Babes
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tchocky
Like, get a grip dude.

You want to know what's actually bothering me about the new album? The fact that I pre-ordered the discbox and still haven't gotten a download key.
That's bothering you? Did you bother to read ANYTHING they said on the site or on confirmation pages/email -- or have you only spent your time writing and digging for fake reviews? No one received a download code yet. No one will receive a download email for many hours yet. Like, get a grip dude.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 04:22 PM   #16
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if that was an actual review, i'd give the album a 8/10 right away

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 05:11 PM   #17
Shapan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tchocky
Like, get a grip dude.

You want to know what's actually bothering me about the new album? The fact that I pre-ordered the discbox and still haven't gotten a download key.
complain when there's something to substantial to complain about. not because the band isnt following your timetable to send you a code to an album you can't download yet.

according to xfm, who are going to be playing in rainbows tomorrow at noon, the album will be 42 mins and 39 seconds.

Last edited by Shapan : 10-09-2007 at 05:30 PM.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 05:12 PM   #18
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Radiohead

 
Old 10-09-2007, 05:38 PM   #19
monkeyfritters
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reckoner isnt acoustic and never will be.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 05:40 PM   #20
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after listening to thier last few albums this review seems believable.

I hope Radiohead can do what SP has not and come back with a bang of sorts.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 05:41 PM   #21
Shapan
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Quote:
Originally Posted by monkeyfritters
reckoner isnt acoustic and never will be.
have you heard the gimme french fries acoustic version

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 05:47 PM   #22
monkeyfritters
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no?

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 05:51 PM   #23
Shapan
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reckoner acoustic:
http://www.sendspace.com/file/ygbkxf

i prefer PA PA PA

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 05:54 PM   #24
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oh man the full band version is so much better.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 06:17 PM   #25
Mouths of Babes
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The acoustic reworking of the song is much better - but the song works better with the full band. Hopefully that means the album version should be a good one.

 
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Old 10-09-2007, 08:38 PM   #26
Tchocky
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mouths of Babes
That's bothering you? Did you bother to read ANYTHING they said on the site or on confirmation pages/email -- or have you only spent your time writing and digging for fake reviews? No one received a download code yet. No one will receive a download email for many hours yet. Like, get a grip dude.
SIR YES SIR!

 
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