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Old 10-26-2021, 10:18 AM   #1
topleybird
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Unhappy Joe Biden getting crushed in a freak monster truck rally accident IN HELL

Yeah, he was trying to drum up support for the infrastructure bill by attending Monster Jam in Milwaukee, and apparently he got the idea to get in the pit and have a truck jump him, and he scrambled down into the arena before the Secret Service couldn't stop him.



And then Grave Digger ran over him.

Fortunately, Max-D driver Tom Meentz reacted quickly, and performed his signature double-flip by driving over our now-former president. The crowd thought it was all part of the act.



It was only later when Worldstar published this artist's conception of Biden's broken form that the nation became aware it was now rudderless.



When reached for comment, Senator Kyrsten Sinema (AZ-D[?]), pictured, issued the following statement: "LOL. LMAO."


 
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Old 10-26-2021, 10:24 AM   #2
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with a name like gravedigger you have to expect something like this

 
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Old 10-26-2021, 10:38 AM   #3
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Lightbulb

I would say the name is ironic, but my sources tell me audience members regularly get flattened to paste beneath its 66" tall wheels of mayhem as a sort of blood sacrifice

Monster Jam is like Disney World, though, where you cannot be said to die on the premises; lately the hungry, driverless truck's victims have been added to the inflated COVID fatality list

 
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Old 10-26-2021, 10:54 AM   #4
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i always said, to any ol' person around me, "this president, this is gonna be the first president to be killed by a monster truck"

only wish i'd taken a more overtly fuzzyroses approach to it and put down hard cash on the matter, maybe i could be president with that kind of money

 
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Old 10-26-2021, 10:55 AM   #5
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anyway, r.i.p. Sleepy Joe

sweet boy can finally sleep for real...

 
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Old 10-26-2021, 11:35 AM   #6
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Unhappy

It really is better this way

He's with his beautiful boy now

Unfortunate that President Harris's first official act was to try to arrest Grave Digger, which would have resulted in quite the legal kerfuffle over whether a demon-possessed truck could be tried in a court of law had the vehicle not eluded state and local police and gone on an unstoppable murder spree across this great nation

Also not great that her second official act was to triple every police department's budget and supply all of them with special Truckbuster assault vehicles, designed years ago specifically to subdue and execute Grave Digger if it went rogue; you know they're just gonna use that shit to run over protesters

 
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Old 10-26-2021, 12:36 PM   #7
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YEAH!

 
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Old 10-26-2021, 11:35 PM   #8
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Wish I could understand how disposable roasting trays gunning it around on carved mud can draw those crowds.

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 02:21 AM   #9
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Wish I could understand how disposable roasting trays gunning it around on carved mud can draw those crowds.
Guess you gotta be one of them to understand their culture.

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 08:20 AM   #10
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swing low
sweet monster truck
Coming for to carry me home

RIP

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 10:15 AM   #11
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Wish I could understand how disposable roasting trays gunning it around on carved mud can draw those crowds.

It's a metaphorical expression of their fear of being replaced and their anger at their perceived loss of racial and economic privilege.

How hard is that to see?

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 10:17 AM   #12
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Guess you gotta be one of them to understand their culture.

via GIPHY


 
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Old 10-27-2021, 10:18 AM   #13
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swing low
sweet monster truck
Coming for to carry me home

RIP
If you can dream it, there's a monster truck for that


 
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Old 10-27-2021, 11:39 AM   #14
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Wish I could understand how disposable roasting trays gunning it around on carved mud can draw those crowds.
iz just cool, man. you gotta go to get it! tommy and i went to a monster truck jam for balentimes. it was a definitely a draw for kids more than anything but you could tell the adults were into it.

the whole crowd went wild when megasaurus came out. it's like a cheesy action b-film in real life:

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 11:42 AM   #15
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It's a metaphorical expression of their fear of being replaced and their anger at their perceived loss of racial and economic privilege.

How hard is that to see?
you're thinking of privileged and segregated activities like golf, lacrosse, yachting, hockey, nascar, white girl yoga, tennis, croquet, baseball, and recreational bicycling replete with all the expensive gear and inability to keeps it real...similar to white girl yoga. they're either expensive to play or expensive to watch

so let the proletariat have their monster truck fun, y'all!

Last edited by yo soy el mejor : 10-27-2021 at 11:54 AM.

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 11:52 AM   #16
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Old 10-27-2021, 01:25 PM   #17
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The disdainfully classist part of me wants to look down my nose at the toothless tobacco-gummers who attend monster-truck rallies.

But then I see a video of a huge metal 12,000 lbs. mechanical behemoth doing a triple backflip, and I'm like, fuck, I'd pay money to see that.

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 01:26 PM   #18
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The only way to get around this problem without doing damage to my self-image is to profess to like monster trucks "ironically."

It's not the same when I like them as when dumb poor people like them.

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 02:36 PM   #19
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The only way to get around this problem without doing damage to my self-image is to profess to like monster trucks "ironically."

It's not the same when I like them as when dumb poor people like them.
Sorry but this is post Irony America!

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 04:27 PM   #20
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Cool

Personally, for me, it started with



and continued with



Have I outgrown these childish things? Sure. Do I sometimes push on one of my cats' paws so his claws come out and sing the Animal theme to myself? Sure

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 04:45 PM   #21
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growing up my bio dad had a friend who owned a monster truck called The Ice Monster. Somewhere i have a photo of my little brother sitting inside the wheel of the truck. I don't know what happened to that guy or his truck, but he was a scary, violent, gun carrying hick and I suspect if he's still alive he would have been storming the capitol on Jan 6

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 04:48 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yo soy el mejor View Post
you're thinking of privileged and segregated activities like golf, lacrosse, yachting, hockey, nascar, white girl yoga, tennis, croquet, baseball, and recreational bicycling replete with all the expensive gear and inability to keeps it real...similar to white girl yoga. they're either expensive to play or expensive to watch

so let the proletariat have their monster truck fun, y'all!
having grown up in the stands at monster truck rallies, tractor pulls, and stock car races I have to partly disagree. The same people that go to monster truck rallies are the people who go to NASCAR. I have extended family members who have been put in jail for not paying their child support, but they always have money for this shit. They may be proletariat, but they're racist as all hell

Last edited by MyOneAndOnly : 10-27-2021 at 05:16 PM.

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 04:53 PM   #23
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Originally Posted by topleybird View Post
Personally, for me, it started with

Have I outgrown these childish things? Sure. Do I sometimes push on one of my cats' paws so his claws come out and sing the Animal theme to myself? Sure

I remember these being big when I was in elementary school.



But my parents bought me a different brand called Rough Riders and i got teased at school because everyone said "Stompers are cool and Rough Riders are gay!"

And that was the end for me

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 05:48 PM   #24
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having grown up in the stands at monster truck rallies, tractor pulls, and stock car races I have to partly disagree. The same people that go to monster truck rallies are the people who go to NASCAR. I have extended family members who have been put in jail for not paying their child support, but they always have money for this shit. They may be proletariat, but they're racist as all hell
be that as it may, there are plenty of neoliberal and regular racists within every other activity i mentioned. i understand you have fraught background regarding monster trucks, but white hicks are not the only white racists out there or the only ones to call out or be afraid of....

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 05:49 PM   #25
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I remember these being big when I was in elementary school.



But my parents bought me a different brand called Rough Riders and i got teased at school because everyone said "Stompers are cool and Rough Riders are gay!"

And that was the end for me
was this before or after DMX? 'cause you could've had some shit to say

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 06:25 PM   #26
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be that as it may, there are plenty of neoliberal and regular racists within every other activity i mentioned. i understand you have fraught background regarding monster trucks, but white hicks are not the only white racists out there or the only ones to call out or be afraid of....
True. Hicks are pawns of the racists who are actually in power

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 06:26 PM   #27
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was this before or after DMX? 'cause you could've had some shit to say

 
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Old 10-27-2021, 09:38 PM   #28
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When they finally get around to developing commercially available MechWarriors, I like to think that Monster Jam and WWE will undergo a natural merger.

 
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Old 11-02-2021, 01:25 AM   #29
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tractor pulls
What is a this?

 
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Old 11-02-2021, 05:46 AM   #30
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it's when you and a partner put anal beads up your asses and then try to pull the beads out of your partner's ass without letting them come out of your own ass

 
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