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10-26-2021, 10:18 AM | #1 |
Janis Jopleybird
Location: Let me see you do the booty hop. And now make the booty stop. Now drop, and do the booty wop.
Posts: 6,564
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Joe Biden getting crushed in a freak monster truck rally accident IN HELL
Yeah, he was trying to drum up support for the infrastructure bill by attending Monster Jam in Milwaukee, and apparently he got the idea to get in the pit and have a truck jump him, and he scrambled down into the arena before the Secret Service couldn't stop him.
And then Grave Digger ran over him. Fortunately, Max-D driver Tom Meentz reacted quickly, and performed his signature double-flip by driving over our now-former president. The crowd thought it was all part of the act. It was only later when Worldstar published this artist's conception of Biden's broken form that the nation became aware it was now rudderless. When reached for comment, Senator Kyrsten Sinema (AZ-D[?]), pictured, issued the following statement: "LOL. LMAO." |
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10-26-2021, 10:24 AM | #2 |
Braindead
Location: i like traffic lights, but only when they're green.
Posts: 15,724
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with a name like gravedigger you have to expect something like this
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10-26-2021, 10:38 AM | #3 |
Janis Jopleybird
Location: Let me see you do the booty hop. And now make the booty stop. Now drop, and do the booty wop.
Posts: 6,564
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I would say the name is ironic, but my sources tell me audience members regularly get flattened to paste beneath its 66" tall wheels of mayhem as a sort of blood sacrifice
Monster Jam is like Disney World, though, where you cannot be said to die on the premises; lately the hungry, driverless truck's victims have been added to the inflated COVID fatality list |
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10-26-2021, 10:54 AM | #4 |
Minion of Satan
Location: andy dick NAKED
Posts: 8,166
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i always said, to any ol' person around me, "this president, this is gonna be the first president to be killed by a monster truck"
only wish i'd taken a more overtly fuzzyroses approach to it and put down hard cash on the matter, maybe i could be president with that kind of money |
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10-26-2021, 10:55 AM | #5 |
Minion of Satan
Location: andy dick NAKED
Posts: 8,166
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anyway, r.i.p. Sleepy Joe
sweet boy can finally sleep for real... |
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10-26-2021, 11:35 AM | #6 |
Janis Jopleybird
Location: Let me see you do the booty hop. And now make the booty stop. Now drop, and do the booty wop.
Posts: 6,564
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It really is better this way
He's with his beautiful boy now Unfortunate that President Harris's first official act was to try to arrest Grave Digger, which would have resulted in quite the legal kerfuffle over whether a demon-possessed truck could be tried in a court of law had the vehicle not eluded state and local police and gone on an unstoppable murder spree across this great nation Also not great that her second official act was to triple every police department's budget and supply all of them with special Truckbuster assault vehicles, designed years ago specifically to subdue and execute Grave Digger if it went rogue; you know they're just gonna use that shit to run over protesters |
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10-26-2021, 12:36 PM | #7 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
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10-26-2021, 11:35 PM | #8 |
Minion of Satan
Posts: 6,781
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Wish I could understand how disposable roasting trays gunning it around on carved mud can draw those crowds.
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10-27-2021, 02:21 AM | #9 |
Dute of Seven Y's
Location: Mr. C's garage
Posts: 7,764
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10-27-2021, 08:20 AM | #10 |
Ownz
Posts: 627
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swing low
sweet monster truck Coming for to carry me home RIP |
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10-27-2021, 10:15 AM | #11 | |
Shut the fuck up!
Location: "Okay, white power feminist" - yo soy el mejor
Posts: 23,878
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Quote:
It's a metaphorical expression of their fear of being replaced and their anger at their perceived loss of racial and economic privilege. How hard is that to see? |
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10-27-2021, 10:18 AM | #13 |
Shut the fuck up!
Location: "Okay, white power feminist" - yo soy el mejor
Posts: 23,878
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10-27-2021, 11:39 AM | #14 | |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
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Quote:
the whole crowd went wild when megasaurus came out. it's like a cheesy action b-film in real life: |
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10-27-2021, 11:42 AM | #15 | |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
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Quote:
so let the proletariat have their monster truck fun, y'all! Last edited by yo soy el mejor : 10-27-2021 at 11:54 AM. |
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10-27-2021, 11:52 AM | #16 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
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10-27-2021, 01:25 PM | #17 |
Minion of Satan
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,849
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The disdainfully classist part of me wants to look down my nose at the toothless tobacco-gummers who attend monster-truck rallies.
But then I see a video of a huge metal 12,000 lbs. mechanical behemoth doing a triple backflip, and I'm like, fuck, I'd pay money to see that. |
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10-27-2021, 01:26 PM | #18 |
Minion of Satan
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,849
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The only way to get around this problem without doing damage to my self-image is to profess to like monster trucks "ironically."
It's not the same when I like them as when dumb poor people like them. |
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10-27-2021, 02:36 PM | #19 |
Shut the fuck up!
Location: "Okay, white power feminist" - yo soy el mejor
Posts: 23,878
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10-27-2021, 04:27 PM | #20 |
Janis Jopleybird
Location: Let me see you do the booty hop. And now make the booty stop. Now drop, and do the booty wop.
Posts: 6,564
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Personally, for me, it started with
and continued with Have I outgrown these childish things? Sure. Do I sometimes push on one of my cats' paws so his claws come out and sing the Animal theme to myself? Sure |
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10-27-2021, 04:45 PM | #21 |
Shut the fuck up!
Location: "Okay, white power feminist" - yo soy el mejor
Posts: 23,878
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growing up my bio dad had a friend who owned a monster truck called The Ice Monster. Somewhere i have a photo of my little brother sitting inside the wheel of the truck. I don't know what happened to that guy or his truck, but he was a scary, violent, gun carrying hick and I suspect if he's still alive he would have been storming the capitol on Jan 6
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10-27-2021, 04:48 PM | #22 | |
Shut the fuck up!
Location: "Okay, white power feminist" - yo soy el mejor
Posts: 23,878
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Quote:
Last edited by MyOneAndOnly : 10-27-2021 at 05:16 PM. |
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10-27-2021, 04:53 PM | #23 | |
Shut the fuck up!
Location: "Okay, white power feminist" - yo soy el mejor
Posts: 23,878
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Quote:
I remember these being big when I was in elementary school. But my parents bought me a different brand called Rough Riders and i got teased at school because everyone said "Stompers are cool and Rough Riders are gay!" And that was the end for me |
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10-27-2021, 05:48 PM | #24 | |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
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Quote:
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10-27-2021, 05:49 PM | #25 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
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was this before or after DMX? 'cause you could've had some shit to say
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10-27-2021, 06:25 PM | #26 | |
Shut the fuck up!
Location: "Okay, white power feminist" - yo soy el mejor
Posts: 23,878
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Quote:
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10-27-2021, 06:26 PM | #27 |
Shut the fuck up!
Location: "Okay, white power feminist" - yo soy el mejor
Posts: 23,878
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10-27-2021, 09:38 PM | #28 |
Minion of Satan
Posts: 6,781
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When they finally get around to developing commercially available MechWarriors, I like to think that Monster Jam and WWE will undergo a natural merger.
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11-02-2021, 01:25 AM | #29 |
Dute of Seven Y's
Location: Mr. C's garage
Posts: 7,764
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11-02-2021, 05:46 AM | #30 |
Braindead
Posts: 18,608
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it's when you and a partner put anal beads up your asses and then try to pull the beads out of your partner's ass without letting them come out of your own ass
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