Originally Posted by reprise85
yeah thats true. but i did write this after i stopped being suicidal, so it was me trying to remember. i never did a really foolproof method of suicide, but it was looking inevitable for a long time. like 4-5 years. shit was terrible in any case.
one of my old friends attempted suicide many times. this was back in the 90s. He planned it so that he wouldn't actually be successful, but at the time none of us realized what he was doing. He knew exactly how much of any particular drug he needed to take to almost die. When he did that he had a routine he'd go through where he'd act out, fight with his parents who hated him for being gay and beg for sympathy from all our friends. He'd write crazy fucked up long letters to some of us, threatening what he would do. After a while it got old. And then in our 20s he seemed to leave it behind somehow.
a couple of years ago he did kill himself. the sad thing is that there was no warning. he seemed to have been "normal" for many years. None of his old school routine. he was just there one day and a few days later I found out he'd done it. No notes to anybody. No warning. Nothing. One day he was there and then dead.