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-   -   Rolling "Shits Recently Taken" Thread (http://forums.netphoria.org/showthread.php?t=159238)

redbreegull 08-06-2023 09:29 PM

that's just a function of a small toilet. you'll feel humbled the next time you climb on a big boy and your penis spins around like a clapper in an oversized bell, doomed to never reach its perimeter target

ilikeplanets 08-06-2023 10:04 PM

Just when I thought I couldn't hate this thread more

slunken 08-12-2023 02:18 PM

My toilet's been bonkers lately. No flush power. I'm hitting the button multiple times.

ourruseoffools 08-13-2023 12:56 PM

I need to see a gastroenterologist

ovary 08-13-2023 02:33 PM

my ass has been a lot better since i washed it

slunken 08-14-2023 11:02 PM

I just miss being able to step back and admire the horse pile

now i'm flushing in intervals

*what have i become/my sweetest friend*

ovary 09-08-2023 06:48 AM

i am stuck on the can

the chipotle was spicer than usual last night

i do not forsee a happy ending

a burning turd is lodged stuck amid my gaping orifice

hope this half roll of TP is sufficient.

not sure i'll be able to pinch off but i gotta go to work

ovary 02-15-2024 10:40 PM

my butthole has seized up again. this hasn't happened since i first saw timothee chalamet fuck a peach in "call me by your name." this time i haven't been watching any gay shit or anything.

redbreegull 02-15-2024 11:18 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by slunken (Post 4630853)
I just miss being able to step back and admire the horse pile

now i'm flushing in intervals

*what have i become/my sweetest friend*

my empire of night soil

ovary 08-19-2024 08:06 PM

i feel again i have to poop,
so to the can i plod,
shoulders slouched
resigned, aloof.
suspecting yet
more spinchter fraud.

it happens every day, you see,
and all of each day too:
my ass will whisper
"empty me"
but when i push,
no shit, no poo.

dear god: why hath thou sentenced me
to so much toilet time?
doomed to sit
yet merely pee,
a tortured
straining mime?

run2pee 08-21-2024 11:10 PM

Yall are constipated

That or had too much cheese check if your lacto

great poster 08-22-2024 01:29 AM

or in my case too much kratom

redbreegull 08-22-2024 05:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by run2pee (Post 4649468)
Yall are constipated

That or had too much cheese check if your lacto

born to shit, forced to wipe

Ihaguitar 08-25-2024 05:24 AM

Shitting after a course of antibiotics really sucks.

john's ego 10-05-2024 02:58 AM

warms my cockles to see this on page 1

mxzombie 10-07-2024 03:23 PM

netphoria's most successful thread?

more at 11

john's ego 10-11-2024 04:42 AM

Got rocked by a fucking 7 today

MyOneAndOnly 10-12-2024 11:16 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by redbreegull (Post 4649478)
born to shit, forced to wipe

get a bidet, loser!

MyOneAndOnly 10-12-2024 11:17 PM

Ate Cambodian food 2 days in a row... Now i'm paying the price

MyOneAndOnly 10-13-2024 08:05 PM

make that three days... had some leftovers

FoolofaTook 10-19-2024 04:02 PM

after taking a poop and wiping, I stood up to inspect the delivered payload before flushing (I always do this. it's a thing).

and there was this weird little red fragment on the seat, right where the top of my buttcrack rests. it looked like dried chili pepper or something. what was it? dried blood? dried poop? congealed gochujang? looked kinda tasty but I resisted (not even a sniff) and wiped it off and flushed it away with the rest.

:confused:

Plasticine Rap Star 10-19-2024 04:27 PM

Could've been worth money. Shouldn't have flushed it.

MyOneAndOnly 10-19-2024 05:34 PM

You tasted it didn't you? You know what that was

yo soy el mejor 10-25-2024 01:36 PM

i took a picture of an impressive poop the other day but i haven't found anyone to show yet. i told my friend i did it but she didn't wanna see but i know she was curious.

ovary 10-25-2024 06:24 PM

this is a classic "pics or it didn't happen" situation

yo soy el mejor 11-30-2024 04:14 PM

i still have it on my phone so that must mean i could show it one day. i'm just not there yet.

sometimes i can't fathom how certain turds form and come out so long when i'm so short and be sitting down a bunch. you'd think my guts would snap anything in half. shit's crazy

redbreegull 12-03-2024 03:29 AM

y'all ever used a whole roll on one go?

smashingjj 12-04-2024 09:57 AM

Always, just to be sure!

redbreegull 12-05-2024 10:01 PM

people are flushing the toilet 10, 15 times


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