ima shower in the shit ayyyyyyyyyy

so, you guys like poetry?

there once was a peculiar fellow
whose name was more red than yellow
his drain he did scour
to shit in the shower
whenever his bowels felt like jello

In the stall, trickling down the wall
I lift a leg, and void it all
I try to sit, try to shit
But my log succumbs to this clog

Insufferable wanking
Your father's arse I'm spanking
Slap it hard, make it red
His insides feel like a loaf of bread

ya but sometimes i kinda don't

I essentially never take a bath, unless I'm sick. My bathroom doesn't have a tub, only the main bathroom (in the hallway fsr) does. I also basically never get to shower alone, so the entire experience is definitely not relaxing for me. I still love it though, because I'm obsessed with shampoo fragrances. So nice.

in a typical bathtub i can only fill it enough to fit just my legs & butt in. toes usually stick out of the water. upper body has no hope of being submerged.

how about your cock?

There's absolutely nothing off-putting about this whatsoever! And it smells as wonderful as it looks!

Definitely can't move your face once it starts drying, either. But it's definitely improving my skin.

just drank 2 energy shots to feel something. 2:30am local time. my sleep schedule is a night mare

korean baseball at 5:30 am tho

Behold! The Ram27’s Sleep Schedule

Yeah. Me too. Could use some whirl pools sleep here in a minute, yet can’t stop eating the wrong Oreos that we got instead of the ones that we wanted, since Oreos are all fucked for the pandemic along with groceries and everything

But yeah

i'm guessing that 2 energy shots will invariably disturb your sleep schedule...
possibly toxic for your heart too.

Yeah, he's going to feel something alright... his first heart attack by age 30!

Seriously, though, be safe dear Ram.

Don't listen to these losers ram. Next time you should chase those shots with a big Redbull.

Lol are these some Adventists? Is this michael Campbell’s various dads shooting the shit about Jesus and everyone?

Haha, don't I wish so! At first when I was looking for funny gifs I tried searching for certain pastors and theologians of the SDA variety. But alas! there were none. Then thanks to Monte's tweeter I was introduced to Russell Nelson, president and prophet of the latter days saints and the rest is, as they say in france, kaput!

(russ is in the middle)

thanks lads. i never fuck with stimulants usually

the quarantine depression is really setting in in the last week or so for some reason. like it's may and we're still doing this. and it's not even novel anymore; all the jokes have been made, all the articles have been written. it just keeps going on and on

mike pence might get it tho

the only difference about quarantine is that everyone is suddenly doing what i've been doing for the past decade

Dunno whether to lol or :( with u

Yeah. Isolation. Did 6 yrs of that myself. Things i liked/miss, but overall it led to a lot of unhealthy sorta weird mutant plants growin in my garden of my heart and shit. At least u get on the board and converse a lot, that’s gotta help. During that time i didn’t do internet or smartphone, it was just the 1 or 2 unavoidable convos from the ppl at work, maybe the librarian ladies, and then possibly a band practice at night, during the lucky/good/rare times that i was playing music with other ppl. Other than that wouldn’t see/talk to a soul.

Anyway, yeah. It’s weird to see everyone else having to do it, now

I used to know isolation pretty well so I tried to just isolate myself before I was really forced to. but I had become much more gregarian...

anyways, can we stop rejoicing at the prospect of someone in particular getting the virus? it's pointless.

there is still a great possibility that it will hit you someday too. and an even greater possibility that you'll survive just fine (that one's for reassurance but still true).

I wouldn't say that I rejoice at the prospect of anyone getting it, but there is a small feeling of amusement when people who are so against PPE and closures have to face the danger of their recklessness.

well i got that job cleaning up human shit, among other things. thank fucking god! i am afraid somehow the hire letter will get to the county and they'll be like "actually we can't afford to hire new people now"