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-   -   Rolling "Shits Recently Taken" Thread (http://forums.netphoria.org/showthread.php?t=159238)

beef curtains 01-01-2009 02:31 PM

I live in 4-6 (average 5.75) land with frequent visits to 7 town... This morning was a 5

Ol' Couch Ass 01-01-2009 02:35 PM

Oh man I just kicked off the new year with a 5.5. Not a good start. I feel like a pitcher who just gave up a homerun to the leadoff hitter. All I can do now is bear down and try to keep the game close.

threetwooneZERO 01-01-2009 04:03 PM

I had a type 4 and 5 going on yesterday....they were kind of alternating.

I hope today is more consistent.

commando 01-01-2009 05:13 PM

2 days ago at work I crapped like a 15" type 3. It went straight down the hole and came to rest. When I pinched it it the top smacked the back of my sack as it flopped down against the porcelain. I was like wtf- and when I looked down I couldn't believe all that came out of me so fast. Took like 2 squeezes.

Also, this morning I rocked a type 5-- and a lot of it-- after eating my weight in real mexican last night. It burned a little from the pickled jalepeno I ate, but there was so much it formed like this loaf of bread looking concoction. Amazing.

avsfan7733 01-01-2009 05:25 PM

new year's day for me generally = beer shits and beer farts. I feel bad for anyone walking behind me.

pale_princess 01-01-2009 05:47 PM

i just had a type one. NOT FUN. i ate a lot of cheese last night, so whatever.

Hillzy 01-01-2009 07:20 PM

For most of my life I've been pretty consistently sitting in the 2-4 range. However, last year I started a course of medication which has me at 5 or 6 every time. I look foward to one day reattaining the lower classes.

Shallowed 01-01-2009 07:53 PM

A couple of days ago, I had a naked pre-shower #3 shit.

Nothing to it, just sat down, BAM, done, wipe, flush, shower.

A

Shallowed 01-01-2009 07:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mxzombie (Post 3245582)

Conversely, sometimes I push type ones, which take a while to pass, then move into rapid firing type six and seven territory. It's pretty much impossible to enjoy, unless you're some kind of poop masochist.

F

pale_princess 01-01-2009 08:19 PM

just took a pretty sweet #6. id give 'er an a- cuz the pee came afterward instead of beforehand

bardy 01-01-2009 08:26 PM

type 2's rip your butt apart, why are they your favorite?

beef curtains 01-01-2009 10:17 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by pale_princess (Post 3416418)
just took a pretty sweet #6. id give 'er an a- cuz the pee came afterward instead of beforehand

Did that raise or lower the grade?

pale_princess 01-01-2009 11:05 PM

lower!

killtrocity 01-01-2009 11:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bardy (Post 3416423)
type 2's rip your butt apart, why are they your favorite?

They are the most solid, so poo doesn't rub off on your asshole and bum hair. If the break is clean like Thaniel said you get the satisfaction of pooping with almost zero cleanup


Just evacuated a dark purple Type 1-3 hybrid. C+.

commando 01-02-2009 01:01 PM

So who here has dropped a bright green shit before?

Thaniel Buckner 01-02-2009 01:03 PM

it happens to me regularly during the month of march.


mcdonald's shamrock shakes are too good to resist.

beef curtains 01-02-2009 02:03 PM

3 fiery # 6s this morning. One beer and some spicy sweet chili doritos have royally messed me up. Damn you stephen colbert for getting me hooked

Ol' Couch Ass 01-02-2009 02:26 PM

I like number 2s as they are often what I refer to as immaculate defecation ie you drop a deuce and then when you wipe there is nothing to be found on the TP. It's a miracle!

Mariner 01-02-2009 03:51 PM

guys i love you all and i love this thread / somewhere HOODY's ears are burning

bardy 01-02-2009 06:24 PM

I took a poop a week or so ago that suggested that either I can't digest onions or that I have a tapeworm. I have had them before (the onion looking things). I think I will just ask the doctor for a blood test when I go for my checkup. They don't cause any real damage except vitamin deficiency and WEIGHT LOSS! woot.

ella 01-02-2009 06:32 PM

For all the girls out there, you guys ever get the period poops...???

Iknowgrossamiright

I swear though, it's bullshit, it makes that week far more worse then it definitely already and obviously is.

Ol' Couch Ass 01-02-2009 06:37 PM

SmellyPoop.com - Send a Free Greeting Card, Buy Some Crap, Send Your Friends Poop, PiSSed.

bardy 01-02-2009 07:54 PM

I might have worms guys!!! how gross would that be! too much sushi?

Hillzy 01-02-2009 09:02 PM

Just dropped an absolutely beautiful #3. Not at all what I was expecting but hey I'm not complaining, it was a great way to start the day.

ravenguy2000 01-02-2009 09:05 PM

You people are gross.

That is all, carry on. For some reason I can't stop reading this thread anyway.

beef curtains 01-02-2009 10:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ella (Post 3416842)
For all the girls out there, you guys ever get the period poops...???

Iknowgrossamiright

I swear though, it's bullshit, it makes that week far more worse then it definitely already and obviously is.

The smearies???

I'm livin it. 31 days and counting

reprise85 01-02-2009 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ella (Post 3416842)
For all the girls out there, you guys ever get the period poops...???

Iknowgrossamiright

I swear though, it's bullshit, it makes that week far more worse then it definitely already and obviously is.

I ALWAYS get this. It is such bullshit. Especially on like the 3rd period day where the blood is almost like gushing and no matter how much I clean my vag before the poop hole blood still gets all over my fucking hand and wrist. Ugh I feel your pain ella.

gross gross gross

beef curtains 01-02-2009 10:43 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ravenguy2000 (Post 3416900)
You people are gross.

That is all, carry on. For some reason I can't stop reading this thread anyway.

What? How can you have anal sex and be grossed out by poop? Same question for straight guys who are scared of vaginas... you gotta pay to play

bardy 01-03-2009 01:13 AM

my periods only last like 1.5 days so I dont know what period poops are

bardy 01-03-2009 01:20 AM

oh. I like those. I have issues with 1-3

bardy 01-03-2009 01:24 AM

I think my intestines have a larger diameter than my butt

ella 01-03-2009 01:35 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by reprise85 (Post 3416939)
I ALWAYS get this. It is such bullshit. Especially on like the 3rd period day where the blood is almost like gushing and no matter how much I clean my vag before the poop hole blood still gets all over my fucking hand and wrist. Ugh I feel your pain ella.

gross gross gross

Oh my, I didn't even know you were a girl... lol

I don't ever gush blood though reprise, you must have some heavy periods. =( Sorry....
Sounds like your shit is much more intense than mine. Poor girl!

I'm Hardcore 01-03-2009 01:36 AM

this thread is beginning to give me rigor mortis in my pants

ella 01-03-2009 02:04 AM

Blood and shit gives you a stiffy huh?

I'm Hardcore 01-03-2009 02:14 AM

:embarass:

Mariner 01-03-2009 02:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beef curtains (Post 3416940)
... you gotta pay to play

could you say that again but more pointed at this non-suspicious bulge in my shirt

beef curtains 01-03-2009 12:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mariner (Post 3417072)
could you say that again but more pointed at this non-suspicious bulge in my shirt

your boner comes up out the top of your pants and into your shirt?? :eek:

mxzombie 01-03-2009 01:44 PM

yours doesn't?

mxzombie 01-03-2009 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by commando (Post 3416732)
So who here has dropped a bright green shit before?

every time i eat a box of crunch berries

Mariner 01-03-2009 03:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by beef curtains (Post 3417229)
your boner comes up out the top of your pants and into your shirt?? :eek:


perhaps you misunderstand, governer curtaijevich


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