bought some street food yesterday and since then ive been feeling like utter shit and shitting utter liquid.
almost out of toilet paper but feeling too shitty to get some more from the store. there is, however, the spraygun that muslims use. time for a rectal blast? :D |
this is what is known as a "silver lining"
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i wish i could put a thread on my ignore list
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yeah i know the jimmy eat world thread is brutal
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Are You Walking Around With Dirty Anus? A Guide To Good Butt Hygiene
Talking about good butt hygiene is a taboo in our society, and we need to change it as millions of people walk around with dirty anuses every day. Individuals need to understand that wiping with dry toilet paper doesn’t equivalent to cleaning. You wouldn’t shower with a dry towel; why do you think that dry toilet paper cleans you? Look at it this way: You were eating melted chocolate, and now your face and hands are dirty with melted chocolate. Would you use just dry paper to clean your face and hands or would you wash also? But beside this, why is good butt hygiene important? Reduces risks of spreading E.coli and other bacteria to intimate area. It is estimated that 60 to 70% of women will experience at least one episode of urinary tract infection (UTI) during their lifetime. UTI is caused by bacteria that come from the perineum and anal area. Keeps the underwear clean. If you work out or live in a humid environment, then your sweat flows down your spine and spreads the shit and bacteria to your underwear and thighs. Bad personal hygiene is number 1 turn off for both sexes. In history, people used to have a moisturizing component like water + soap or water and oil for cleaning and used paper for drying. Dry toilet paper became popular during world wars as water was scarce in trenches and front line. Recently people in western societies have started to realize that using just paper is bad hygiene. This has brought a surge of adults who are using baby wipes to clean themselves. Wet wipes do the job, but unfortunately cause a lot of problems for the environment (killing marine life, littering beaches) and wrecking sewers all over the world and are also quite expensive to use daily. In 2015 The Guardian called the wet wipes the biggest villain of the year, and from that point, the situation only has gotten worst. Nowadays there are legal cases in US and UK to ban the selling of flushable wet wipes as experts say they are not flushable. What are the options: Taking a full body shower. An excellent option that we recommend if you have time and option to use it after taking number 2. It is advised to use soap to wash and a special cream also afterward as water alone doesn’t clean and dries the skin. Bidet: A good option if full body shower is not possible. It is advised to use soap to wash and a special cream also afterward as water alone doesn’t clean and also dries the skin. Wet Wipes: Does the job, but please help to keep the environment and marine life alive and throw the dirty wet wipe to the trash bin and not into the toilet. Read more: Are flushable wet wipes flushable? Gel Wipe: If you don’t want to take a shower every time or are traveling or hiking, then it’s a perfect solution. It cleans and disinfects thanks to the small amount of pure alcohol in it and there’s also a bit of panthenol to moisturize and soothes skin. It can also be used on children under age of 3 as an alternative to baby wipes. Use just dry toilet paper: A good option if you don’t care about hygiene and walking around with dirty anus is fine for you. |
well the poop has solidified more or less but i am still taking hella frequent dumps (four in an hour since waking). also whenever i eat something it feels like a rock in my gut.
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In a dream we are connected
Siamese twins at the anus |
so i got some antibiotics and anti-diarrhea pills for five days. they cost: 9 bucks.
god bless SE Asia. |
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Like falling feces The toilet bowl disappeared Laughing into the poop Is it always like this? Flesh and blood and the first dump The first feces The first dump We writhed under a shit storm Voodoo crap Siamese twins I sit on the toilet and strain for an hour Then everything falls apart Broken inside me It falls apart |
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I've made big boys every morning since getting back from Florida two weeks ago. I think not going to work is helping my routine. That, and the increase in kale and nuts to do my diet.
Thanks for attending my TED Talk. |
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oh and here i thought your "prayer meeting" with my dad might of widened your rectal canal a bit |
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Take that to mean what you will. |
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Someone's turtleheading...
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low blow, flameglo
low blow |
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Obligatory mention that they were filming that scene when 9/11 happened and they had a moment of silence before going back into it
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I'm genuinely glad I know that now, thank you
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i think you know why
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... because he made a big boy?
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Jet fuel can't melt toilet bowls.
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haven't been eating much. only had a smoothie one day. the next day (yesterday) i shit 4 times.
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I just made a perfectly formed, foot and a half long "J" in the bathroom at work.
Thanks for attending my TED talk. |
Was that for me, Smashingjj, or "Big-J" Whatcolour?
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:(
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back on topic everyone.
i started this thread nearly 12 years ago today. |
Most likely true. Does not matter. More a symptom of a sick, mad world
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Dotting the 'j'. |
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I ate a buttload of habanero salsa last night and this morning my bootyhole's burning like Waco.
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i ate more of the salsa. then i drank a shit-ton of coffee. the anal inferno continues!
and it burns, burns, burns, that ring of fire |
I did the Paqui chip challenge this past winter. The stomach cramps from it nearly made me pass out. What it does to the lower intestines and bowel is truly horrifying.
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