The worst part is you can’t even throw the pull yourself up by the bootstraps advice in her boomer face, because she has inconveniently been really very good to you

I have no desire to...? That mantra isn't really our family's philosophy anyway. And having aging parents in your face is eye opening in many ways.

Sorry, ill-timed dark humour

Totally get you about aging parents...we’ve moved out but they’re still very much in our faces

A woman in one of my FB groups about the town I live in says that a donut shop would "really put our town on the map" and recalls "piling in the car to drive several hours to get Dairy Queen. What a treat!" and calls that a memorable trip. Get me out of here and into a city!

you don't think people like that live in cities?

the dumbassery is just more heavily concentrated

There is a terribly uniquely rural lifestyle here that I know for a fact is not replicated in a city, since I've lived in cities for close to 30 years. That's probably why I haven't been able to adjust to this manner of living despite being here for 3 years. I hate having to drive an hour away to go to a grocery store or doctor, and having no choice of school since there's just one crappy one. This town shuts down at 10 PM and has one main road with nothing on it. All the women my age have been married to their high school sweetheart since age 19 and are total bible thumpers, and I'm definitely not able to relate to much. And it's not even cheap here!! At least the view of the sky is good.

Wow. Yeah. That is indeed rural hell. Thought i had it bad during my sojourn but at least we had several main roads, instead of just the one. Still shut down around 10 though. Probably more like 8, actually. Can remember getting hungry at night and having the sinking terrible realization it was McDonald’s vs Taco Bell vs gas station trash. Or the old standby: starve until morning

go to bed when the sun sets like god intended and you wouldn't have that problem

u guys have fast food in your tiny towns?

mine had 2 gas stations and two restaurants, not sure when they closed though

and then like 3 florists, a tiny tiny library, and a thrift store. i think that was pretty much it. hardware store, i think it was actually an ace hardware which is kind of unbelievable

right before i moved away they got a dollar general which was a big fucking deal at the time. there were not any grocery stores

oh yeah there was a movie theater actually, one showing per day on weekends during the summer and a video rental place

i just looked through google streetview and there actually seems to be fewer businesses now somehow, well as of 2013 which is the last streetview

video rental place is still there too, lol. but now i only see one cafe and neither of the old restaurants or the library. yeah, library's gone according to the website

man tiny towns fucking suck

obviously there's like 10 churches too

oh shit the fast food resturant is called fuzzie's. latest it is open is indeed 8pm. damn it's an actual restaurant now it seems like, it had no seating before

yall are wack. tiny towns are awesome precisely because there are no people around. trees. sky. you can whip your dick out in the front yard. what else do you need, a different fuckin craft brewery for every night of the week? a fucking movie theater to go see some shitty fucking movie? more parking lots? cant whip your dick out in a parking lot!

my happiness is directly correlated to legality, availability, convenience, and ease of dick whipping

you just need to get famous and then you can do it without repercussions. and you'll have like at least a few years before you get completely cancelled

and even then you'll probably have a strangely adamant base of incels vehemently supporting you

if dick whipping is truly critical to your sense of happiness you should consider moving your life to China.
you could be walking behind a guy on a sidewalk and suddenly he breaks right and zipper's already halfway open

admittedly, there's not always a zipper

and let me tell you something else:

New pasta shape dropping today.

i just did that annoying fucking thing i heard about people doing which is cut down my social media time to 30min per day - which for some idiot reason i thought reddit didn't count as

but it is! anything that shows you so much content so quickly is a capitalist machine designed to have it overtake your life

it is an addiction innit

blue skies bring tearz. so maybe my internet usage will bleed into here. or maybe i'll kiss a girl

are you sure that isn't a liberated foreskin?

everytime major bites another person im like fuck yeah major, bite another one! bite them ALL!!!

I think i found the perfect house for the Netphoria season of The Real World

https://www.redfin.com/MD/Brooklyn-P.../home/10392075

It's the bedroom that does it for me

the white walls definitely soften the iron crosses

Oakland fans are really giving it to Houston by yelling racist remarks, that’ll definitely get your point across.

trying to apply for college, ram27 resume the pose tour 2021, and there's this smarmy ass horseshit fucking question

i mean how does high octane suicidal sound? fuck you