Similarly, I sometimes think about being in the background of other people's photos

You could be just a splotch way back, or you could be sitting right behind the subject on Splash Mountain

And someday, hey, there you are in a slideshow that person's family is playing at the funeral

ugh, yes!

as your heart yields to a slow stop and the darkness envelopes you in the long sleep your phone buzzes with one final Aladdin push notification

Do you have any writings that, if asked politely, you might be inclined to share?

Board posts don't count.

that's kind of you; i can check the archives and see if there's anything that doesn't trigger an overwhelming desire to crawl into a hole — though admittedly i'm not too hopeful

boy, it took just about every teaspoon of willpower to keep myself from pasting in the sonic johnny text

am i gay?

very much so

can you have sex with your girlfriend?

^

it's a pointless venture, labelle. at least in my experience, and especially recently

I don't think we can answer this for you

How can this be a real quote from an Australian politician the same day that at least one Australian citizen contributes to the shooting deaths of at least forty-nine people in New Zealand?

"I am utterly opposed to any form of violence within our community, and I totally condemn the actions of the gunman. However, while this kind of violent vigilantism can never be justified, what it highlights is the growing fear within our community, both in Australia and New Zealand, of the increasing Muslim presence. As always, left-wing politicians and the media will rush to claim that the causes of today's shootings lie with gun laws or those who hold nationalist views but this is all clichéd nonsense. The real cause of bloodshed on New Zealand streets today is the immigration program which allowed Muslim fanatics to migrate to New Zealand in the first place."

Vigilantism?

It's the fault of Muslim immigration in New Zealand that one or more Australians traveled to New Zealand to murder Muslims?

Pray for NZ

I’ve been puzzled by how everyone’s like “this is not us”

I mean technically

Ugh, nevermind

Fucking terrible

I mean do we file this under “only in a Australia”, maybe?

Good grief

Fucking knob

Jesus Christ that is so vile

Who said that?

That would be Australian Senator Fraser Anning

A special breed of Australian, hyper-racist, brain fried by the tropics, a literal redneck

like buzzard said: the same fucking day?

the message would be outrageous no matter when, but he's apparently blissfully unaware of concepts like basic decency?

Yeah. Check out his twitter feed though. It really is the same bad xenophobic drivel day after day. I mean we’re the insane ones if we expect normal behaviour from a guy who publicly states that 99% European population of Australia in the 1970s has now decreased to 70% so we better do something about it

The man is not in full control of his facilities

This fact has been conveniently masked by the unfortunate fact that not many Queenslanders are

He’s been blending in quite easily

got this msg from catty heel but i think it was for net4ia cause i sure as heck don't care. he thinks ur gonna miss him or something lol


I’m dealing with some stuff right now
Family stuff. It’s nothing against you. It’s just easier to not be on here while I’m dealing with stuff.

there is a scene in modern cinematic classic The Hangover where Ed Helms says to Zack Galifinakis: "good to knooow" which i am constantly wanting at my disposal precisely for moments like these

Well, what are you waiting for?

Dispose!

"My family Googled me to see what I've been up to and were horrified by the results".

Disney just rehired James Gunn to direct Guardians of the Galaxy 3, adding an unexpected last-minute twist to a very bizarre tale

I bet they calculated exactly how long they should wait until rehiring him.
A timeframe that allowed people who were mad to stop being mad, mildly progressive Captain Marvel that made progressives happy and the end game trailer that has everyone hyped.