ketchup and hot sauce are the only good condiments

anything white is probably bad [semen coded]

blood coded only

Sorry no. It’s all about verde

verde is the absolute king, but as i was gonna say in that post, do salsas count as condiments?

naked ass
leather seat
flatulence stirs
can't be discrete

lift one cheek
anus flutters
no time to reflect
before cowhide stutters

so i hang my head
curl my toes
grab a wet rag
and a garden hose

wipe myself down
spray off the cushion
a day in the life
can't stop me from pushin'

I’m handsome

My kids went through a stage where they put sriracha and kewpie mayo on everything.

I like sauce - I’d probably eat a burger with mayo, ketchup and mustard. Actually I have a friend who makes some kind of special dipping sauce out of those three plus bbq or something. And then he makes crumbed chicken tenders in the air fryer and dips them. It’s pretty delicious

I used to ask for extra sauce and extra pickles in my 95c McD’s hamburger because they were the only ingredients that had any flavour at all

But mayo on felafel sounds not ideal. I was just lamenting the other day that my home town’s original kebab shop was run by a couple of Turkish guys and the only sauce options were mild chilli, hot chilli and garlic yoghurt, and I miss that. Kebab shops now will put French fries and ketchup in a kebab. Why

i put the mayo on privately in my kitchen after taking the falaffel home. sonia can never know my secret

that's like getting a steak and taking it home and taking a dump on it

just disrespectful

Loving how ovary and vixnix both spelled falafel wrong, but differently

I don't often eat mustard, but I bought a hot dog at a carnival yesterday with ketchup, mustard, and fried onions. It was very nice. It cost £6, but it was really £7 as I had to pay a pound to get into the fairground area where the hot dog stand was based.

I was mostly at the carnival because my sister was in one of the floats dressed as an Avatar character.

Can we talk abt something else this is a gross topic find god with your mayo shit yuck

i just rubbed mayo all over my dick

I joke about not liking certain condiments or foods (as I assume we all are), but in reality, I've never understood anyone who legitimately, non-ironically gets upset by what somebody else chooses to put into their own stomach.

Like, when people (not just as a joke), act like it's disrespectful to add more sauce on a certain dish or to season something differently from how the chef intended. Like, if it's my taste buds the food is touching, then I can do what I damn well please with it.

In fact, just to prove a point, I will go to the most renowned sushi restaurant in all of Japan, whose head chef is the most respected living master of sushi, and I will put ginger (that's supposed to be a palette cleanser between pieces) on the fucking fish.

Scratch that. I will put ketchup on the fish. The green kind Heinz sells as a limited-edition novelty item.

And I will look that chef, who had to spend ten years learning how to make the tomago, directly in the eye as he is forced watch me chow down that corrupted fish. Maybe he will cry a little.

And I will leave a tip even though it's not even America.

My mom and her brother didn't talk for over 10 years because he made fun of her for eating cottage cheese at a ball game instead of a hot dog or whatever.

They hated each other anyway, but that particular instance was a definite final straw. He died recently. So remember, your hilarious insults towards someone's terrible food preferences could become a person's last memory of you. Be careful!

Oh yeah that ginger is delicious. I mix wasabi with soy sauce, dunk the sashimi or sushi in it, whack a slice of that ginger on top and then eat the whole thing in one mouthful. Delicious

I don’t really get bent out of shape by adding fries and ketchup to a kebab but falafel is pretty delicious on its own, it just seems like a waste

Maybe somebody feels that way about McD’s hamburger patties and buns, I dunno

Anything is possible

Because we live in a cringe food culture where you are actively encouraged to destroy your physique, mental health, and future through diet alone. It’s so engrained in day to day life that people immediately get frustrated if you suggest that you are unwilling to eat whatever trendy Grimace crap the corporation decided to put out for your gluttonous behaviors this week.

The same goes for alcohol. I constantly hear people talking high and mighty over the fact that they *only* drink alcohol and don’t touch the ‘harder stuff’ (usually including weed in that category) and I just worry about how they are aging

There's an equally large and vocal movement that is the exact opposite, and it seems like you might be familiar with that.

no, they do not. it's not used in the same context as any of that stuff. i mean, in what world do we put ketchup, mustard, and/or mayo on a taco?

who do you know that actually has gotten frustrated over another person not wanting to eat McDonald's? Get out of town.

Happy genocide and colonialism day!

That’s the flag of Liberia. pic.twitter.com/YMVCWtZibm

— Andrew Wortman 🟧 (@AmoneyResists) July 4, 2023

:rofl:

If it wasn't so sad, it'd be funny

I might have that backwards

more importantly, it was my bday

(minus quite a few of those years, obv)

but I happily share it w/ the nation of Liberia

lol @ affluent honkies in north america denouncing colonialism and caucasians trying to blast one another for being so caucasian on the 4th of july. y'all keep me young

My neighbors had probably $500 worth of fireworks and my kids and I had a great fucking time at their party. Humanity is so fucked up in all directions that I just try to enjoy the fun parts.

Happy birthday, JoBerg!