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-   -   Rolling "Shits Recently Taken" Thread (http://forums.netphoria.org/showthread.php?t=159238)

FoolofaTook 12-23-2016 07:23 AM

So like at work we have one little bathroom that we share. Sometimes I go in there and well I love these ladies to death I really do but it reeks like the nethermost midden heap of Calcutta. Its literally brought tears to my eyes yo. My guess would be that their latino diet so heavy on beans helps foster this miasma in their bowels.

i ain't no racist tho. us south slavs eat pasujl (chili) and kiseli kupus (sauer kraut) all winterlong so we too fart like lords of flatulence.

run2pee 12-23-2016 11:02 AM

Took u should buy them some poo pouri for christmas they'll love u forever

run2pee 12-23-2016 11:04 AM

Y'all ever spray some poo pouri? I am not affiliated with them in any fashion other than a regular every day fella who likes to hide the smells of his poo's

"A spray b4 u go & nobody will even ever know"

Combined with liberal flushing, it's truly changed my fecal/olfactory game

ohnoitsbonnie 12-23-2016 11:06 AM

Yes. I ignore it. Shit is gonna stink at first and then after flushing and waiting 5 min it'll be like nothing happened.

run2pee 12-23-2016 11:06 AM

Just looka them bottles u love it u want it

run2pee 12-23-2016 11:11 AM

promoting synergistic, holistic pooflow optimization

CREATING VALUES

run2pee 12-23-2016 11:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ohnoitsbonnie (Post 4304464)
Yes. I ignore it. Shit is gonna stink at first and then after flushing and waiting 5 min it'll be like nothing happened.

Maybe 4 u but the ladies our dear took so painstakingly evoked are in need of some extra help

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 09:25 PM

The employee bathroom where I work has an apple cinnamon air freshener that the ladies I work with use whenever they drop anchor. It always smells like somebody farted into a muffin whenever I go in there.

FoolofaTook 12-23-2016 10:01 PM

Drop anchor heh.

there's a bottle of febreeze but sometimes it isn't used. so i go in there gasping and gagging amd spraying febreeze like a madman and then further choking on the noxious. chemicals and rectal gases.

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 10:06 PM

Men's poop smells like this, but women's poop smells like this

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 10:06 PM

Know what I mean, fellas?

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 10:07 PM

I've been so regular this week. It's been glorious. Twice a day. This must be what normal people feel like.

ohnoitsbonnie 12-23-2016 10:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FlamingGlobes (Post 4304570)
Men's poop smells like this, but women's poop smells like this

Ajde

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 10:42 PM

Is this the only thread you won't post pics in or what?

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 10:42 PM

I dare you to post a pic in this thread!

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 10:42 PM

Hell, I dare anybody to post a pic of their recent shit

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 10:43 PM

#MakeNetphoriaGreatAgain

ohnoitsbonnie 12-23-2016 10:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by FlamingGlobes (Post 4304627)
Is this the only thread you won't post pics in or what?

I didn't even post in it until recently. Poop descriptions are only for sharing with loved ones. I don't really want there to be a lingering record of my bowel movements to ruminate on at this point in my life

redbreegull 12-23-2016 10:45 PM

I recently took a shit that looked like steve bannon

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ohnoitsbonnie (Post 4304634)
I didn't even post in it until recently. Poop descriptions are only for sharing with loved ones. I don't really want there to be a lingering record of my bowel movements to ruminate on at this point in my life

I guess my posts in this thread are my way of saying I love all of you.

FlamingGlobes 12-23-2016 10:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by redbreegull (Post 4304635)
I recently took a shit that looked like steve bannon

As have all of us

ohnoitsbonnie 12-25-2016 12:16 PM

Let it be confirmed that i poop and also that they (the poops) look like demons

FlamingGlobes 12-26-2016 07:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ohnoitsbonnie (Post 4305062)
Let it be confirmed that i poop and also that they (the poops) look like demons

pics or GTFO

reprise85 04-29-2017 02:01 PM

'bout that time again

reprise85 04-29-2017 02:02 PM

for reference:

reprise85 04-29-2017 02:03 PM

i had a ton of insoluble fiber yesterday so i'm just preparing myself. had a 2 earlier

redbreegull 04-29-2017 02:04 PM

yesterday I ate a huge gyro and some falafel. let's see where this takes us

FlamingGlobes 04-29-2017 03:54 PM

I've been so regular lately that I'm worried I'm going to become known as "the guy who stinks up the employee bathroom at 10:20 every morning" at work.

reprise85 04-29-2017 04:06 PM

i farted at work today (it was a combo sneeze/fart, is there a name for those?) but it was a total sbd but luckily we keep air freshener in the front office and i was able to grab it at the first sniff of yuck. generally it's for stinky customers. my coworker was standing right there and did not seem to catch on to why i used the spray

reprise85 04-29-2017 04:08 PM

apparently the word is 'snart'

Trotskilicious 04-29-2017 04:39 PM

i wish there was a mute button for entire threads, this is embarassing

smashingjj 04-29-2017 05:05 PM

it is the shits recently taken thread, what did you expect

smashingjj 04-29-2017 05:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by reprise85 (Post 4350278)
i farted at work today (it was a combo sneeze/fart, is there a name for those?) but it was a total sbd but luckily we keep air freshener in the front office and i was able to grab it at the first sniff of yuck. generally it's for stinky customers. my coworker was standing right there and did not seem to catch on to why i used the spray

I actually said 'snart' aloud half a second before I saw it was your next post

reprise85 04-29-2017 05:07 PM

shit happens

redbreegull 04-29-2017 05:12 PM

Hey Dr. Reprise I need to consult you on poop. As I've discussed here previously, I have a dysfunctional/sensitive digestive system and I get a lot weird shits and intestinal cramps and stuff. It usually comes in waves, like I will experience it every day for 2 weeks and then I will be fine for awhile. Last year the IRL doctor said I had IBS which I figured, and the hypothesis we came up with is that it is anxiety-induced.

However, I'm not so sure now. Over the last 6 weeks I have been feeling worse than I have in a long time, and drinking almost every night. But my stomach has been fine. Wtf? What else could be triggering this randomly and making it last for weeks at a time? That doesn't sound diet-related?

Trotskilicious 04-29-2017 05:17 PM

are you eating plants and i mean like 2-3 cups of plants a day at least, because i bet you aren't

redbreegull 04-29-2017 05:22 PM

My diet is mostly vegetarian. I eat fresh fruits and veggies every day :(

Trotskilicious 04-29-2017 05:23 PM

oh well i gues you'er dying

redbreegull 04-29-2017 05:25 PM

do you think I have the imaginary gluten disease

Trotskilicious 04-29-2017 05:25 PM

yes


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