Vending Machines

Toby · 01-22-2004, 09:32 PM

It never fails.

- I have one dollar in my wallet
- I am starving

So I went to the vending machine, really unsure of what I wanted. I thought about getting one of those new hershey smore candy bars, but I figured since I only had one dollar I mgiht as well get a bag of pretzles to hold me over until I get home. I stuck in my money and just as it was about to drop my bag of pretzles got stuck on the fucking twisting mechanisim or whatever. Now some lucky bastard is going to get TWO bags of pretzles and I am stuck here to starve until 10pm. Fuck

mirrar · 01-22-2004, 09:34 PM

shake the machine. or tilt it forward and yerfood will fall out. one time last year my chips got stuck in the machine and the entire mens hockey team ran to my rescue and slammed into it, and we got a LOT of free canday

DevilSaint · 01-22-2004, 09:36 PM

Yea, show that vending machine who's boss. Don't let it fuck you over like that. Muscle it up a bit.

Toby · 01-22-2004, 09:36 PM

You can't shake this machines too much because they have some kind of alarm on them that goes off when you get too rough with it. Trust me I shook as much I could without the alarm going off :erm

Logan12 · 01-22-2004, 09:48 PM

NOoooooo poor Toby I so sorry

Toby · 01-22-2004, 09:49 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Logan12
NOoooooo poor Toby I so sorry

I got some oatmeal cookies at my house waiting for me

murgle · 01-22-2004, 09:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Toby
I got some oatmeal cookies at my house waiting for me

I love oatmeal cookies. I had some out of the vending machine last night. I want home-made oatmeal cookies.. mm..

mxzombie · 01-22-2004, 10:01 PM

this is why i hate vending machines. it's embarrassing cause i'm weak as fuck and couldn't shake whatever it is out of the vending machine. i always bring someone with me when i go to one.

Nimrod's Son · 01-22-2004, 10:03 PM

So what if the alarm goes off? Maybe someone will help you get the fucking pretzels you paid for.

Toby · 01-22-2004, 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Nimrod's Son
So what if the alarm goes off? Maybe someone will help you get the fucking pretzels you paid for.

I'm scared of the police. I might have a bench warrant

Nimrod's Son · 01-22-2004, 10:22 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Toby
I'm scared of the police. I might have a bench warrant

Wait, this alarm- it summons the police?

Toby · 01-22-2004, 10:23 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Nimrod's Son
Wait, this alarm- it summons the police?

public safety =- O

murgle · 01-22-2004, 10:24 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Toby
I'm scared of the police. I might have a bench warrant

1- what's a bench warrant?
2- why does it call the police? is there a vending-machine theft ring going around? it should signal an office or at WORST campus police....

Grammar Deputy · 10:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Logan12
NOoooooo poor Toby I so sorry

Dear Logan12,
I read your post, and I wanted to try and fix it for you. Here is the correct version:

Oh no! Poor Toby. I am so sorry.

Have a good day.
~Grammar

Toby · 01-22-2004, 10:32 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Grammar Deputy

Dear Logen12,
I read your post, and I wanted to try and fix it for you. Here is the correct version:

Oh no! Poor Toby. I am so sorry.

Have a good day.
~Grammar

Dear Grammar Deputy,
I saw your post and noticed that you spelled Logan incorrectly. I thought I would bring it to your attention.

Always,
Toby

sickbadthing · 01-22-2004, 10:32 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Toby
I'm scared of the police. I might have a bench warrant

Get that shit fixed. You'll regret it later if you don't.

Toby · 01-22-2004, 10:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by sickbadthing

Get that shit fixed. You'll regret it later if you don't.

calling the courthouse tomorow

Grammar Deputy · 01-22-2004, 10:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Toby
Dear Grammar Deputy,
I saw your post and noticed that you spelled Logan incorrectly. I thought I would bring it to your attention.

Always,
Toby

Thank you so very much about the mistake. I hope my boss does not catch it.
~Grammar

01-22-2004, 10:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Grammar Deputy

Thank you so very much about the mistake. I hope my boss does not catch it.
~Grammar

You're fired. Please turn in your badge and pun.

Grammar Deputy · 01-22-2004, 10:38 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Grammar PoIice
You're fired. Please turn in your badge and pun.

But sir, it was only one, little mistake. Please do not fire me. This job is all I have.
Afterall, I am only a Deputy. Are I not entitled to a few mistakes?

~Grammar

Grammar S.W.A.T · 01-23-2004, 12:05 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Grammar PoIice
You're fired. Please turn in your badge and pun.

About time someone in this two-bit department showed some fucking initiative. Oh wait, I'm sorry; I meant PROFESSIONAL COMPETENCE. I don't want to see his ass within 10 FEET of the firing range while I'm there, or there may be a short lesson on FUCKING PUNCTUATION.

01-22-2004, 10:03 PM	#9
Nimrod's Son Master of Karate and Friendship Location: in your butt Posts: 72,943	So what if the alarm goes off? Maybe someone will help you get the fucking pretzels you paid for. __________________ - Nimrod's Son: Problem Solver!

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01-22-2004, 09:34 PM	#2
mirrar Braindead Location: in our bedroom, after the war. Posts: 19,826	shake the machine. or tilt it forward and yerfood will fall out. one time last year my chips got stuck in the machine and the entire mens hockey team ran to my rescue and slammed into it, and we got a LOT of free canday

01-22-2004, 09:36 PM	#3
DevilSaint Apocalyptic Poster Location: Not Here Anymore Posts: 1,612	Yea, show that vending machine who's boss. Don't let it fuck you over like that. Muscle it up a bit.

01-22-2004, 09:36 PM	#4
Toby Just Hook it to My Veins! Location: the mtns Posts: 43,034	You can't shake this machines too much because they have some kind of alarm on them that goes off when you get too rough with it. Trust me I shook as much I could without the alarm going off :erm

01-22-2004, 09:48 PM	#5
Logan12 Ownz Location: Trippin' On A Hole In A Paper Heart Posts: 922	NOoooooo poor Toby I so sorry

01-22-2004, 10:01 PM	#8
mxzombie Braindead Location: i like traffic lights, but only when they're green. Posts: 15,578	this is why i hate vending machines. it's embarrassing cause i'm weak as fuck and couldn't shake whatever it is out of the vending machine. i always bring someone with me when i go to one.