Netphorians no one has slept with

[fuzzyroes]

[fuzzyroes]

haha oh man, I'm actually cracking up, that's gold

[redbreegull]

oh look it's I dropped out of high school squad

[fuzzyroes]

Originally Posted by teh b0lly!!1

i have been having a strange couple of days. i didn't realize it at the time but i'm pretty sure i got a little bit too fucked up during new years.

sorry for the posts in this thread, they were terrible.
i think i need to chill for a while.

awhh come on man, where's the deetz?

[buzzard]

Standing idly by as our ambassador to Israel is barred and sanctions are imposed upon us appears to have sapped his energy.

[teh b0lly!!1]

these two days have been absolutely surreal. and what's even more confusing is that i feel fine, but i find myself doing strange things. from my external behavior i can see i'm not there, but i feel more or less okay. this is even more freaky than just being 'properly' messed up.

i'm gonna take a good few days to clean up and get back to normal. hopefully. i'm kinda freaked out atm to be honest.

[fuzzyroes]

Come on man, don't leave us hanging! Dish us the dirt!

[buzzard]

Why are you breathing manually, though?

[redbreegull]

Originally Posted by teh b0lly!!1

these two days have been absolutely surreal. and what's even more confusing is that i feel fine, but i find myself doing strange things. from my external behavior i can see i'm not there, but i feel more or less okay. this is even more freaky than just being 'properly' messed up.

i'm gonna take a good few days to clean up and get back to normal. hopefully. i'm kinda freaked out atm to be honest.

this sounds a lot like when I drank for three days straight and had a dissociative experience. I also felt "fine," like weirdly warm and content like I was watching things from outside by body or something and everything in life just seemed perfectly adequate despite how weird the experience was

it took me a few days before I felt totally normal but everything was ok. I think it was just an anxiety response fueled by incredible amounts of weed and booze. didn't drink for a good awhile after that

[LaBelle]

I've gotten to the point where I felt like I was watching me do dumb stuff i'd never normally do and had little to no agency in it. But I didn't have anything other than a weird mix of drinks.

[yo soy el mejor]

redbreegull talking about sex makes it sound boring and awkward.

/shudder

[FlamingGlobes]

Originally Posted by yo soy el mejor

redbreegull talking about sex makes it sound boring and awkward.

/shudder

What if someone else talked about sex? Maybe fuzzy? Would that make you feel better??

[ohnoitsbonnie]

He'd just say he fucked a chick in the pussy and as long as it was consensual, she was paid for her time and he wore a condom it would be fine

[Run To Me]

Originally Posted by Poots

the way rgb writes about sex is like he's had actual intercourse like seven times in his life and it was"so rad you guys just don't even understand, it's like, we were fucking, you know"

I will confess I got a good chuckle outta the one where he puked on the lady. And the one where she said "harder if you are able"

In fact my whole family still laffs about these, around the table, at dinner sometimes

[Ihaguitar]

I'm trying to find a chick on craigslist to sleep with....

[FlamingGlobes]

"Harder if you are able"? Is that a thing? Like, was it literally said that way during intercourse?

[FlamingGlobes]

Originally Posted by Ihaguitar

I'm trying to find a chick on craigslist to sleep with....

And Ihaguitar was never heard from again.

[FlamingGlobes]

Originally Posted by ohnoitsbonnie

He'd just say he fucked a chick in the pussy and as long as it was consensual, she was paid for her time and he wore a condom it would be fine

He was drunk at the time, so the details are fuzzy.

[FlamingGlobes]

[Run To Me]

Originally Posted by Ihaguitar

I'm trying to find a chick on craigslist to sleep with....

Post your ad and we'll critique it for you

Keep us updated

[ohnoitsbonnie]

Originally Posted by Ihaguitar

I'm trying to find a chick on craigslist to sleep with....

Nobody will ever answer your ad js

[redbreegull]

Originally Posted by Run To Me

I will confess I got a good chuckle outta the one where he puked on the lady.

I didn't puke on her, I made it to the toilet. I was not in good shape at the time and she liked to take showers in what to me was scalding hot water. Trying to have sex in that temperature fatigued me to the point of vomiting.

/humblebrag

[ohnoitsbonnie]

Did she have drrrrrrrryyyyy skin

[ohnoitsbonnie]

I would. A scalding hot shower can be nice until you get out and dry off and your skin cracks up. Also water is not a good lube and I don't have a shower stall with seat so shower sex with penetration isn't fun

[wHATcOLOR]

Originally Posted by redbreegull

The only reason I even tried to describe it was because bonnie asked me what made it so good. Sorry some people find it impossible to understand that something not as important to them could truly be so important to someone else, but that's not my shortcoming.

this place has always had a puritanical streak, like talking or thinking about sex too much is bad

reminds me of the trots/eulogy days

Well for my part I enjoyed the memory it brought up of Ella's post, and there wasn't any judgement

[Run To Me]

Yeah shower sex that isn't oral sex has never made much sense 2 me

[ohnoitsbonnie]

Originally Posted by Run To Me

Yeah shower sex that isn't oral sex has never made much sense 2 me

We are making break thrus here

[ohnoitsbonnie]

Originally Posted by wHATcOLOR

Well for my part I enjoyed the memory it brought up of Ella's post, and there wasn't any judgement

Ella is a little housewife with step kids now and maybe a biological one too (can't remember). It happened so quickly

[MyOneAndOnly]

Originally Posted by ohnoitsbonnie

He'd just say he fucked a chick in the pussy and as long as it was consensual, she was paid for her time and he wore a condom it would be fine

it would be fine

[redbreegull]

Originally Posted by ohnoitsbonnie

I would. A scalding hot shower can be nice until you get out and dry off and your skin cracks up. Also water is not a good lube and I don't have a shower stall with seat so shower sex with penetration isn't fun

I always thought I liked hot showers but nothing compared to how hot she turned it up. She was a big fan of standing shower sex. It wasn't as good for me.

Originally Posted by Run To Me

Yeah shower sex that isn't oral sex has never made much sense 2 me

honestly how do you do this without accidentally swallowing/inhaling water? Do you guys have huge showers?