Your Facebook Friends List's Idea of Humour

[The exploding boy]

theres nothing that i hate more then when they have babies or children act or speak like adults. Its a popular one in commercials. Its lazy, unfunny, and sometimes even downright creepy.

[The exploding boy]

also like i'm supposed to believe she really writes her whole routine. I mean i haven't seen it, but i really fucking doubt it. Because let me tell you something, ten years old are only ever funny to other ten years old. Or to their parents. And sometimes yeah maybe actually funny...but by accident.

[Disco King]

Originally Posted by hnibos

Pedo jokes won't get you anywhere around here. It horrified these people, ok?

I'm kind of kicking myself for not making a more nuanced Jared Fogle joke. I'm firing the guy who writes my monologues.

[Disco King]

Originally Posted by The exploding boy

theres nothing that i hate more then when they have babies or children act or speak like adults. Its a popular one in commercials. Its lazy, unfunny, and sometimes even downright creepy.

I also hate when commercials try to use the "cute child saying something adorably childlike" trope. I dunno, something just seems extra cynical about getting children to rehearse youthful innocence to sell a product. And children haven't yet developed the skills to be good actors, so it always comes out feeling so contrived, anyway.

[The exploding boy]

YES.

engineered cuteness isn't cute. Nothing can be cute if it knows it's being cute. Thats why animals are cute.


though i know my cats sometimes are cute on purpose...

[redbreegull]

do you guys work with children by chance? because hatred of this shit is totally something that happens when you work with kids

[The exploding boy]

no. I havent been near a kid in years.





(judge said i couldn't)

[The exploding boy]

but for srs i haven't. just cause i don't know anyone who has them. Try not to also...

ok well i dont know anyone..but like if i did...

[D.]

Originally Posted by redbreegull

some people have those apps that post how far they ran and what route they took. it is annoying. in general I don't understand when people want to post daily routine stuff on facebook. I did make one workout status once though, but it was only because I had drunk a bunch of margaritas and then went for an epic run in the dark

Yeah see i figure any annoying post can be made 100% better if it has even a slightly humorous or novel approach. As long as it doesnt veer into self aware r/iamverysmart territory

[Trotskilicious]

d stop making reddit references

[Shallowed]

Yeah, people are trying to talk about Facebook in here

[Trotskilicious]

i have to admit there's good stuff on that one

[Trotskilicious]

[Cool As Ice Cream]

lol
it defines that forever exists
bahahaha

[The exploding boy]

I like to quote myself

- me

[slunken]

Originally Posted by redbreegull

do you guys work with children by chance? because hatred of this shit is totally something that happens when you work with kids

i work with people that have the mental capacity of retarded children.

[Trotskilicious]

waitstaff?

[slunken]

i stopped working at the restaurant more than 2 years ago. i'm back doing design and screenprinting.

[Trotskilicious]

i thought that was the case but when you said you work with retarded children, well, i immediately thought of that

[slunken]

we hire a lot of temps that require special skills such as being able to count to 12 and multiply by 12

[Trotskilicious]

i can't multiply by 12 in my head

[slunken]

i don't multiply by 12 but it seems fairly easy to remember the sequence of numbers based on 12

for example i couldn't tell you what 5.75 by 12 is but i can remember 12, 24, 36, 48 etc or at least write that sequence down somewhere for reference but i don't think some of these people can read or write sometimes

[Trotskilicious]

i don't know can i use my calculator

[slunken]

most people probably don't even realize their pocket facebookers have a calculator

[redbreegull]

Originally Posted by D.

Yeah see i figure any annoying post can be made 100% better if it has even a slightly humorous or novel approach.

especially if the story has some kind of self-deprecating aspect, that shit always does well on facebook.

[redbreegull]

one annoying kind of post that I just don't get though is, "omg I am so upset/angry/depressed/sad," or "just had the worst day ever/the worst thing ever just happened to me," without any further explanation. I would think people that post things like this would revel in their friends rushing to their side frantically asking "what's wrong?" "omg what happened?" "are you alright?? message me if you need to talk," and maybe this is just the people on my feed, but they usually then refuse to elaborate. "don't feel like talking about it." Like what is the motivation for that? It just makes you feel validated to see other people worry I guess?

[Trotskilicious]

because you WANT the ims, or its some cryptic passive aggressiveness

mentally ill ppl have made those posts before on my feed, they get no replys. something bad happens to happyface mcpositivethinking FOR ONCE the get 70 responses

why am i not deleting this shit

[redbreegull]

I watched a dude give a Ted talk-like presentation on how we can build better narratives for our lives and how that can blah blah etc but one thing he talked about that I didn't consider exactly in this way before is that a status or social media post is a narrative like any other. If you write a narrative that engages people and speaks to them, you will get likes and comments. Writing something impassioned or heartfelt or true doesn't necessarily make a good narrative, and people don't feel like "I had the worst day of my life" is a worthwhile narrative, and it is why certain kinds of statuses seem to be ubiquitously disdained, except for all the people who inexplicably keep posting them.

[Disco King]

My philosophy is that, if I'm going to post something on social media, it's going to be something that I have a reasonable expectation would be of interest to other people, instead of it just being for the sake of my wanking myself. The kind of link I might follow if somebody else posted it, or the kind of joke somebody might actually enjoy. Not some inside joke I share with myself, or things that only interest me that I have no reason to think would interest anyone else. If you're sharing something, it's for other people. Nobody brings a single can of Pepsi that's already been opened to a potluck.

[buzzard]

Bringing Pepsi to anything would be a shitty move.