Clothes

[pavementtune]

I get like that at car dealers and rentals. And wine stores. Basically when I feel insecure like I don't belong there and think the salesperson can see it on my forehead and I'm an easy target to sell me anything.

[vixnix]

yeah that sounds about exactly right

which only confirms my suspicions that they're hardly trying to help me!!

[sppunk]

Originally Posted by vixnix

they're actually helping themselves...to my money. I don't need their help! I'm fine working things out for myself. And if I did need help I wouldn't ask for it from someone with a vested interest in me spending money... :/

So if you need help at a grocery or hardware store you ask a random stranger and not an employee. Good life you live.

[bignothing]

yeah I'm with vixnix on this one. If I go with a friend, then yeah no big deal, but if I'm shopping alone it generally means I wanna wander around and not talk to anyone/feel pressure.

Also, lol, yeah sure, looks great:

[vixnix]

Except that my Confucian hatred for merchants just makes me clam up and go cold and run away rather than hand my money over

I think the fact that the salespeople in boutique stores remind me of the nastiest kind of girl from my all girls high school doesn't help them much. I don't feel any sympathy for them if they put the pressure on

[vixnix]

oh well hardware and groceries are different - my Dad had a workshop full of tools and enjoyed carpentry so I know I can always ask him, and I don't need any help with groceries, but grocery store employees aren't paid on commission so I wouldn't mind asking them anyway

[sppunk]

Originally Posted by vixnix

oh well hardware and groceries are different - my Dad had a workshop full of tools and enjoyed carpentry so I know I can always ask him, and I don't need any help with groceries, but grocery store employees aren't paid on commission so I wouldn't mind asking them anyway

Many boutiques are commission-based.

[The exploding boy]

I never ask for help anywhere and if offered, I don't take it. But that might be a social anxiety problem. If I can't find it, too fucking bad. Going home empty handed.


But yeah I hate pressure sales. A few months back my modem stops working, I call Bell, they tell me to go pick a new power cable at one of their stores. So I go. I tell some girl employee why I'm there, they told me to just mention my name and theyd give me the cable. Right. She looks up my account. And then she launches into it, trying to sell me a new service blahblah, I don't say yes to these thigns without having weighed the pros and cons at home becaue in the middle of all this pressuring I can't do it, so basically im like uhuhuh waiting for her to finish and then say no thanks but she won't stop. Obviously she can see I'm a bit of a passive weakling. At some point finally I decide to assert myself and just say "Can I just get my cable and go home?" she stops and smiles awkwardly and says "Oh well sure, if you want to keep paying more that's your right"

Bullshit, turns out i'd have paid the same monthly for a slightly faster service sure (which I don't need) BUT it would have cost me 100$ to have it installed

[The exploding boy]

Originally Posted by duovamp

I don't like him because of his low post count.

Its true I may have too much time on my hands. I( was the first to break 10 000 and 20 000 posts. It's sad that I remember it but that's just the truth (in like 2 years too...). another reason why people didn't like me of course. I'm guessing somewhere there was a switch because when I came back for a short bit in 2006 my post count was under 500.

[Trotskilicious]

Originally Posted by sppunk

So if you need help at a grocery or hardware store you ask a random stranger and not an employee. Good life you live.

seriously she's so goddamn deranged it's incredible

[Trotskilicious]

Originally Posted by sppunk

Many boutiques are commission-based.

and most retail seems to be hourly but that's america innit?

[vixnix]

Originally Posted by sppunk

Many boutiques are commission-based.

this is what I'm saying though...they have a vested interest in me buying something. so it's not really help...it's persuasion, or whatever. Pavement is right - they mark me as an easy sale because they know I'm going to be self conscious about my appearance, and then because those kinds of womens' clothes stores hire the sort of skinny, attractive girl that spent all of high school looking down her nose at me and raising her eyebrows at my clothing choices, they play on that dynamic to let me know how pathetic I am and how much I need their help

department store girls are actually really nice, because they're usually paid a much better hourly rate, and they have a higher turnover anyway because of all the time poor regular customers like me. Plus for bras, especially sports bras, you can't beat having someone who can measure and fit you properly, and can then offer you choices across a range of different brands so that you can compare them all in the one fitting. You'd have to get a dresser/shopper for that kind of service, otherwise..

[Trotskilicious]

well if you weren't so neurotic maybe you'd be able to go "no i just want the scarf" and be done with it

or maybe you'd just have a conversation with them

i mean i'm pretty much an anti social asshole but i can even deal with sales people and store help without having some kind of neurotic meltdown

[vixnix]

yeah I can't - I can't deal with beggars or charity collectors either. or wait staff. my visit to the US was a total nightmare for me. I was broke the whole time I was there because people either kept asking for my money or asking me to spend it and I was like a lamb to the slaughter

[vixnix]

here in the southern hemisphere our beggars sit quietly with signs made from cardboard and hats put in front of them, so it's much easier, but even then I can't walk past without putting something in

[sppunk]

Yet you complain about being poor.

[vixnix]

well how am I supposed to be rich with all of this damn foolery going on

[yo soy el mejor]

new clothes are fun, but they won't save you any money.

[yo soy el mejor]

i wear pants, sometimes i wear shorts, and occasionally i wear skirts. i'm crazy, y0.

[The exploding boy]

Originally Posted by vixnix

yeah I can't - I can't deal with beggars or charity collectors either.

Beggars I'm fine with if they don't look like people who aren't REALLY on the street. There's this epidemic of young people begging around here who look like they have homes and the mental means to get help, I mean its Canada, do you know how EASY it is to get welfare or any kind of help from the government here? Only the truly mentally affected people can't get any because they're too fucked to even know what to do, these are the beggars I feel sorry for, not you goddam hippies or kids who thought it would be cool to move to montreal and become a squeegee punk and yes some are running form a shit home life but seriously there's HUNDREDS of places you can go to get help here, that's all there is everywhere.

but fuck charity muggers hard. girlfriend went off on one of them twice for basically completely invading her personal space. They basically jump you or block your way and then don't get why that pisses you the fuck off. It was a sight to behold, I mean the abuse they had to endure from her (I'm a bit more passive about these kidn of thigns even if they piss me off). Cunts (general gender neutral usage here).

It's such a shit way to raise money too, basically just jump people and then pretty much abuse the meeker ones (or those in need of social interaction) into giving you money whether they really want to or not. I just look dour and give them a firm headshake no and hope to god they know better than to press on. One passively agressively once said after me "a smile would have been nice." I don't owe you a smile, if you can't take people being indifferent, nevermind mean to you, get another job you precious little flower. You wearing a Red Cross or Greenpeace logo on your shirt does not exempt you from blame or from being a dick.

[vixnix]

My parents made me walk on eggshells my whole life so I fear how people will take it if I say no. Classic people pleaser. I can resist bigger purchases pretty well (only from being burned before and having to live with it - yes, yes we do in fact have a $5k leather couch that was custom made in Italy before being shipped to NZ, that couldn't be moved into our tiny duplex without calling a glazier in to remove a window ) but smaller purchases...I mean basically if I can afford it and it seems like it would mean a lot to you if I gave you the money for it, it's yours.

Such a pushover like that. Which is why I favour big department stores where I'll blend in, or else thrift stores where the maximum amount I can be ripped off is low.

[Eulogy]

Trunk Club is too expensive for the most part but if you go to the physical location they give you free booze. I went armed with my tax return after not having bought non-work clothes in like two years and I had fun.

[The exploding boy]

There's people pressuring you to buy things in thrift stores? I've never experienced that and would probably laugh if I did.

[vixnix]

no but I do often feel guilty going in there and getting just one thing when in the back of my mind I feel like I could afford more and it's going to a good cause, plus I'm making an ecologically responsible choice by buying used things - so I usually put the pressure on myself, there.

[pavementtune]

You'd enjoy central Europe.
It's getting impossible to tell who is what. Local homeless, refugees, beggars from poorer countries, or organized crime. The organized ones often have babies and little kids with them. And their approach isn't asking for something, they demand €50, for a train ticket, to feed their kids. Say no and they follow you, argue and shout.

People tend to get really pissed off, and so other beggars, quietly sitting somewhere, don't get a penny either.

[vixnix]

have never been to central Europe and this information has cemented my leaning to never go. Previously I avoided it because of my lack of European language skills (other than English. I don't want to be all Anglotrash in Europe though. I know that's vain. I'm sorry).

[pavementtune]

It isn't fun. God damn EU without boarders. Of course people from areas with no economy and state support at all - like rural Romania, Bulgaria blabla etc.- get on trains and travel from city to city, begging.

Plus the 3000 refugees who make it to the Italian, French, or Spanish coast without drowning every other day. Can't blame those who leave the "transition camps."

And then the ugly kind, basically slavery. Amputees, mentally ill, women, traded from one Mercedes driving "owner" to the next, get jackshit from what they make on the streets and sleep 40 people in a cold one room dump.

The EU concept is a complete failure.

[reprise85]

I have a lot of black pants because I need them for work. I have two pairs of jeans (one black one blue). Then I have 5 or so pairs of other pants, a few could pass for "dress pants." I have two corduroy pants that I wear exclusively when I go to the laundromat because they already have bleach stains.

Then I have a bunch of solid color - mostly black but some bright colors - cheap t-shirts from Target. I have some nicer t-shirts (made of softer/thicker fabric) and long sleeve shirts that are mostly from thrift stores. Black or black/white a couple blue. I have some men's undershirts I wear under my work uniform so I can wear them for a few shifts and don't have to be constantly in the laundromat (sometimes I need to wash a few uniforms in the sink though). And I have 4 pairs of work uniforms.

For night clothes I have some misc. pajama bottoms (mostly mens) that I wear with either the t-shirt or undershirt I've already been wearing or I grab a clean shirt if I've been sweating or am in long sleeves etc.

I have some knock of converse shoes I wear at work, black "work" shoes I wear if my feet hurt (which hasn't happened in a while now), one pair of dress shoes and one pair of sandals.

I know you were all on the edge of your seats.

[Elphenor]

I always wear black jeans...

I think there are 3 ways to dress: Dressing to make your body look good, dressing to fit a certain style or scene, or dressing to be comfortable.

I'm for sure in the second.

[vixnix]

Originally Posted by pavementtune

It isn't fun. God damn EU without boarders. Of course people from areas with no economy and state support at all - like rural Romania, Bulgaria blabla etc.- get on trains and travel from city to city, begging.

Plus the 3000 refugees who make it to the Italian, French, or Spanish coast without drowning every other day. Can't blame those who leave the "transition camps."

And then the ugly kind, basically slavery. Amputees, mentally ill, women, traded from one Mercedes driving "owner" to the next, get jackshit from what they make on the streets and sleep 40 people in a cold one room dump.

The EU concept is a complete failure.

Yeah it does seem that way. I heard that Greece is like the warehouse for sex traffic victims and the areas near ports are full of concrete buildings with bars on the windows. Sounds totally disgusting. But you know on Facebook all you ever see is the photos of people in bikinis at Mykonos or whatever. So sad.