Should I send a fb msg to my unknown half brother?

[slunken]

i keep waiting for the part where you ask me to endorse a money order or something similar

[slunken]

"HI - I'VE BEEN CREEPING THE BOOK AND I AM PRETTY SURE YOU ARE MY HALF BROTHER. THOUGHTS?"

[slunken]

sent from my Verizon Blackberry Mobile

[obscured01]

Does it really? :/

[slunken]

it might, to some. i guess it depends on who is reading it and i don't know the intended sender. but my gut says spam. the receiver will be skimming crazily by "i was born in..."

[slunken]

i haven't been on fb for a really long time but i think short and succint (borderline rude) is the preferred methodolgy.

[slunken]

please don't take my advice

[obscured01]

But I feel like I should justify who I am by giving him that info. Should I not?

Hey I think you're my half brother? What's up?

I can't just do that.

[slunken]

don't doubt - just send it. you created it with pure intentions; it would be wrong to pick it apart. don't doubt yourself. the message is there.

[slunken]

but now you have to be careful about the time stamp and send it at a reasonable hour

[vixnix]

I think it sounds just right...doesn't sound like spam to me, especially with all the details.

[null123]

yeah send it

what's up with pavementtune

[vixnix]

I think sometimes my airy-fairy Anglo posts come across in a bad way to her because she's a native German speaker, and she has mischaracterized me a bit. She sent me some really nice messages a while back when I was feeling really down and then was really surprised that a person who felt crap about themselves would troll at netphoria. Maybe something like that. I can see how she thought I was a nice girl because she hadn't glimpsed my dead, black heart yet.

[Dead Frequency]

Well, you seem like a decent person vixnix but you do post some things that make me wanna punch a hole in the wall with my face and barf into it

[vixnix]

I have a pathological desire to inspire that in people. I am addicted to the pain and shame of being an object of contempt. It's all I really know and the familiarity offers what litle comfort there is for me in this world outside of binge eating.

Imagine getting a letter from me rather than Sarah. I mean who wouldn't want to know Sarah. Honestly she's one of the nicest people here.

[Dead Frequency]

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Inspire contempt? Like I says, I think you're a decent person.

[Dead Frequency]

Also Sarah, I understand the difficulty of the situation but it might be best to be simple on the initial introduction "Hi, my name is ___,(maiden name maybe) and this might be awkward but, I believe we are related and I would like to know more about my family, and maybe even one day meet our father ____ for the first time, I hope this message meets you well and would really like to hear from you."

And if you're doing this through facebook maybe change you're profile pic or whatever to any photographs you have of you and him, or him.

[reprise85]

only the first two sentences sound like they could be spam. maybe do the "my name is" one first and then work the first paragraph into the second one or after it.

it looks good just don't want them to read two lines and delete it esp if it goes in their "other" folder

or just send it like it is.

[Trotskilicious]

Originally Posted by Dead Frequency

make me wanna punch a hole in the wall with my face and barf into it

i love this

so much

[Mooney]

my girlfriend received a message from a half sister she didn't know existed. she doesn't know her dad at all, although i do think she knows his name. she wasn't creeped out by it or anything, just found out she had a half sister, and realized after looking through her facebook pictures that she is a dirty trollop.

[ohnoitsbonnie]

Originally Posted by pavementtune

Doesn't deserve her interest, huh? It's not about what he "deserves". Could you try to get out of your i-adore-my-daddy-so-much little corner and try to put yourself into the shoes of someone who never met her father?

Whatever, this is another one of those discussions where I"m likely to call you self-centered (amongst other things) down the line, vixey, so I'll drop out here.

Plus what her father "deserves" (why is it that people with a Christian background love this word so much...) in your or my opinion has very little to do with contacting her brother.

So annoying

[Bread Regal]

My father had a shortlived marriage before he married my mom, so it is conceivable that I might have a half-sibling, but I wouldn't really care to look for them. The main difference between your situation and mine is that I am the product of my dad's current marriage, and you're the product of your dad's former relationship. I think that difference is rather significant.

I personally would be much more receptive to something much shorter than your draft. Something like

"Hi,

You don't know me but I believe that you and I have the same father, which would make you and me half-siblings. [briefly summarize circumstances of your fathers departure here, with dates and locations.]

I've never reached out to my father's side of the family and I never knew him, and you're the first person I've contacted. I'm interested in getting to know my half brother, but only if that interest is reciprocated. If you are in fact my half-brother and want nothing to do with me, just as my father decided 30 years ago, then I respect your decision.

-obscured01"

I would remove where you volunteer all the information about yourself and your life. Maybe allude to the fact that you're healthy and financially secure or whatever and not trying to scam him out of a kidney or something.

[Trotskilicious]

HI

MY NAME IS BARRY AND I WOULD LIKE TO MAKE YOU AN OFFER

PLEASE ADVISE,
BARRY

[Orchestra]

Whats his name? I'll send it for you.

[obscured01]

Originally Posted by Bread Regal

My father had a shortlived marriage before he married my mom, so it is conceivable that I might have a half-sibling, but I wouldn't really care to look for them. The main difference between your situation and mine is that I am the product of my dad's current marriage, and you're the product of your dad's former relationship. I think that difference is rather significant.

I personally would be much more receptive to something much shorter than your draft. Something like

"Hi,

You don't know me but I believe that you and I have the same father, which would make you and me half-siblings. [briefly summarize circumstances of your fathers departure here, with dates and locations.]

I've never reached out to my father's side of the family and I never knew him, and you're the first person I've contacted. I'm interested in getting to know my half brother, but only if that interest is reciprocated. If you are in fact my half-brother and want nothing to do with me, just as my father decided 30 years ago, then I respect your decision.

-obscured01"

I would remove where you volunteer all the information about yourself and your life. Maybe allude to the fact that you're healthy and financially secure or whatever and not trying to scam him out of a kidney or something.

I really like what you wrote, and it gets the point across without being too wordy, which obviously I have that problem.

Thanks everyone for the advice. I think I'll use this and make it my own and send it. We'll see what happens.

[null123]

i have a half sister but she was put up for adoption before I was born. not 100% sure she knows I exist and I can't imagine contacting her

[obscured01]

I have no idea if he knows I exist either. I do want to at least make an attempt, especially before my father passes away. At least I can tell myself, hey I tried.

[null123]

true. I'm not criticizing, I think it's cool.

[obscured01]

Ok. I just sent it. I used a slightly edited version of Bread's (thanks that sounded so much better than mine). My heart's beating all fast. :/

[Mayfuck]

damn. let us know how it goes