Attention Southern Americans (NOT South Americans) - Page 4

Trotskilicious · 12-01-2006, 05:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mpp

obligatory sexist comment:

y'all should just settle this, not by argument and the usage of your pretty little heads, but instead an oral sex contest

on each other

on a webcam

at rhino's house

I whole heartedly endorse this proposal.

Trotskilicious · 12-01-2006, 05:34 PM

I knew someone from Panhandle Florida, she was very southern, and she called it "Lower Alabama" but the peninsula is not very southern at all since it's a retirement mecca.

bardy · 12-01-2006, 05:34 PM

yeah the panhandle I would consider southern, you are right

bardy · 12-01-2006, 05:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BlueStar

Columbus, GA and Charlottesville, VA

you were born in georgia but how long did you live there

and charlottesville is pretty and slow but I wouldnt consider it much of a stereotypical southern area... it's on the border.

Trotskilicious · 12-01-2006, 05:35 PM

there's a map of accents in my cultural geography text book, and based on the studies panhandle florida has more in common with eastern dialect than southern.

bardy · 12-01-2006, 05:36 PM

there is a lot of white trash in the panhandle though

bardy · 12-01-2006, 05:47 PM

From the Roanoke Times Thursday, October 26, 2006. :

Stylin' in RoVa
By Jerry Fuhrman

Tell me if you've heard this one before: Why wasn't Jesus Christ born in southern Virginia? Because they couldn't find three wise men or a virgin. Haven't heard that one? How about this: Where was the toothbrush invented? Southwest Virginia. If it had been invented in Northern Virginia it would have been called a teethbrush.

Had enough? Find this mildly offensive? Resent the subtle bigotry and air of condescension? It kinda makes you want to write a letter to the editor of The Roanoke Times and give him the what-for, doesn't it? Who does that hypocritically pious holier-than-thou columnist think he is? What, he thinks he writes for the Style section of The Washington Post?

Let me digress for just a moment. It's fair to assume that very few of you reading this (residing in Southwest Virginia and therefore being members of America's great unwashed and ill-educated) know that The Washington Post has a Style section. Look into it and you'd find that the paper actually has a whole staff of people who produce the aforementioned.

On any given day, you'll find articles in Style devoted to sightings of trend-setting Democratic politicians like Rahm Emanuel and Barack Obama, to the powerful and hip turning out at a Washington area society gala, to who's dating who and who's marrying who (or is it whom?) and who's dumping who and who was rumored to having been seen with whom, about haiku and jujitsu and kudzu and whether you too should parlez vous. You can read all about risotto, arugula and adobo and whether piquante is trendier than caliente. And don't get them started on the subject of merlot.

The Washington Post dedicates a whole section to such stuff.

Well, on Wednesday a week ago the staff got together and decided to devote a piece to southern Virginia. Actually it painted with a broad brush; it was about all of Virginia outside of hip and happenin' Northern Virginia, or NoVa as they seem to prefer to think of themselves. But the target was unmistakable. It was us. RoVa. The Rest of Virginia.

It wasn't what you might think the Style section of The Washington Post would be focused on, though. It wasn't about Southern cuisine or about the lifestyles of the area's rich and politically powerful. It had nothing to do with music or about our rich cultural heritage or about the historical significance of this proud region. It wasn't even one of those tiresome columns devoted to our majestic mountaintops with flower-festooned trails meandering through a veritable Garden of Eden.

No, the Style section staff of The Washington Post decided, for its own reasons, to belittle us. To poke fun at who we are, or, worse, at who they think we are. We were the butt of crude and unflattering jokes. I guess they were intended to be jokes. You decide. From "NoVa and RoVa: Welcome To A State of Disagreement":

• In NoVa, a lab is the family dog. In RoVa, a lab is the family meth business.

• In NoVa, a "fur piece" is something a woman wears on a special occasion. In RoVa, a "fur piece" is a unit of distance.

• In NoVa, they listen to NPR. In RoVa, they listen to the NRA.

And my personal favorite:

• In RoVa, they like freshly killed venison. In NoVa, they like Alfred, Lord Tennyson.

Tennyson? Ain't that that feller what cooks up the white lightnin' over in Stinkin' Crick? Or was he that snot-nosed pit crew chief for Dale Jarrett? I can't recollect but no, we don't be knowin' no Tennyson down these ways, dadgummit.

I know. About now you're asking yourself: What on Earth does this have to do with style? Well, some things never change. A hundred years ago minstrels would paint their faces black, dress up in antebellum garb and sing "Mammy" to amuse the cultured classes, in hopes of getting six bits thrown at them for the evening meal. This is no different. The Stylists at The Post just did the dressing and singing for us. You might think of it as "Hee Haw" redux.

In response, I relay this quote, from Alfred, Lord Tennyson: "No man ever got very high by pulling other people down."

BlueStar · 12-01-2006, 05:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bardy

you were born in georgia but how long did you live there

and charlottesville is pretty and slow but I wouldnt consider it much of a stereotypical southern area... it's on the border.

A couple of years.

BUT YOURE RIGHT, I DIDNT DRIVE THE 1-8 HOURS TO ANY OTHER PART OF THE STATE EVER.

bardy · 12-01-2006, 05:49 PM

you drive to go wine tasting

mpp · 12-01-2006, 05:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bardy

you drive to go wine tasting

man that's funny

oh and bluestar, because you were born that don't count

and charlottesville? nope...that's one of the most yankee southern towns ever...most people who live there suck and call UVA "The University"

gay!

BlueStar · 12-01-2006, 05:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bardy

you drive to go wine tasting

Yeah, now I do - since I now know better about where not to go. And you've only been to DC and "Northern" areas for field trips.

Growing up, my parents took us fucking everywhere. Every little plaque in every little small town in every state we lived in, we saw it. And now, I have lived in or visited every state except Maine and Alaska. And, oh yeah, I currently work in a position where I manage all 50 states. I have to know about every state, every county, every district, every little precinct. Ha, I win.

bardy · 12-01-2006, 05:55 PM

yeah UVA generally considers VT a bunch of rednecks

so anyway if NoVA and UVA and whatever else are goin gto make fun of southwest virginia for being rednecks they are in no right to claim being "southern" in any way shape or form when the time comes.

avian chaos · 12-01-2006, 06:14 PM

Anytime I hear the term "the deep South" I always think of jungles and Vietnam.

green chair · 12-01-2006, 06:15 PM

I guess it looks like I'm the only one around here who really knows what the real South is all about.

I lived for 18 years in DEEP SOUTH ALABAMA, where Atlanta is a "northern city".

Now I've lived in a few places, currently Baltimore and I can agree with Bardy and disagree with BlueStar about DC.

DC/Baltimore is a large, overpriced shit hole. But so are many places around the country.

Gotta be happy where you are.

As for as the original question, all the stereotypes are true, but those stereotypes pour forth into all states, contrary to what Mayfuck thinks. He's got this California state of mind, which is a little short sighted.

BlueStar · 12-01-2006, 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bardy

if NoVA and UVA and whatever else are goin gto make fun of southwest virginia for being rednecks they are in no right to claim being "southern" in any way shape or form when the time comes.

Tell that to the New Yorkers who live in DC.

Bottom line: DC is not Northern by any means. And as I have stated over and over again, DC is not Southern either (and most certainly not "deep South"). It is a mix of the two.

bardy · 12-01-2006, 06:25 PM

this is a biased opnion, but I think NoVA/DC wants to have the good qualities of being "southern" and the good qualities of being "northern" and accept none of the negatives associated with each.

green chair · 12-01-2006, 06:48 PM

DC is northern

DC is HELL OF A LOT more similar to NYC than Atlanta, anyone that says otherwise is 100% wrong.

Mayfuck · 12-01-2006, 07:16 PM

Good thread.

Also BlueStar is kinda dumb.

Nimrod's Son · 12-01-2006, 08:49 PM

25% Dixie. You are a dandy Yankee Doodle.

murgle · 12-01-2006, 11:23 PM

Prepare for a very long post here, in response to your question, Horseflyking.

Quote:

Originally Posted by bardy

I dont consider Texas southern.

We're our own special breed here in Texas. I don't have much of an accent, because my mom doesn't have one and I lived with her. That's not to say that parts of the state aren't really "country," but the DFW metroplex is as modern and normal as any city in the northeast.

There aren't too many heavy accents in the large cities, but go out into the country a bit and it's kind of scary

I will admit that when I go to my lakehouse (and I'm there for more than a day or two), I'll throw on my Texas accent so people don't look at me like an alien. (There's a store there called Brookshires. I pronounce it "brook-SHIRE," but everyone else says, "Brook-shures," so i change little stuff like that so I don't stick out. My grandparents used to live there, so I spent a good deal of time there) Sometimes, my accent will come out if I'm really tired or really angry. But I talk really fast, so that's very un-Texan.

Ummm.. the food is good! Come to the south! Avoid collard greens! haha. Chicken fried steak, cream gravy, mashed potatos, fresh veggies. That's not to say that you can't walk into (even a shitty local restaurant) and find good food on the menu: grilled chicken, shrimp, wine, etc. There's lots of good dining here. Many many upscale restaurants in the metro areas.

As far as outside the cities, a lot of the landscape is boring (to the south and west). If you're headed east, the landscape is pretty beautiful. Very green, very lush, lots of trees. cows.

I get really offended if anyone calls me "country" or anything similar. My boyfriend once said something to that effect and he didn't realize what he'd done. He's not from here, so he doesn't really understand that we Texans that AREN'T country/hicks get really touchy about the subject because of all the damned stereotypes about Texans being country and stupid. It's not true. We don't all have accents (although I do say "y'all"), we don't have trucks, ride horses, wear cowboy hats, herd cattle, have family in Big Oil, and have ranches.

I don't consider Texas to be part of the South. It's definitely it's own thing. That's not to say that there aren't southern influences (food, etc), but you can find stuff like that in the north, as well. Texas is also unique because of all the Mexican food and influences.

I sometimes get long-winded. Sorry.

murgle · 12-01-2006, 11:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aeroplane

i agree with the latter. i lived in northeast texas during my high school years and loved the food . though the accents (east texans have been studied for their distinct accents) got on my nerves until i got use to it. they made fun of me, calling me a brit and such.

where in Texas?

agenda suicide · 12-01-2006, 11:51 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trotskilicious

Texans are Texans, it's like a whole 'nother country!

basically.
Although I've had 239826982343454894 people ask me "are you from the north east?"
And when I was in England quite a few people were like "well you don't sound like you're from Texas..."
Apparently Texans are supposed to sound like bumblefuck hicks or something.

donnie darko · 12-01-2006, 11:59 PM

What happened to that boy?

Trotskilicious · 12-02-2006, 01:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by deathofromeo

basically.
Although I've had 239826982343454894 people ask me "are you from the north east?"
And when I was in England quite a few people were like "well you don't sound like you're from Texas..."
Apparently Texans are supposed to sound like bumblefuck hicks or something.

I said I was from texas to one fat nerdy gay new yorker and he said "Oh, I'm sorry," and then gave me some patronizing laugh. It was all I could do to kick him in the groin but I managed not to and say "I'm not."

We're all supposed to sound and dress like the cowboy on the Simpsons, you didn't get the memo?

monkeyfritters · 12-02-2006, 02:21 AM

DC isnt north or south. its BLACK.

monkeyfritters · 12-02-2006, 02:22 AM

geographically speaking, of course.

Nate the Grate · 12-02-2006, 02:51 AM

28% Dixie. Lucy, let's mate.

I got the question about italians correct!

murgle · 12-02-2006, 03:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Trotskilicious

I said I was from texas to one fat nerdy gay new yorker and he said "Oh, I'm sorry," and then gave me some patronizing laugh. It was all I could do to kick him in the groin but I managed not to and say "I'm not."

We're all supposed to sound and dress like the cowboy on the Simpsons, you didn't get the memo?

I've had people say, "I'm sorry" when i tell them I'm from Texas too. The shitty part is that most people who would say that have never been to Texas, or if they have, they've only been to the bumblefuck parts.

I'd have kicked him.

Ol' Couch Ass · 12-02-2006, 03:34 AM

I live in South Carolina and am not a big fan. I grew up in Florida which is basically a confused northern state with many elderly people.

I don't much care for the South. The term "slow witted southerner" rings true for me almost every day. There is a general attitude of "you aren't from around here are you boy" which I don't much care for.

I need to move up north or out west.

Trotskilicious · 12-02-2006, 03:39 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by monkeyfritters

DC isnt north or south. its BLACK.

I already said that but no one listened.

12-01-2006, 05:34 PM	#92
Trotskilicious Banned Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship. Posts: 39,602	I knew someone from Panhandle Florida, she was very southern, and she called it "Lower Alabama" but the peninsula is not very southern at all since it's a retirement mecca.

12-01-2006, 05:34 PM	#93
bardy Immortal Location: helllllloooooo!! Posts: 20,831	yeah the panhandle I would consider southern, you are right

12-01-2006, 05:35 PM	#95
Trotskilicious Banned Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship. Posts: 39,602	there's a map of accents in my cultural geography text book, and based on the studies panhandle florida has more in common with eastern dialect than southern.

12-01-2006, 05:36 PM	#96
bardy Immortal Location: helllllloooooo!! Posts: 20,831	there is a lot of white trash in the panhandle though

12-01-2006, 05:47 PM	#97
bardy Immortal Location: helllllloooooo!! Posts: 20,831	From the Roanoke Times Thursday, October 26, 2006. : Stylin' in RoVa By Jerry Fuhrman Tell me if you've heard this one before: Why wasn't Jesus Christ born in southern Virginia? Because they couldn't find three wise men or a virgin. Haven't heard that one? How about this: Where was the toothbrush invented? Southwest Virginia. If it had been invented in Northern Virginia it would have been called a teethbrush. Had enough? Find this mildly offensive? Resent the subtle bigotry and air of condescension? It kinda makes you want to write a letter to the editor of The Roanoke Times and give him the what-for, doesn't it? Who does that hypocritically pious holier-than-thou columnist think he is? What, he thinks he writes for the Style section of The Washington Post? Let me digress for just a moment. It's fair to assume that very few of you reading this (residing in Southwest Virginia and therefore being members of America's great unwashed and ill-educated) know that The Washington Post has a Style section. Look into it and you'd find that the paper actually has a whole staff of people who produce the aforementioned. On any given day, you'll find articles in Style devoted to sightings of trend-setting Democratic politicians like Rahm Emanuel and Barack Obama, to the powerful and hip turning out at a Washington area society gala, to who's dating who and who's marrying who (or is it whom?) and who's dumping who and who was rumored to having been seen with whom, about haiku and jujitsu and kudzu and whether you too should parlez vous. You can read all about risotto, arugula and adobo and whether piquante is trendier than caliente. And don't get them started on the subject of merlot. The Washington Post dedicates a whole section to such stuff. Well, on Wednesday a week ago the staff got together and decided to devote a piece to southern Virginia. Actually it painted with a broad brush; it was about all of Virginia outside of hip and happenin' Northern Virginia, or NoVa as they seem to prefer to think of themselves. But the target was unmistakable. It was us. RoVa. The Rest of Virginia. It wasn't what you might think the Style section of The Washington Post would be focused on, though. It wasn't about Southern cuisine or about the lifestyles of the area's rich and politically powerful. It had nothing to do with music or about our rich cultural heritage or about the historical significance of this proud region. It wasn't even one of those tiresome columns devoted to our majestic mountaintops with flower-festooned trails meandering through a veritable Garden of Eden. No, the Style section staff of The Washington Post decided, for its own reasons, to belittle us. To poke fun at who we are, or, worse, at who they think we are. We were the butt of crude and unflattering jokes. I guess they were intended to be jokes. You decide. From "NoVa and RoVa: Welcome To A State of Disagreement": • In NoVa, a lab is the family dog. In RoVa, a lab is the family meth business. • In NoVa, a "fur piece" is something a woman wears on a special occasion. In RoVa, a "fur piece" is a unit of distance. • In NoVa, they listen to NPR. In RoVa, they listen to the NRA. And my personal favorite: • In RoVa, they like freshly killed venison. In NoVa, they like Alfred, Lord Tennyson. Tennyson? Ain't that that feller what cooks up the white lightnin' over in Stinkin' Crick? Or was he that snot-nosed pit crew chief for Dale Jarrett? I can't recollect but no, we don't be knowin' no Tennyson down these ways, dadgummit. I know. About now you're asking yourself: What on Earth does this have to do with style? Well, some things never change. A hundred years ago minstrels would paint their faces black, dress up in antebellum garb and sing "Mammy" to amuse the cultured classes, in hopes of getting six bits thrown at them for the evening meal. This is no different. The Stylists at The Post just did the dressing and singing for us. You might think of it as "Hee Haw" redux. In response, I relay this quote, from Alfred, Lord Tennyson: "No man ever got very high by pulling other people down."

12-01-2006, 05:49 PM	#99
bardy Immortal Location: helllllloooooo!! Posts: 20,831	you drive to go wine tasting

12-01-2006, 05:55 PM	#102
bardy Immortal Location: helllllloooooo!! Posts: 20,831	yeah UVA generally considers VT a bunch of rednecks so anyway if NoVA and UVA and whatever else are goin gto make fun of southwest virginia for being rednecks they are in no right to claim being "southern" in any way shape or form when the time comes.

12-01-2006, 06:14 PM	#103
avian chaos Braindead Location: Portland, OR Posts: 15,137	Anytime I hear the term "the deep South" I always think of jungles and Vietnam.

12-01-2006, 06:15 PM	#104
green chair Banned Posts: 660	I guess it looks like I'm the only one around here who really knows what the real South is all about. I lived for 18 years in DEEP SOUTH ALABAMA, where Atlanta is a "northern city". Now I've lived in a few places, currently Baltimore and I can agree with Bardy and disagree with BlueStar about DC. DC/Baltimore is a large, overpriced shit hole. But so are many places around the country. Gotta be happy where you are. As for as the original question, all the stereotypes are true, but those stereotypes pour forth into all states, contrary to what Mayfuck thinks. He's got this California state of mind, which is a little short sighted.

12-01-2006, 06:25 PM	#106
bardy Immortal Location: helllllloooooo!! Posts: 20,831	this is a biased opnion, but I think NoVA/DC wants to have the good qualities of being "southern" and the good qualities of being "northern" and accept none of the negatives associated with each.

12-01-2006, 06:48 PM	#107
green chair Banned Posts: 660	DC is northern DC is HELL OF A LOT more similar to NYC than Atlanta, anyone that says otherwise is 100% wrong.

12-01-2006, 07:16 PM	#108
Mayfuck Banned Location: i'm from japan also hollywood Posts: 57,812	Good thread. Also BlueStar is kinda dumb.

12-01-2006, 08:49 PM	#109
Nimrod's Son Master of Karate and Friendship Location: in your butt Posts: 72,943	25% Dixie. You are a dandy Yankee Doodle.

12-01-2006, 11:59 PM	#113
donnie darko Ownz Location: ...and a slave obeys. Posts: 653	What happened to that boy?

12-02-2006, 02:21 AM	#115
monkeyfritters Minion of Satan Location: google Posts: 6,663	DC isnt north or south. its BLACK.

12-02-2006, 02:22 AM	#116
monkeyfritters Minion of Satan Location: google Posts: 6,663	geographically speaking, of course.

12-02-2006, 02:51 AM	#117
Nate the Grate Minion of Satan Posts: 6,212	28% Dixie. Lucy, let's mate. I got the question about italians correct!

12-02-2006, 03:34 AM	#119
Ol' Couch Ass Socialphobic Location: The Filthy South Posts: 11,261	I live in South Carolina and am not a big fan. I grew up in Florida which is basically a confused northern state with many elderly people. I don't much care for the South. The term "slow witted southerner" rings true for me almost every day. There is a general attitude of "you aren't from around here are you boy" which I don't much care for. I need to move up north or out west.