Can I have your input

bardy · 08-27-2005, 03:25 PM

I know its a general rule that guys and girls can never just be friends.(However much the girl may want to be "just friends") Have any of you had any experiences where that WAS the case, where both parties had no interest in each other, but hung out alone often.

Grumble · 08-27-2005, 03:31 PM

I had a strictly platonic relationship with a girl for three years. We'd spend lots of time together, just as friends, and it never threatened to become more than that. And then one day, at the beach, I fell over and landed on her; suffice it to say that we bcame entangled and during the struggle to disentangle she became pregnant with three of my babies. One of the babies grew into a devious child who kept me imprisoned in a tower for ten months. You have been warned.

bardy · 08-27-2005, 03:32 PM

holy crap I hope this guy doesn't like me then.

mirrar · 08-27-2005, 03:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Grumble
I had a strictly platonic relationship with a girl for three years. We'd spend lots of time together, just as friends, and it never threatened to become more than that. And then one day, at the beach, I fell over and landed on her; suffice it to say that we bcame entangled and during the struggle to disentangle she became pregnant with three of my babies. One of the babies grew into a devious child who kept me imprisoned in a tower for ten months. You have been warned.

my advice: it can be done. sometimes my guy friends turn out having some sort of thing for me somehow, why i have no fucking clue, but the key is it come out and clarify what kind of relationship you have so nothing gets misconstrued as something else. i never do this, so i tend to end up in trouble.

bardy · 08-27-2005, 03:57 PM

nah I want him to like me

mirrar · 08-27-2005, 05:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by vipbrj
nah I want him to like me

then why are you even asking?

DeviousJ · 08-27-2005, 06:04 PM

Sure people can be just friends, but I think it's more about different degrees than a straight yes or no. If you actually like hanging out together then there's a chemistry there which could be a part of a deeper attraction, you know? Maybe it will develop that way, maybe not. If you're asking because he gives the impression he's not interested when you hope he actually is.. well I guess he and the people around him know best. Just keep batting your eyelashes and falling into him saying 'oh CORY!' and see what happens

Oranjes · 08-27-2005, 06:06 PM

i've never been friends with a girl, so i couldn't say!

DeviousJ · 08-27-2005, 06:07 PM

Did your flower bloom overnight?

ammy · 08-27-2005, 06:22 PM

most of my friends in the past have been boys.
i ended up dating a good majority of them (and then breaking up and never talking to them again).
but i had a few good ones that stayed platonic. so it is possible..

Orenthal James · 08-27-2005, 06:30 PM

the only girls i am friends with are girls that i work with.

and they are all in comitted relationships, and our friendships exist merely because there is so much dead time that we have to talk to each other.

i am not interested in any of them.

then again, we dont hang out outside of work.

except for the one girl who is getting married. i am in their wedding. they are really cool

Oranjes · 08-27-2005, 06:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DeviousJ
Did your flower bloom overnight?

hahahahahah. You poet.

Izzle · 08-27-2005, 06:32 PM

you can have MY input lolol!!

Sam and Mike · 08-27-2005, 06:44 PM

No, it is not possible.

alisonmonster · 06:48 PM

i've been friends with guys for years. two guys who are roomates i've been friends with since highschool- we all get together and play cards like the old times, we're friends. they like to ask me about girl advice and stuff, sicne they don't talk about that stuff amongst themselves.

I've roomed with like 7 different guys- we watch tv, movies, that sort of thing. A few expressed interest in me as a girlfriend, but i said sorry, i don't feel the same way. Things would get uncomfortable for awhile then after time, it went back to normal. My best friend is a guy who is in a 5 year relationship- we have couple get togethers and him and i work well together as a team- we have similar personalities.

I don't give a fuck what anyone says, but my male friends are the longest friendships i've had. We can relate really well, joke around and stuff. They are also friends with my boyfriend. They like having a girl around to ask girlfriend questions and stuff- they know theres nothing there between us. We see each other as just people that are good company- i am a female, but i'm as neutral gender-personality wise as anyone you will ever meet.

edit: i also believe some people are completely incapable of having platonic relationships with the opposite sex , and thats fine. I see people first as personalities, not genders.

vbshlofbvgos · 08-27-2005, 06:58 PM

It is possible but in my experience it seems that ultimately one of them always falls for the other thus creating quite the awkward situation when their feelings are not returned. However, if you can get past that the friendship seems to remain intact if not grow stronger.

Voice Implodes · 08-27-2005, 07:23 PM

one of my best freinds is a girl, and we have been platonic for over 10 years.

DeviousJ · 08-27-2005, 07:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Voice Implodes
one of my best freinds is a girl, and we have been platonic for over 10 years.

How long have you been friends?

tear stained glass · 08-27-2005, 07:27 PM

the vast majority of my friends are girls. i have a girlfriend, so the only person it's a big deal for is her. part of the problem is that i used to be into some of these friends at one point or another, but now we're very platonic. so in my case, not only is it possible, it's commonplace.

murgle · 08-27-2005, 07:30 PM

One of my best friends is a guy. He's like my brother we're so close, so there was never any of that weird sexual tension between us.

Voice Implodes · 08-27-2005, 07:32 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DeviousJ

How long have you been friends?

10 years.

i meant to say almost, not over, in my orignal post.

mxzombie · 08-27-2005, 07:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Voice Implodes
10 years.

i meant to say almost, not over, in my orignal post.

i think he was referring to the fact that you said you were platonic for 10 years but never said anything about being friends for any time at all

DeviousJ · 08-27-2005, 07:38 PM

Anyway, there was a fairly famous research documentary on this - basically how friendships are formed and the dynamics of each, and how these dynamics can interact with those of other friendships within the group and form a fairly complex web. I think ultimately they found that non-platonic undercurrents are often present between complementary individuals but tend to surface out of sync with each other, which is what causes problems, and the deeper the feelings often the more latent they are which is why they rarely develop in the open.

The results did show that perseverance on both sides can win out in the end though. With you guys, what are the signals like? Could you be any more obvious?

I'll see if I can find that documentary study, hold on

Orenthal James · 08-27-2005, 07:40 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by DeviousJ
Anyway, there was a fairly famous research documentary on this - basically how friendships are formed and the dynamics of each, and how these dynamics can interact with those of other friendships within the group and form a fairly complex web. I think ultimately they found that non-platonic undercurrents are often present between complementary individuals but tend to surface out of sync with each other, which is what causes problems, and the deeper the feelings often the more latent they are which is why they rarely develop in the open.

The results did show that perseverance on both sides can win out in the end though. With you guys, what are the signals like? Could you be any more obvious?

I'll see if I can find that documentary study, hold on

where is your fucking source?

Nimrod's Son · 08-27-2005, 07:42 PM

Girls can do it, but if a guy is your friend it means he wants to fuck you at the minimum

Nimrod's Son · 08-27-2005, 07:42 PM

and i was really hoping this thread was about something else judging by the title

alisonmonster · 08-27-2005, 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Nimrod's Son
Girls can do it, but if a guy is your friend it means he wants to fuck you at the minimum

good god, whats the maximum?

Nimrod's Son · 08-27-2005, 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by alisonmonster

good god, whats the maximum?

he's in love with you

perhaps obsessively

Orenthal James · 08-27-2005, 07:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by alisonmonster

good god, whats the maximum?

a loving committed relationship.

guys are deep, man

DeviousJ · 08-27-2005, 07:45 PM

Found it

08-27-2005, 03:25 PM	#1
bardy Immortal Location: helllllloooooo!! Posts: 20,831	Can I have your input I know its a general rule that guys and girls can never just be friends.(However much the girl may want to be "just friends") Have any of you had any experiences where that WAS the case, where both parties had no interest in each other, but hung out alone often.

08-27-2005, 06:44 PM	#14
Sam and Mike You are love, you are soul, you are real to me. Location: In each other's hearts Posts: 3,139	No, it is not possible. __________________ Fair & Accurate

08-27-2005, 06:45 PM	#15
alisonmonster Minion of Satan Location: gasoline alley Posts: 9,019	i've been friends with guys for years. two guys who are roomates i've been friends with since highschool- we all get together and play cards like the old times, we're friends. they like to ask me about girl advice and stuff, sicne they don't talk about that stuff amongst themselves. I've roomed with like 7 different guys- we watch tv, movies, that sort of thing. A few expressed interest in me as a girlfriend, but i said sorry, i don't feel the same way. Things would get uncomfortable for awhile then after time, it went back to normal. My best friend is a guy who is in a 5 year relationship- we have couple get togethers and him and i work well together as a team- we have similar personalities. I don't give a fuck what anyone says, but my male friends are the longest friendships i've had. We can relate really well, joke around and stuff. They are also friends with my boyfriend. They like having a girl around to ask girlfriend questions and stuff- they know theres nothing there between us. We see each other as just people that are good company- i am a female, but i'm as neutral gender-personality wise as anyone you will ever meet. edit: i also believe some people are completely incapable of having platonic relationships with the opposite sex , and thats fine. I see people first as personalities, not genders. Last edited by alisonmonster : 08-27-2005 at 06:48 PM.

08-27-2005, 07:23 PM	#17
Voice Implodes Minion of Satan Location: upstairs Posts: 6,823	one of my best freinds is a girl, and we have been platonic for over 10 years. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 5 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

08-27-2005, 07:42 PM	#25
Nimrod's Son Master of Karate and Friendship Location: in your butt Posts: 72,943	Girls can do it, but if a guy is your friend it means he wants to fuck you at the minimum __________________ - Nimrod's Son: Problem Solver!

08-27-2005, 03:31 PM	#2
Grumble Apocalyptic Poster Location: non-local software. Posts: 2,746	I had a strictly platonic relationship with a girl for three years. We'd spend lots of time together, just as friends, and it never threatened to become more than that. And then one day, at the beach, I fell over and landed on her; suffice it to say that we bcame entangled and during the struggle to disentangle she became pregnant with three of my babies. One of the babies grew into a devious child who kept me imprisoned in a tower for ten months. You have been warned.

08-27-2005, 03:32 PM	#3
bardy Immortal Location: helllllloooooo!! Posts: 20,831	holy crap I hope this guy doesn't like me then.

08-27-2005, 03:57 PM	#5
bardy Immortal Location: helllllloooooo!! Posts: 20,831	nah I want him to like me

08-27-2005, 06:04 PM	#7
DeviousJ CORNFROST Location: GUREITO DESU YO Posts: 24,891	Sure people can be just friends, but I think it's more about different degrees than a straight yes or no. If you actually like hanging out together then there's a chemistry there which could be a part of a deeper attraction, you know? Maybe it will develop that way, maybe not. If you're asking because he gives the impression he's not interested when you hope he actually is.. well I guess he and the people around him know best. Just keep batting your eyelashes and falling into him saying 'oh CORY!' and see what happens

08-27-2005, 06:06 PM	#8
Oranjes Apocalyptic Poster Posts: 4,961	i've never been friends with a girl, so i couldn't say!

08-27-2005, 06:07 PM	#9
DeviousJ CORNFROST Location: GUREITO DESU YO Posts: 24,891	Did your flower bloom overnight?

08-27-2005, 06:22 PM	#10
ammy yer mom Posts: 23,180	most of my friends in the past have been boys. i ended up dating a good majority of them (and then breaking up and never talking to them again). but i had a few good ones that stayed platonic. so it is possible..

08-27-2005, 06:30 PM	#11
Orenthal James Minion of Satan Location: standard hotel accommodation Posts: 9,399	the only girls i am friends with are girls that i work with. and they are all in comitted relationships, and our friendships exist merely because there is so much dead time that we have to talk to each other. i am not interested in any of them. then again, we dont hang out outside of work. except for the one girl who is getting married. i am in their wedding. they are really cool

08-27-2005, 06:32 PM	#13
Izzle Banned Posts: 6,212	you can have MY input lolol!!

08-27-2005, 06:58 PM	#16
vbshlofbvgos Apocalyptic Poster Posts: 1,613	It is possible but in my experience it seems that ultimately one of them always falls for the other thus creating quite the awkward situation when their feelings are not returned. However, if you can get past that the friendship seems to remain intact if not grow stronger.

08-27-2005, 07:27 PM	#19
tear stained glass Minion of Satan Location: el lay Posts: 7,650	the vast majority of my friends are girls. i have a girlfriend, so the only person it's a big deal for is her. part of the problem is that i used to be into some of these friends at one point or another, but now we're very platonic. so in my case, not only is it possible, it's commonplace.

08-27-2005, 07:30 PM	#20
murgle Shaz doesn't fuck around. Location: dallas Posts: 9,260	One of my best friends is a guy. He's like my brother we're so close, so there was never any of that weird sexual tension between us.

08-27-2005, 07:38 PM	#23
DeviousJ CORNFROST Location: GUREITO DESU YO Posts: 24,891	Anyway, there was a fairly famous research documentary on this - basically how friendships are formed and the dynamics of each, and how these dynamics can interact with those of other friendships within the group and form a fairly complex web. I think ultimately they found that non-platonic undercurrents are often present between complementary individuals but tend to surface out of sync with each other, which is what causes problems, and the deeper the feelings often the more latent they are which is why they rarely develop in the open. The results did show that perseverance on both sides can win out in the end though. With you guys, what are the signals like? Could you be any more obvious? I'll see if I can find that documentary study, hold on

08-27-2005, 07:45 PM	#30
DeviousJ CORNFROST Location: GUREITO DESU YO Posts: 24,891	Found it

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