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Old 03-13-2016, 08:07 PM   #211
redbreegull
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Originally Posted by hnibos View Post
People are just fickle.
yeah but why not just be like, "I thought about it and I don't think I want to meet, I'm sorry." I guess I don't understand because I wouldn't do that to someone without offering some sort of explanation as to why I was dismissing them after acting interested?

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 08:19 PM   #212
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Originally Posted by redbreegull View Post
yeah I'm 27. This woman was only 21. I just will never understand the way people act when they are interacting with potential romantic interests. If she wasn't interested in going out why didn't she just say that? If she was and then changed her mind, why didn't she just tell me honestly instead of randomly ghosting me? I know this kind of thing is super common and not exclusively a problem with me or something, I just don't get it and it is discouraging.

We weren't even explicitly going out on "a date" I don't think, we had mostly been talking about how we didn't know anyone around here and it would be cool to meet new people, which makes it even more confusing, like maybe I did do something? Why wouldn't she at least want to meet me in person?
the other day i was supposed to meet this girl. we said we'd meet in the weekend, so i'm waiting it out, contacted her at like 3 pm. no answer. a couple of hours later i send her a message saying "so i guess we're off for today?". then a few hours later she contacts me again making some excuse about how she went on a job interview and her phone battery died and she was almost run over and adopted a dog and went to africa and came back, and sent a voice message saying my name in a sweet and very weird way. so i say, no problem. when do you want to meet?

she then proceeded to block me for no reason whatsoever on whatsapp and unmatch me from that tinder app. i didn't even care about the girl, i was stunned at the sheer insanity of it. like, god what the fuck

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 08:20 PM   #213
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Sounds like you dodged a bullet.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 08:22 PM   #214
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Originally Posted by redbreegull View Post
yeah but why not just be like, "I thought about it and I don't think I want to meet, I'm sorry." I guess I don't understand because I wouldn't do that to someone without offering some sort of explanation as to why I was dismissing them after acting interested?
She probably wasn't that interested to begin with, but felt she had to because she doesn't know many people? It's shitty for sure.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 08:23 PM   #215
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also, went on a date last night. it was immediately obvious that the girl looked totally different (and worse) than her profile picture, but i didn't make a big deal out of it and we went to grab a drink. and by drink, i mean fruit smoothie. do i look like a fucking child to you? ugh. i was going to order red wine but i'm not gonna fucking sit there alone drinking wine while she's drinking a goddamn fruit smoothie.

then we went to play pool at her suggestion, and the evening ended without me making any move for lack of interest, and her seeming inexplicably pissed off at me. all in all, i think i'm pretty good at this dating stuff! will find my soul mate soon for sure. it's "across the street, not down the road", right?

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 08:25 PM   #216
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since i am ranting and nobody cares, i would also like to point out how i'm surprisingly calm during these shitty dates. lots of awkward silences for sure, but they're not even awkward for me, i just embrace them. but the other party may not feel the same well so it's just a guy content with silence and a girl feeling really uncomfortable about it.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 08:29 PM   #217
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this is now a thread for dating problems

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 08:34 PM   #218
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how do people choose usernames for okcupid. like what is this aol instant messenger why not just use real names?

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 08:37 PM   #219
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my favs that i'd seen so far were "BeautifulAttractive", "lolheyhi" and.... "halfbloodcat"

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 08:43 PM   #220
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I would just use redbreegull but my name already lives in infamy across the interwebs

I googled how to come up with a good okc handle, and a pun using your name is the most common suggestion. I can't think of any puns using Ryan

Last edited by redbreegull : 03-13-2016 at 09:38 PM.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 10:38 PM   #221
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drunk on a sunday night

https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com...0ac2e2ca02.jpg

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 10:39 PM   #222
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last night I dreamt that somebody loved me

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:00 PM   #223
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Quote:
Originally Posted by redbreegull View Post
I would just use redbreegull but my name already lives in infamy across the interwebs

I googled how to come up with a good okc handle, and a pun using your name is the most common suggestion. I can't think of any puns using Ryan
i just realized i had no idea what your name was. definitely wouldn't expect you to be a ryan. breaking sweat now trying to think of a handle with a pun using ryan

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:02 PM   #224
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ryanthelion :facepalm:

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:06 PM   #225
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Originally Posted by redbreegull View Post
how do people choose usernames for okcupid. like what is this aol instant messenger why not just use real names?
Look at names here. How the fuck did some of these come about? I know 85% are smashing pumpkins references but the others... Good lord.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:08 PM   #226
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yeah I don't think I really seem like a Ryan either. it was the 13th most popular US boy's name in 1989, but my parents swear there was "no one" named Ryan before they picked it.

literally the only puns I can think of have to do with rye bread

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:09 PM   #227
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yeah that's not bad
like a marbleryan or something

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:15 PM   #228
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Originally Posted by duovamp View Post
Look at names here. How the fuck did some of these come about? I know 85% are smashing pumpkins references but the others... Good lord.
right but I'm not trying to sex any of you. I always assume weird handles are whatever people first thought of when they were on aol in 1998 cause I started using redbreegull when I was ~12.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:15 PM   #229
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Originally Posted by redbreegull View Post
yeah I'm 27. This woman was only 21. I just will never understand the way people act when they are interacting with potential romantic interests. If she wasn't interested in going out why didn't she just say that? If she was and then changed her mind, why didn't she just tell me honestly instead of randomly ghosting me? I know this kind of thing is super common and not exclusively a problem with me or something, I just don't get it and it is discouraging.

We weren't even explicitly going out on "a date" I don't think, we had mostly been talking about how we didn't know anyone around here and it would be cool to meet new people, which makes it even more confusing, like maybe I did do something? Why wouldn't she at least want to meet me in person?
Yeah, that's weird. I can understand when women don't want to explicitly reject men in person and will give them fake numbers and stuff because they are concerned about their safety and never know when some dude will violently freak out on them because he feels entitled can't take rejection. But seeing as this was over the internet behind a computer screen and you presumably had no information with which you could track her down and sever her toes, it seems like she could had just said she changed her mind if she felt that way.

Quote:
Originally Posted by redbreegull View Post
this is now a thread for dating problems
Or a thread about talking about how you ordered yourself a 1lb cake for no reason.

I did it again.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:17 PM   #230
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Ryan isn't a common name to anyone over 40 so they're probably right.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:18 PM   #231
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Originally Posted by Disco King View Post
Or a thread about talking about how you ordered yourself a 1lb cake for no reason.

I did it again.
Oh DK...

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:18 PM   #232
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it's just funny cause I'm pretty sure that if they had cracked open a baby name book they would have discovered that Ryan was a pretty popular name in 87 and 88 as well, and didn't just explode randomly in 89

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:21 PM   #233
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Yeah for the last 4 or 5 years maybe but amongst adults they probably didn't know any Ryans.

Baby book?! Psssh I'm cracking open ASOIAF and picking randomly.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:21 PM   #234
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their other choice for me was "Alex"

they are really creative.

when I name my kids I'm just going to the glossary of the silmarillian and picking randomly

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:25 PM   #235
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Archibald and Chrysanthemum.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:27 PM   #236
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this is my daughter Cuiviénen and her little brother Tulkas

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:33 PM   #237
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I like Selwen as a girl's name. It's very pretty.

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:36 PM   #238
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actually if I have a daughter I want her name to be Lilah or a variant of that. I don't know why, but I have always just felt like that is the name of my daughter

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:38 PM   #239
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i wish tarantino had named me.
that way my name would be something like Joe Gauge and i would be all pimpin' and kicking asses Michael Madsen sstyle and perhaps people would love me

 
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Old 03-13-2016, 11:45 PM   #240
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I wish Sarah Palin had named me so my name could be Trig or Track

 
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