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Old 12-05-2017, 09:30 PM   #361
buzzard
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Did you write the essays because they were girlfriends or were they girlfriends because you wrote the essays?

 
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Old 12-05-2017, 09:40 PM   #362
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hey man everything is a transaction, it's just a matter of what level we are prepared to acknowledge that on

 
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Old 12-05-2017, 10:11 PM   #363
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i always want to make them good posts but everyone shits out bullshit. believe me whatever you put into it is much more than most people. the whole forced discussions on message boards for classes is stupid as fuck. it does not encourage real conversations.

i'm done with my two online classes (dope!) now and i really hated having to do that shit for them
It is very lame, and doesn't encourage anything

I think you're right; the amount of shit I've seen on there is...remarkable. People just not even trying, posting 25% of the word requirement, having trash grammar

I mean I'm not really trying but at least I'll try harder than that

 
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Old 12-05-2017, 10:24 PM   #364
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Tell me about it. My dad makes me grade for his online class "Lessons on Living" (lol). some of those fools don't even capitalize or like use proper punctuation

 
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Old 12-05-2017, 10:26 PM   #365
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love life update

socialist jew weed girl ended things. I'm not really sure what happened, other than her just kind of acting like she's 23. When we first met, we bonded over being very similar in many ways, including appreciation of non-exclusive relationships. Then 3 weeks later she wanted to be exclusive because, according to her, she sensed that we had a really good thing and wanted to focus on that before we let others in. I told her I understood but that I was not ready to be exclusive... I was looking to date around and take my time and hopefully build our relationship in that context instead of jumping in head first (which is a pattern I have played out multiple times before, always to my detriment). She said this just wasn't ok with her, so I was like well I really like you, if this is a deal-breaker, let's try exclusivity. And THEN she was like no, I know it's bad if you just agree to something because you don't want us to break up. So she went away for thanksgiving and told me she was going to mull everything over. She came back and told me SHE is not ready for a relationship of any kind and the whole disagreement just made her realize she was reacting the way she was because she's not at all ready. So I was like fuck ok I guess bye


 
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Old 12-06-2017, 01:53 AM   #366
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23 huh. At 23 I had fallen head over heels for my music professor. I was just recalling today the exact moment I fell for him. And then moments not long after that.

He was married with kids and I was 23 so it was only ever going to be smiles and secret jokes and him encouraging me. At 23, it was all I wanted.

23 year olds are fucked and I mean FUCKED in the head. Move on, my friend. 26 year olds are where it's at.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 02:09 AM   #367
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He was so intentional about everything he said. So slow and deliberate and tender. Like his music. Guys in their twenties just can't match the tenderness of grown men with children.

I was still a child and I missed my Dad and was still hurting from my Dad not wanting me and not loving me the way I was.

Ain't nobody got time for this shit rbg, just cut your losses and move on.

Move the fuck on, is my advice.

Give a human just a few more years and suddenly they're no longer the same confused pit of shame and desire. They're like, all normal and shit.

No I'm kidding. Sort of. I mean, I think once you're over 25, staying away from the under 25s will save you a lot of trouble and drama

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 02:09 AM   #368
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What you need is a fully grown human with a functioning adult brain

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 02:29 AM   #369
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My husband and I have decided to try cheap beer here, and see what it's like. Harbin Fresh is OK on the first sip but he tells me that by the bottom of the second can, it's no good. I couldn't finish a first. It's fine, just that as the chill comes off, the tastebuds are no longer shocked enough to prevent actual taste and it isn't that pleasant.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 02:30 AM   #370
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Dammit I went and listened to my old prof.'s music and now I just want to languish and cry

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 02:40 AM   #371
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Originally Posted by vixnix View Post
My husband and I have decided to try cheap beer here, and see what it's like. Harbin Fresh is OK on the first sip but he tells me that by the bottom of the second can, it's no good. I couldn't finish a first. It's fine, just that as the chill comes off, the tastebuds are no longer shocked enough to prevent actual taste and it isn't that pleasant.
One Sunday I drove to Illinois (to bypass dumb Indiana blue laws) and bought a six pack for $4. It was quite nice. Lovely little store in a deserted small town, sweet old woman running it.

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Dammit I went and listened to my old prof.'s music and now I just want to languish and cry
Most of my life these days is listening to old music and crying

I look to you and I say nothing
I look to you to see the truth

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 10:22 AM   #372
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https://m.youtube.com/#/watch?v=7Nf8o-qhO2g

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 03:33 PM   #373
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Originally Posted by redbreegull View Post
love life update

socialist jew weed girl ended things. I'm not really sure what happened, other than her just kind of acting like she's 23. When we first met, we bonded over being very similar in many ways, including appreciation of non-exclusive relationships. Then 3 weeks later she wanted to be exclusive because, according to her, she sensed that we had a really good thing and wanted to focus on that before we let others in. I told her I understood but that I was not ready to be exclusive... I was looking to date around and take my time and hopefully build our relationship in that context instead of jumping in head first (which is a pattern I have played out multiple times before, always to my detriment). She said this just wasn't ok with her, so I was like well I really like you, if this is a deal-breaker, let's try exclusivity. And THEN she was like no, I know it's bad if you just agree to something because you don't want us to break up. So she went away for thanksgiving and told me she was going to mull everything over. She came back and told me SHE is not ready for a relationship of any kind and the whole disagreement just made her realize she was reacting the way she was because she's not at all ready. So I was like fuck ok I guess bye

Regardless of whether an open relationship is being considered or not, isn't three weeks in a little soon to start exclusively dating?

I'm asking because I actually don't know. I don't have enough experience to know what the typical relationship course is. On the one hand, I've gone out with people over the course of a few months without ever becoming a couple, but on the other hand, those months usually only see a small handful of dates with any particular person, because there are often weeks between dates (it's hard to see people more regularly than that between work and school and just being tired and not wanting to go outside anymore).

Anyway, I dunno, she sounds like she requires a lot of certainty about the direction of her relationships. Twenty-three seems a bit young to me for somebody to feel they have to know if they are ready for a relationship beforehand rather than just going with trial-and-error, or to feel that they have to negotiate exclusivity that early in rather than just seeing where things go. I mean, when one has their entire life to figure that shit out as they go along, it seems like worrying about it only causes unnecessary stress.

But I don't know anything about her history. Maybe she came out of a relationship that was bad because of lack of communication/clarity, and doesn't want to be in that ambiguous spot again.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 04:16 PM   #374
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Originally Posted by Disco King View Post
Regardless of whether an open relationship is being considered or not, isn't three weeks in a little soon to start exclusively dating?

I'm asking because I actually don't know. I don't have enough experience to know what the typical relationship course is. On the one hand, I've gone out with people over the course of a few months without ever becoming a couple, but on the other hand, those months usually only see a small handful of dates with any particular person, because there are often weeks between dates (it's hard to see people more regularly than that between work and school and just being tired and not wanting to go outside anymore).

Anyway, I dunno, she sounds like she requires a lot of certainty about the direction of her relationships. Twenty-three seems a bit young to me for somebody to feel they have to know if they are ready for a relationship beforehand rather than just going with trial-and-error, or to feel that they have to negotiate exclusivity that early in rather than just seeing where things go. I mean, when one has their entire life to figure that shit out as they go along, it seems like worrying about it only causes unnecessary stress.

But I don't know anything about her history. Maybe she came out of a relationship that was bad because of lack of communication/clarity, and doesn't want to be in that ambiguous spot again.
I don't think there is any normal way to do it. In the DATING WORLD I would guess 3 weeks is soon to declare a relationship exclusive, but most of my relationships have formed with people I know circumstantially through friends or school or whatever, and it was kind of a fluid process going from hey let's hang out in a group to oh we're boyfriend/girlfriend now

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 08:19 PM   #375
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I think people sometimes just make up a rationale to account for a feeling they don't necessarily understand.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 08:20 PM   #376
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That's probably why it can occasionally sound like somebody's quoting a soap opera when explaining themselves.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 08:33 PM   #377
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That's probably true. There's evidence in psychology that people often make inferences about their own attitudes and motivations based on their behaviour, in a similar fashion to the way we make inferences about others' behaviours from their external behaviour.

I can't remember the term (Reprise to thread). There was one experiment where they had two groups complete some task, one group being compensated monetarily, the other not. The group that was not given money rated their enjoyment of the task as higher, probably because they reasoned "if I did it for free, I must have liked it."

A similar experiment was done with kids and colouring or something. One group of kids was given the freedom to use any colouring utensils they wished. The other were told that they had to use crayons or something like that for a certain amount of time before they were allowed to use other utensils.

The kids who got to choose rated their enjoyment of using crayons as higher, probably reasoning that they must have enjoyed it to have used them without having had been forced.

I'm probably getting the details wrong, but it was something like that.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 09:05 PM   #378
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Originally Posted by vixnix View Post
23 huh. At 23 I had fallen head over heels for my music professor. I was just recalling today the exact moment I fell for him. And then moments not long after that.

He was married with kids and I was 23 so it was only ever going to be smiles and secret jokes and him encouraging me. At 23, it was all I wanted.

23 year olds are fucked and I mean FUCKED in the head. Move on, my friend. 26 year olds are where it's at.
I got married at 23 but I was actually in love with heroin

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 09:06 PM   #379
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I think people sometimes just make up a rationale to account for a feeling they don't necessarily understand.
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That's probably why it can occasionally sound like somebody's quoting a soap opera when explaining themselves.
this
so much

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 09:10 PM   #380
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I got married at 23 but I was actually in love with heroin
Same! Except I was a month away from turning 23. And I've never tried heroin.


 
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Old 12-06-2017, 09:44 PM   #381
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I'm in love with my hair.

If I could marry it, I would.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 09:45 PM   #382
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Will post pics soon.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 10:09 PM   #383
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Monsieur Took, have you read any elite high brow literature recently?

Of Solaris (2002) "this is perhaps the most ambiguous and cerebrally sophisticated movie in nearly three decades."

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 10:14 PM   #384
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I got married at 23 but I was actually in love with heroin
great last words

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 10:15 PM   #385
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Monsieur Took, have you read any elite high brow literature recently?

Of Solaris (2002) "this is perhaps the most ambiguous and cerebrally sophisticated movie in nearly three decades."
haha the guy totally meant since the original Solaris

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 10:20 PM   #386
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Qwerty I downloaded solaris but it was in czech. watched the original back in the day.

currently on book three of the hainish cycle by URSULA LE GUIN. book four is The Left Hand of Darkness which has been called the best sci-fi evar. better than dune, better than foundation.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 10:21 PM   #387
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This will be my third time with the Left Hand. She is that good.

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 10:24 PM   #388
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This will be my third time with the Left Hand. She is that good.
great last words

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 10:25 PM   #389
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I'm reading a book detailing the underlying Christian themes and implications of Tolkien work, esp LOTR

 
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Old 12-06-2017, 10:25 PM   #390
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haha the guy totally meant since the original Solaris
Clever but incorrect

 
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