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11-24-2019, 01:04 PM | #4951 | |
Minion of Satan
Location: An oasis of horror in a desert of boredom
Posts: 7,752
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Quote:
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11-24-2019, 06:39 PM | #4952 |
Minion of Satan
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,875
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A female friend I have was telling me about how she's upset that her boyfriend wants to try out an open relationship or polyamory (I can't remember which). They've been together since, like, high school.
I told her the best way to get him to reconsider is to accept his proposal for a change in relationship status. Then proceed to sleep as many people as possible as her boyfriend struggles to get so much as eye contact from the person at the club who's earned the nickname "last call." As soon as he remembers how much harder it is for a dude to secure sexual encounters outside of a relationship and starts to feel the sexual jealousy brought on by his girlfriend bedding attractive men left and right, he'll be the one begging to go back to monogamy, I guarantee it. I know that secure, mature people who have reflected on their romantic and sexual needs and find themselves compatible with polyamory won't look at it as some competition with their primary partner and become resentful should they feel they are drawing the short straw, but what are the odds that this guy is some enlightened sexual non-conformist and not just a schmuck who is getting fomo about all the girls he's not sleeping with because he's been sleeping with the same girl since high school? Pretty damn low. |
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11-24-2019, 10:20 PM | #4953 |
Minion of Satan
Location: the institute
Posts: 6,421
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maybe she doesn't want to bang a dozen other guys?
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11-24-2019, 11:06 PM | #4954 |
Minion of Satan
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,875
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Then this particular solution may not suit her.
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11-25-2019, 08:17 AM | #4955 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: František! How's the foot of your turtle?
Posts: 32,743
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lol
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11-27-2019, 01:23 AM | #4956 |
Braindead
Posts: 18,608
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Yeah so I just broke up with her a couple of hours ago because we get into fucking arguments all of the time.
The whole thing was doomed from the start. You'll probably be seeing me around here more often again. |
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11-27-2019, 01:27 AM | #4957 |
Braindead
Posts: 18,608
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11-27-2019, 01:29 AM | #4958 |
Braindead
Posts: 18,608
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monogamy is capitalist propaganda
abolish romantic competition |
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11-27-2019, 10:14 AM | #4959 |
Janis Jopleybird
Location: Let me see you do the booty hop. And now make the booty stop. Now drop, and do the booty wop.
Posts: 6,571
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11-27-2019, 03:22 PM | #4960 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: N3t4Euh Haus
Posts: 32,753
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guys, sex is for losers
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11-27-2019, 03:28 PM | #4961 | |
Socialphobic
Location: I’ve been trying to move to the Nordic countries for 5 years but the cost is astronomical to become an expatriate
Posts: 14,679
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Quote:
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11-27-2019, 03:30 PM | #4962 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: N3t4Euh Haus
Posts: 32,753
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hopefully not sad sex
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11-27-2019, 03:32 PM | #4963 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
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drugs, doi.
who wants the rest of my norco aka hydrocodone!!? def not my bag were it not for the pain, but i'm good now except i can't eat crumbly or granular or chewy things like rice, seeds, most meat, hard candy, or oreos/all cookies for another 4 days. i nibbled on a starburst in four bites last night only chewing with my front teeth and i still gave a quarter of the piece to tim. not cool. Last edited by yo soy el mejor : 11-27-2019 at 03:37 PM. |
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11-27-2019, 03:37 PM | #4964 |
Minion of Satan
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,875
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I got prescribed codeine once after an operation. Still have the full bottle, a testament to my restraint.
Restraint when it comes to drugs, at least. Not when it comes to eating, watching YouTube, aimlessly surfing the internet for twelve hours a day and then going to bed… god, I am so pathetic and wasting my life, and not even doing it in a cool way like with drugs and alcohol and stuff |
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11-27-2019, 03:39 PM | #4965 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
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i still have a whole bottle of lithium just chillin' in the bathroom from well over a year ago. lithium is cool, right? nirvana even named a song after it, y0.
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11-27-2019, 03:39 PM | #4966 |
Minion of Satan
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,875
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(Disclaimer: I'm part joking. Glorifying addiction is obviously bad and lame and I don't condone it. But, like, being a lazy, unaccomplished sack of shit like I am even without drugs is also bad and lame.)
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11-27-2019, 03:42 PM | #4967 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: N3t4Euh Haus
Posts: 32,753
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I still have half a tab of acid wrapped in foil in my sock drawer from a festival last spring
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11-27-2019, 03:42 PM | #4968 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: N3t4Euh Haus
Posts: 32,753
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it speaks to my godliness
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11-27-2019, 04:01 PM | #4969 | |
Socialphobic
Location: I’ve been trying to move to the Nordic countries for 5 years but the cost is astronomical to become an expatriate
Posts: 14,679
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Quote:
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11-27-2019, 04:02 PM | #4970 |
Socialphobic
Location: I’ve been trying to move to the Nordic countries for 5 years but the cost is astronomical to become an expatriate
Posts: 14,679
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Also, have you tried reading the Bible? fuzzy checked it out from the library last week and it's really changing his outlook on life.
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11-27-2019, 04:19 PM | #4971 |
dumb
Location: $8.6 million embezzled funds
Posts: 11,368
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I was talking with a friend about Mazzy Star and realized something absolutely groundbreaking:
I figured out the lyric in that Mazzy Star song [Look on Down from the Bridge] "there's a light in your eyes and you know it" - which used to make me think of shelby (cause she's so bright and happy and that's why I fell so hard) could really apply to Jimmy Chamberlin as well - he's the sweetest guy ever with a beaming smile no homo |
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11-27-2019, 04:32 PM | #4972 |
Minion of Satan
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,875
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Are you relapsing into Chamberholism
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11-27-2019, 04:58 PM | #4973 |
Minion of Satan
Location: An oasis of horror in a desert of boredom
Posts: 7,752
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Whose gettin F’ed up for Xgiving!
Might even rotate in some reggie hits with the micros this time! Lookin fwd to losing my glasses then realize they’re on my stupid face all along! |
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11-27-2019, 05:04 PM | #4974 |
Braindead
Location: Ignore List
Posts: 17,229
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11-27-2019, 05:06 PM | #4975 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
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go big or go home.
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11-27-2019, 05:54 PM | #4976 |
Socialphobic
Location: I’ve been trying to move to the Nordic countries for 5 years but the cost is astronomical to become an expatriate
Posts: 14,679
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I always prefer to go home.
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11-27-2019, 05:57 PM | #4977 |
Socialphobic
Location: I’ve been trying to move to the Nordic countries for 5 years but the cost is astronomical to become an expatriate
Posts: 14,679
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11-27-2019, 05:58 PM | #4978 |
Socialphobic
Location: I’ve been trying to move to the Nordic countries for 5 years but the cost is astronomical to become an expatriate
Posts: 14,679
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Gonna drink lots of wine tonight with the gf, make pizza, make pie (for tomorrow) and watch Jackie Brown.
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11-27-2019, 05:59 PM | #4979 |
Socialphobic
Location: I’ve been trying to move to the Nordic countries for 5 years but the cost is astronomical to become an expatriate
Posts: 14,679
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Sad sex is always an option
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11-27-2019, 06:46 PM | #4980 |
Just Hook it to My Veins!
Location: Donald Trump of Netphoria
Posts: 37,218
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