Netphoria Message Board


Go Back   Netphoria Message Board > General Boards > General Chat Message Board
Register Netphoria's Amazon.com Link Members List Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 10-07-2019, 01:57 AM   #4861
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default

you say you have social anxiety yet you're clocking like 3 dates a month that is bonkers to me

I have been on dates with less women than you can count on one hand in my adult life

they all turned into something because I wasn't asking out random women at the bus stop who I probably had nothing in common with I guess

 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:01 AM   #4862
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Disco King View Post
It's not about not being invested, it's about being a busy working student who can't afford the time to really see any particular person every single day of the week. I've got assignments. I've got shifts. I've got engagements with friends. Even if I can see you in a couple of days, maybe that specific day doesn't work for her. Instead, she's free tomorrow, but I'm not free tomorrow. My next available opening is next week, but the specific day next week doesn't work for her. Before you know it, it's been two weeks between dates. The people I see are also usually busy working students. This is just how it goes for me. I have no idea how people are able to organize their schedules so that they are seeing a particular person, like, every other day.

I still try to communicate my availability. I respond to all texts and never ghost anyone, despite getting ghosted quite a bit myself. Once I set a date, I rarely flake. I think I'm holding up my end of the investment thing more than most people I see are.
then maybe those other things are more important than dating unless you happen by chance to run into one you're really smitten by

I dunno!

 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:08 AM   #4863
Disco King
Minion of Satan
 
Disco King's Avatar
 
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,853
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphenor View Post
you say you have social anxiety yet you're clocking like 3 dates a month that is bonkers to me
You know how you wait around for a bus for a really long time, and then two come at once? It's kinda like that for me. I go through spells of not getting any dates, and then I'll get with two or three different people in a short time span. It's probably for no other reason than that when something is more-or-less random, so long as you don't have a whole lot of data points, you're actually more likely get clusters instead of an equal distribution, even though our brains anticipate that randomness should be uniform.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphenor View Post
I have been on dates with less women than you can count on one hand in my adult life

they all turned into something because I wasn't asking out random women at the bus stop who I probably had nothing in common with I guess
I've not had any more success with people I've met through mutual friends or anything.

 
Disco King is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:11 AM   #4864
Disco King
Minion of Satan
 
Disco King's Avatar
 
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,853
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphenor View Post
then maybe those other things are more important than dating unless you happen by chance to run into one you're really smitten by

I dunno!
I've felt really smitten with a few people, but not to the extent that I've gone "wow, I would totally flunk out of school and get fired from my job for her," sorry.

Contemplating leaving school to be with a girl in another state sounds more like an Elph thing, anyway

 
Disco King is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:13 AM   #4865
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default

when a woman finally "gets" you and then it ends up not working out you''ll get it

I'll be waiting with widespread sticky Bat arms

 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:16 AM   #4866
yo soy el mejor
Just Hook it to My Veins!
 
yo soy el mejor's Avatar
 
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
Default

so hauntingly tragically beautifully dark

 
yo soy el mejor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:19 AM   #4867
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default


 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:19 AM   #4868
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by yo soy el mejor View Post
so hauntingly tragically beautifully dark
*headbangs*

 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:29 AM   #4869
Disco King
Minion of Satan
 
Disco King's Avatar
 
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,853
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphenor View Post
when a woman finally "gets" you and then it ends up not working out you're gonna go full Goth like me
This has happened. Recap of depressed whimsical flower ghost girl:

>Go to electronic DJ thing where everybody is weird middle-aged candy kids, some even wearing those tails and shit
>Spot this one girl who looks like the only person other than me who really doesn't fit in and is wearing all black instead of neon
>Chat with her, get her number, we go on dates
>Have a lot in common, including both being riddled with anxiety and awkwardness and depression
>Find her really funny and cute and fall head over heels; she seems into me, even paying for me on our first date
>End up getting more dates with her than I have with anyone else
>Despite this, always too shy and awkward to really be flirtatious or make any moves
>Only kiss her by the end of the fourth date when she's dropping me off, saying something lame like "I don't know how to go about this because I'm really awkward, but I feel like I should kiss you," kissing her a little bit, and then saying something like "sorry that was bad, probably need more practice" before running into my house out of nervousness and going to bed
>Few days of being ignored later, get the "I don't feel the chemistry" text
>FeelsBadMan.jpg because we were getting along real well and super compatible, and it really feels like it was my awkwardness that killed it because she probably wondered why nothing was happening and reasoned based of this that "we just must not have chemistry"
>Hang out with her as friends a couple times after, have some deep conversations and still feel smitten with her, a little bit of flirting seems to occur
>Get ghosted again
>Call her and find out she's ghosting me because she's seeing somebody new and still feels like there's romantic tension between us and she's confused and doesn't know what to do
>Still really like her, but I also want to respect her earlier decision to break things off and I just want her to be happy, so I don't try to get her back and I make sure that things are more platonic between us by only really inviting her to group things now
>Still feel crushed when she decides to move cities to be with her boyfriend, but don't say anything because WhenYouLoveSomebodyYouMustSetThemFree.jpg
>Female friend says I should tell this girl my feelings and fight to get her to stay, but I feel that would be pushy and disrespectful of her choice


Okay, like, I'm not full goth, just a genre-fluid sadboi, but in the end it's all the same shit

 
Disco King is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:31 AM   #4870
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default

you are a lot more sane than I, I will give you that

 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:33 AM   #4871
Disco King
Minion of Satan
 
Disco King's Avatar
 
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,853
Default

The sanity comes from not exclusively listening to post-punk and gothic rock and realizing that heavy metal and shoegaze can also be part of a balanced sadboi diet.

 
Disco King is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:34 AM   #4872
Disco King
Minion of Satan
 
Disco King's Avatar
 
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,853
Default


 
Disco King is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:36 AM   #4873
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default

but like, I didn't want to move states to be with a girl I saw on four good dates

I was in an exclusive relationship with her for over a year

I dunno!

 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:39 AM   #4874
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Disco King View Post
The sanity comes from not exclusively listening to post-punk and gothic rock and realizing that heavy metal and shoegaze can also be part of a balanced sadboi diet.
I like shoegaze every metal song is too masculine for my sadboi self

 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:50 AM   #4875
Disco King
Minion of Satan
 
Disco King's Avatar
 
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,853
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphenor View Post
but like, I didn't want to move states to be with a girl I saw on four good dates

I was in an exclusive relationship with her for over a year

I dunno!
True, but even that girl I went on four dates with, I was seeing over a period of, like, five months, so it felt a lot more intimate than when you see somebody for four dates but only across a couple of weeks.

It was a combination of both our busyness, and the fact that her depression and other mental-health stuff made it so that she didn't feel up to leaving her house a whole lot and she was kinda a recluse.

 
Disco King is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:51 AM   #4876
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default

post-punk/gothic rock pushed a lot of the tones that would become dream pop and then shoegaze just saying

 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:54 AM   #4877
Elphenor
Braindead
 
Elphenor's Avatar
 
Location: TX
Posts: 16,289
Default

the idea of trying to make the guitar sound like it was anything but a guitar was expressed in interviews by Daniel Ash of Bauhaus and then later echo'd by Kevin Shields and Co.

 
Elphenor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 09:33 AM   #4878
Shallowed
Braindead
 
Posts: 18,608
Default

.

Last edited by Shallowed : 05-10-2022 at 06:22 AM.

 
Shallowed is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 09:42 AM   #4879
Shallowed
Braindead
 
Posts: 18,608
Default

.

Last edited by Shallowed : 05-10-2022 at 06:22 AM.

 
Shallowed is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 11:02 AM   #4880
myosis
Minion of Satan
 
myosis's Avatar
 
Location: the institute
Posts: 6,421
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Disco King View Post
True, but even that girl I went on four dates with, I was seeing over a period of, like, five months, so it felt a lot more intimate than when you see somebody for four dates but only across a couple of weeks.
somehow this feels inversed to me...

it would feel a lot more intimate to me if i had four dates inside two weeks, because then it's obvious we really like to spend time with each other and can't get enough of it. it's also easier to form a bond over our daily worries, struggles and joys than if we only catch up once every month.

Last edited by myosis : 10-07-2019 at 11:15 AM.

 
myosis is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 11:28 AM   #4881
topleybird
Janis Jopleybird
 
topleybird's Avatar
 
Location: Let me see you do the booty hop. And now make the booty stop. Now drop, and do the booty wop.
Posts: 6,564
Question

Quote:
Originally Posted by Disco King View Post
It's probably for no other reason than that when something is more-or-less random, so long as you don't have a whole lot of data points, you're actually more likely get clusters instead of an equal distribution, even though our brains anticipate that randomness should be uniform.
If you accelerated women to lightspeed and fired them one at a time through two slits, do you think they'd behave more like particles or waves

 
topleybird is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 02:37 PM   #4882
yo soy el mejor
Just Hook it to My Veins!
 
yo soy el mejor's Avatar
 
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
Default

good question!

 
yo soy el mejor is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 09:10 PM   #4883
redbreegull
Just Hook it to My Veins!
 
redbreegull's Avatar
 
Location: N3t4Euh Haus
Posts: 32,749
Default

the sexism on this board is just unbelievable guys. talking about shooting women through slits. jesus

 
redbreegull is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 10:00 PM   #4884
Mals Marola
Socialphobic
 
Mals Marola's Avatar
 
Location: Your god damn living room
Posts: 10,000
Default

Is discussion of women going through slits not permitted? Did I miss something?

I'll give you points for some old school netphorian MORAL OUTRAGE though

 
Mals Marola is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-07-2019, 10:31 PM   #4885
Disco King
Minion of Satan
 
Disco King's Avatar
 
Location: Banned
Posts: 8,853
Default

Accelerating women to the speed of light isn't really acceptable here. It's strictly prohibited by the laws of physics, as it would require infinite energy and make them infinitely massive (not that I'm body-shaming people with infinite mass).

 
Disco King is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-08-2019, 02:08 AM   #4886
buzzard
Minion of Satan
 
buzzard's Avatar
 
Posts: 6,781
Default

I thought that dating was just something they do in American movies because it's easier than capturing colleagues, classmates, [insert other forms of natural acquaintanceship here] spanning time while things develop at their own pace.

Exposure might be key, here.

 
buzzard is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-08-2019, 05:06 AM   #4887
vixnix
Socialphobic
 
vixnix's Avatar
 
Location: we are champions, bathed in the heat of a thousand flame wars in the grim future of the internet there is only netphoria
Posts: 12,467
Default

Sex post: just found out one of my favourite NZ poets was a vile rapist

I think I will just never enjoy art again, it seems easier that way

 
vixnix is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-12-2019, 01:14 PM   #4888
slunken
Virgo
 
slunken's Avatar
 
Posts: 42,781
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by vixnix View Post
Sex post: just found out one of my favourite NZ poets was a vile rapist

I think I will just never enjoy art again, it seems easier that way
who says a vile rapist cannot be a great poet?

 
slunken is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-31-2019, 02:58 AM   #4889
Shallowed
Braindead
 
Posts: 18,608
Default

This is now The Official Thursday/Friday candy thread

 
Shallowed is offline
Reply With Quote
Old 10-31-2019, 11:36 AM   #4890
yo soy el mejor
Just Hook it to My Veins!
 
yo soy el mejor's Avatar
 
Location: all over the Internet
Posts: 44,548
Cool

Quote:
Originally Posted by Disco King View Post
The sanity comes from not exclusively listening to post-punk and gothic rock and realizing that heavy metal and shoegaze can also be part of a balanced sadboi diet.
i, too, am sad and listen to an eclectic mix of music. it doesn't feel like anything, tho.

 
yo soy el mejor is offline
Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Google


Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Something I have noticed... rottenugly General Chat Archive 38 04-17-2012 04:25 PM
my very original ask me questions thread dr.benway General Chat Archive 27 08-04-2009 05:26 PM
biggest board loser (with poll) dean_r_koontz General Chat Archive 198 05-07-2008 05:20 PM
I didn't realize people on this board were actually smashing pumpkin fans. I Ate My Hamster General Chat Archive 29 06-12-2007 11:49 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 07:00 PM.




Smashing Pumpkins, Alternative Music
& General Discussion Message Board and Forums
www.netphoria.org - Copyright © 1998-2022