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Old 05-20-2018, 10:59 PM   #91
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so what, a teenager at the time asked to see nudes of someone his age, is that your story?

aha. and that makes it somehow worse than you, a 30 year old, going "oh please that actress was all woman, 17 or not" - yes? okay then.

go hit the shower. yes please do.


noyen, back to you, it's been fun

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:00 PM   #92
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Originally Posted by noyen View Post
spend an hour in a room with a canadian who is obsessed with donald trump?
I should have taken this, probably. show master, can I change my pick real quick? thanks!

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:00 PM   #93
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Originally Posted by fuzzyroes View Post
Someone dug up the post and posted it not too long ago. I know people know what I'm talking about. It was brought up not too long ago. I'll look for it, but I swear to god I'm not lying.

I won't say another word until I find it or someone else posts it though.
I said many stupid things in the past. If you fail to produce this quote though, I am serious about my suggestion we just ban you permanently.

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:03 PM   #94
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It shouldn't be too much effort to pull up fuzzy sexually fawning over photos of a 14-year-old from 2 weeks ago, calling her "all woman" despite her age. But if you want to live or die over the possibility I may have asked to see nudes of a teenager when I was teenager over ten years ago, sure, let's see what you can pull up

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:06 PM   #95
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Originally Posted by pavementtune View Post
so what, a teenager at the time asked to see nudes of someone his age, is that your story?
Precisely. But hold on, I'm trying to find the exchange. I'm 100 percent not lying about this, guys.

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:07 PM   #96
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I said many stupid things in the past. If you fail to produce this quote though, I am serious about my suggestion we just ban you permanently.
I'm looking. I expect a big-time apology when I produce it.

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:09 PM   #97
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just to recap though, happened in 2018:

-fuzzy says for the fourth time Indian women are just really hairy and he isn't being racist or sexist
-fuzzy sticks up for vladimir putin's human rights record, including anti-gay policies
-fuzzy suggests if you are having low self-esteem, go after fat and ugly girls to up your kill count and boost your ego
-fuzzy attacks minors who are the victims of school mass shootings
-fuzzy is shocked to see a Muslim family who are acting non-suspiciously in public, almost like they are real people
-fuzzy repeatedly attacks trans people's basics rights of existence, hijacking science to discredit people's identities

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:09 PM   #98
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I'm looking. I expect a big-time apology when I produce it.
maybe you can eat shit out of my ass first, you collossal fucking lying toolbag Nazi

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:10 PM   #99
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noyen, wake up. set us on fire.

no wait, can you nail my entire feet to the floor? is it too late to change this round?

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:11 PM   #100
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you know what can we just ban this fucking dickcheese regardless?

 
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Old 05-20-2018, 11:13 PM   #101
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wrong address. my vote to yes still stands, the no votes probably still stand, gotta ask them.

I think we are very close to hitting this option

Quote:
Originally Posted by noyen View Post
fuck your way out of a 95 story retirement home full of altsexual people who molest you to hideous death
nooooooooo

95 floors, but how many rooms on each floor? I need details first

 
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Old 05-21-2018, 02:20 AM   #102
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die in a fire or perma ban fuzzyrows

 
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Old 05-21-2018, 06:53 PM   #103
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Quote:
Originally Posted by noyen View Post
Ericka you are one of the best people and worthy people on this earth, fuck tha mainstream! ������
Quote:
Originally Posted by FoolofaTook View Post
yeah reprise you rock. super smart and super kind.
thanks to you both

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Originally Posted by Eulogy View Post
Reprise I know I’m not around a ton but I think we’d have a lot talk about.
anytime bro, pm away

Quote:
Originally Posted by fuzzyroes View Post
Reprise, do you partake in any fitness activities? That really is what I would strongly recommend doing. Physical fitness is great for a healthy mood balance and then afterwards you can enjoy in a love for food because of all the energy you burned. I know fitness can seem daunting, but you can start off just going on a jog once or twice a week and it really starts to become addicting and gets easier the more you do it. There's no doubt in my mind that going on jogs or runs would help with your depression, hell it's basically scientifically proven. Why not do yourself a favor and give it a try?

But really, once you get into your 40's and 50's you really gotta watch your diet and try to stay in physical shape or else you're gonna have a ton of health problems. It just takes determination and strong mental will to make a change.
I know I'm going to die early, Fuzzy. Do you think I don't know that walking for 30 minutes a day would be good for me? Or that eating less calories will result in my losing weight? Do you think I'm stupid?

So if I assume you don't think I'm stupid, and that I realize I will end up dying early because of my habits, do you think it's possible there is something else stopping me besides just 'forcing' myself to do it? Yes, I'm lazy. Yes, I'm a piece of shit and should just do it. But my problems are much more basic than not exercising. I don't take care of myself at all, practically. It might seem basic to you but I'm still recovering from years of brainwashing and sexual abuse. I have no relationships. I am barely a person.

I don't want you to feel bad for me nor do I want your advice. I am trying to get through to you that people who are morbidly obese ALL have a story and it often starts with severe abuse in childhood. Maybe making fun of these people might not seem like the best thing to do once you realize you are punching down at people who hate themselves much more than you resent them

Last edited by reprise85 : 05-21-2018 at 07:00 PM.

 
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Old 05-21-2018, 09:25 PM   #104
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Damn... I didn't realize you were struggling so much. I'd offer support or motivation but I reckon that you don't wanna hear it. I will say that everyday you're above ground, you have a shot at happiness of fulfillment. You strike me a nice person and I know you deserve to feel good in life. Remember, if you surrender in life because of the terrible things that people have done to you, you're letting them win.

Sorry if I was insensitive before.

 
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Old 05-21-2018, 09:34 PM   #105
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Edit the first paragraph out and you'll be doing just fine.

 
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Old 05-21-2018, 09:42 PM   #106
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Nah man, I think it's good advice. I believe in her.

 
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Old 05-21-2018, 10:36 PM   #107
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She doesn't need your advice though. She is an intelligent, self-aware person. It comes across as condescending when you try to pass it off on her.

 
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Old 05-22-2018, 07:22 AM   #108
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Originally Posted by fuzzyroes View Post
Damn... I didn't realize you were struggling so much. I'd offer support or motivation but I reckon that you don't wanna hear it. I will say that everyday you're above ground, you have a shot at happiness of fulfillment. You strike me a nice person and I know you deserve to feel good in life. Remember, if you surrender in life because of the terrible things that people have done to you, you're letting them win.

Sorry if I was insensitive before.
It's ok fuzzy. It's not that I don't want to hear support or motivation, and I haven't given up. It's just when you assume that things that come relatively easy to you should be that way for everybody that I get frustrated. Literally everyone knows how to take care of themselves or can find out very easily. It's one thing to say "you should jog 2x a week" and another to say "I finally got myself to jog 2x per week by doing __________". the "you should" language is condescending, especially when it comes from someone who is himself just starting a new lifestyle.

 
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Old 05-22-2018, 07:44 AM   #109
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Yeah, that's true. I didn't mean it that way. I guess I'm just trying to share my own enthusiasm, but in a way, it's like I'm almost trying to sell it to myself too. You just strike me as a genuinely bright mind, it sucks that you deal with these mental blockades. I guess we all do in certain senses, but I do have a sincere concern cause you almost sound defeated when describing that stuff.

Wish there was something we could do to help.

 
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Old 05-22-2018, 08:08 PM   #110
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thanks, this board and the people on it do help a lot of the time.

if you ever want to read about complex post traumatic stress disorder, that is basically what causes me all of these problems. it is not an official diagnosis, yet, in the ICD (codes docs use to bill insurance), but it will be soon, and it absolutely describe my problems almost perfectly, in addition to depression of course. even wikipedia has a pretty good write up:

Quote:
Children and adolescents
The diagnosis of PTSD was originally developed for adults who had suffered from a single event trauma, such as rape, or a traumatic experience during a war.[9] However, the situation for many children is quite different. Children can suffer chronic trauma such as maltreatment, family violence, and a disruption in attachment to their primary caregiver.[10] In many cases, it is the child's caregiver who caused the trauma.[9] The diagnosis of PTSD does not take into account how the developmental stages of children may affect their symptoms and how trauma can affect a child’s development.[9]

The term developmental trauma disorder (DTD) has also been suggested.[10] This developmental form of trauma places children at risk for developing psychiatric and medical disorders.[10] Bessel van der Kolk explains DTD as numerous encounters with interpersonal trauma such as physical assault, sexual assault, violence or death. It can also be characterized by subjective events like betrayal, defeat or shame.[11]

Repeated traumatization during childhood leads to symptoms that differ from those described for PTSD.[11] Cook and others describe symptoms and behavioural characteristics in seven domains:[12][13]

Attachment – "problems with relationship boundaries, lack of trust, social isolation, difficulty perceiving and responding to others' emotional states"
Biology – "sensory-motor developmental dysfunction, sensory-integration difficulties, somatization, and increased medical problems"
Affect or emotional regulation – "poor affect regulation, difficulty identifying and expressing emotions and internal states, and difficulties communicating needs, wants, and wishes"
Dissociation – "amnesia, depersonalization, discrete states of consciousness with discrete memories, affect, and functioning, and impaired memory for state-based events"
Behavioural control – "problems with impulse control, aggression, pathological self-soothing, and sleep problems"
Cognition – "difficulty regulating attention, problems with a variety of 'executive functions' such as planning, judgement, initiation, use of materials, and self-monitoring, difficulty processing new information, difficulty focusing and completing tasks, poor object constancy, problems with 'cause-effect' thinking, and language developmental problems such as a gap between receptive and expressive communication abilities."
Self-concept – "fragmented and disconnected autobiographical narrative, disturbed body image, low self-esteem, excessive shame, and negative internal working models of self".
Adults
Adults with C-PTSD have sometimes experienced prolonged interpersonal traumatization as children as well as prolonged trauma as adults. This early injury interrupts the development of a robust sense of self and of others. Because physical and emotional pain or neglect was often inflicted by attachment figures such as caregivers or older siblings, these individuals may develop a sense that they are fundamentally flawed and that others cannot be relied upon.[5][14]

This can become a pervasive way of relating to others in adult life described as insecure attachment. The diagnosis of dissociative disorder and PTSD in the current DSM-5 (2013) do not ******* insecure attachment as a symptom. Individuals with Complex PTSD also demonstrate lasting personality disturbances with a significant risk of revictimization.[15]

Six clusters of symptoms have been suggested for diagnosis of C-PTSD:[6][16]

alterations in regulation of affect and impulses;
alterations in attention or consciousness;
alterations in self-perception;
alterations in relations with others;
somatization;
alterations in systems of meaning.[16]
Experiences in these areas may include:[4][17][18]

Difficulties regulating emotions, including symptoms such as persistent dysphoria, chronic suicidal preoccupation, self injury, explosive or extremely inhibited anger (may alternate), or compulsive or extremely inhibited sexuality (may alternate).
Variations in consciousness, including forgetting traumatic events (i.e., psychogenic amnesia), reliving experiences (either in the form of intrusive PTSD symptoms or in ruminative preoccupation), or having episodes of dissociation.
Changes in self-perception, such as a chronic and pervasive sense of helplessness, paralysis of initiative, shame, guilt, self-blame, a sense of defilement or stigma, and a sense of being completely different from other human beings.
Varied changes in the perception of the perpetrator, such as attributing total power to the perpetrator, becoming preoccupied with the relationship to the perpetrator, including a preoccupation with revenge, idealization or paradoxical gratitude, seeking approval from the perpetrator, a sense of a special relationship with the perpetrator or acceptance of the perpetrator's belief system or rationalizations.
Alterations in relations with others, including isolation and withdrawal, persistent distrust, anger and hostility, a repeated search for a rescuer, disruption in intimate relationships and repeated failures of self-protection.
Loss of, or changes in, one's system of meanings, which may ******* a loss of sustaining faith or a sense of hopelessness and despair.
Disconnection from surroundings accompanied by feelings of terror and confusion.

 
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Old 05-22-2018, 08:11 PM   #111
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but yeah the original point is people who can't control themselves in one realm or another are generally having a hard time at life and making fun of them is probably not very nice

 
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Old 05-22-2018, 09:56 PM   #112
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x

Last edited by Ram27 : 07-10-2018 at 01:42 PM.

 
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Old 05-22-2018, 10:13 PM   #113
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WWW.LIVEJOURNAL.COM

 
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Old 05-22-2018, 10:14 PM   #114
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Old 05-22-2018, 10:45 PM   #115
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but yeah the original point is people who can't control themselves in one realm or another are generally having a hard time at life and making fun of them is probably not very nice
Yeah no doubt. To be clear, I never make fun of any one in real life about anything. I'm a compassionate person. What I more rally against is this effort by the establishment to make everything off-limits to the point of censoring comedy.

I think sometimes I don't articulate that very well. I'm just aware that the battles on free-speech can be a very slippery slope.

I don't know if you've ever heard of the Canadian psychologist Jordan Peterson, but he's selling out venues around America right now and he talks a lot about this kind of stuff in a much more articulate way than I can manage. He's an amazingly bright man. You should check him out. I'll definitely refrain from posting his videos though, as I feel I'm on thin ice around here haha.

 
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Old 05-22-2018, 11:01 PM   #116
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I’ve been going through some serious shit with alcohol too fuzzy.

I realized I was basically going to drink myself to death (like, to the point where i'm genuinely frightened of having seizures if i start taking anti-depressants. it's FUCKED.) if I didn’t work on the underlying problem - crippling depression from my crippling lack of social skills / crippling loneliness. I realized whenever I visited my parents for spring break that I had no urge to drink when I was there - I was around other people. And I don’t have the skills to form the sorts of relationships that make me actually…enjoy being alive. Like even on here I can’t even have conversations with you folks. And that’s fucked up on my part - you all seem like super cool people.

And it’s really funny/ironic/painful that that’s the problem I’m covering up b/c drinking makes you more social. And it’s the only thing that’s given me any sort of positive motivation in weeks.

And when I got very very depressed for the same reason in the fall of 2016, drinking blissed me out of the loneliness and anxiety and gave me the drive to get through my classes. I got all fucking As that semester.

Now I’ve hit a wall academically and I’m so very very behind. My parents are covering my entire fucking tuition and rent and shit and I’m not even good enough to repay them. That’s fucking awful. People are taking out loans and grinding and I’m sitting in my bed in “my” apartment being a fucking loser.
___________

that drummer in that band i like had a great quote “Don’t let addiction jeopardize your relationship with your instrument”. It’s funny cause I haven’t touched my drums sober in probably two months. Either way, playing a lot less than normal.

I think I idealized in my head that if I got good, joined a band, I’d meet people and make connections and shit. We played two gigs and I deadass did not say a non-business-related word the whole time. It was fucked up alienating.

Now my skills are declining and I don’t think I can relearn them. Which is crushing because I used to pride myself on being good. Now I’ve realized it doesn’t matter, it’s not getting me anywhere.
____________

I’m honestly not sure where the fuck I’m going to end up. Surely not somewhere good.

sorry about the novel y'all. I've never typed this out in a non-anonymous way before.

____________________________

and yeah reprise you're totally not a trash person; it's incredible how much you've succeeded in higher education and generally being cool, especially given all that fucked up shit in your past. i know you can get where you want to be ❤️
Jeeze man. All that stuff is hauntingly similar to my own experience.

I'll say one thing, you're still young, take it from me, alcohol isn't the answer. You gotta really moderate that shit... Like twice a week tops. It's painful for me to admit this so frankly, as I was in denial about it for years and years and tried to believe that it was helping me... But it's all very surface levels of satisfaction that you get from it... Nothing to build long lasting memories upon.

I feel like I've essentially wasted 10 years of my life in an alcoholic haze. Of course I was drinking for the same reasons you were and it was really working in a lot of ways, but I think back as a 32 year old and all that shit just seemed like a waste of time and a waste of peak life years. What I realize now is that I simply didn't have the courage to face my own flaws and weaknesses head on so I fully embraced the crutch of alcoholism. I'm still trying to right the ship so to speak. But you're drunk and a mess in your 20's and it's somewhat socially acceptable, but it stops being cute in your 30's and becomes pathetic by the time you're in your 40's.

I don't wanna beat a dead-horse here, but I'd really turn to physical fitness if was you. Trust me, it'll make you sharper, more active, more appealing to women and you'll start to gain some self worth in the process because you'll gain self of steam in realizing that you're really working towards something to benefit yourself mentally. I really think you should try it if you're not already... What have you got to lose? You only have one life brother, you gotta fight for your wellbeing. Don't let it be a waste.

 
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Old 05-22-2018, 11:11 PM   #117
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That's a cool quote from the drummer you like. Kanye West had a similar quote. He had some roadie fetching him pills and as the roadie gave them to him he said "just so you know, this is the shit that kills genius"

 
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Old 05-23-2018, 12:14 AM   #118
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Jordan Peterson
are you fucking serious

 
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Old 05-23-2018, 12:15 AM   #119
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you dumb fucking dick

 
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Old 05-23-2018, 12:27 AM   #120
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personally I would rather diaf

 
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