Friday/Saturday drunk or otherwise thread

[smashingjj]

what have you been up to b0llster?

what is your real name?

how old were you when you lost my virginity?

when did i last cry in the shower with my clothes on? (hint: just now)

what is your social security number and why?

are you still coming to europe?

[smashingjj]

[smashingjj]

also:

[teh b0lly!!1]

dear joeri,

please hold me close and never let go.

yours sincerely,

[smashingjj]

[FoolofaTook]

Those bros look fresh.

[teh b0lly!!1]

Originally Posted by smashingjj

what have you been up to b0llster?

i've been getting up every morning, laughing hysterically and wildly clapping my hands until my body shuts down. then i go to sleep!

what is your real name?

pm

how old were you when you lost my virginity?

who said i lost my virginity
#triggerde

when did i last cry in the shower with my clothes on? (hint: just now)

i'm doing it right now
(simultaneously laughing hysterically makes it difficult to do but i'm getting the hang of it LOLOLOLOL *sobs*)

what is your social security number and why?

i dunno but i blame my dad for it.
fuck you dad!

are you still coming to europe?

i have no idea what's going on atm but i do definitely plan to do so in the near future. might be in a few months, might be in a year.
you'll surely regret (or have perhaps wholly forgotten) jokingly inviting me to your apartment a few months ago, but i remember fully and intend to crash into your life, eat your food and inappropriately hit on your gf, so i would suggest you start dealing with it from now.

[smashingjj]

YES!! YES!! YES!! I FORGOT! I DID NOT FORGET! NEVER FORGET! I NEVER DID! I NEVER SAID SUCH A THING! I WAS NEVER ON NETPHORIA!

yes i fully remember and you are fully welcome and that is fully the reason why i asked!

[teh b0lly!!1]

THAT'S AWESOME OF YOU, THANKS

OH SORRY MY CAPS WAS ON

THIS IS JUST MY NATURAL SPEECH LOL! *SOBS* LOL!

[FoolofaTook]

Your all caps was on

[yo soy el mejor]

Originally Posted by Disco King

I lost my phone. I've never lost my phone before.

I dunno, I do regular pocket checks, and I always check the seat before I leave the bus or train. I must have forgotten to do that this time.

Using Google's "locate my phone" service doesn't work, and it goes straight to voicemail when I call it. That means it's either in a place where it doesn't have reception (I'm with a carrier with shitty towers), or somebody found it and turned it off.

Hopefully not the latter. Most people who find a lost phone wouldn't want to steal it, but I just hope mine didn't fall into the hands of somebody who would.

that sux!
one time i lost my phone and my friends and i called it until when it rang it just went to voicemail and i thought it was gone forever. but i called it again and somehow it rang, but when it went to voicemail there was a young man's voice saying 'Hey, this is David's phone now, so if you're looking for ****** or whatever, she don't have this number no more'

I left a message saying, "David, this is ******. This is not your phone, you little liar." or something along those lines. I was able to find different numbers he had called through phone records and I called them all asking about David until one of the numbers turned out to be his home phone.

I told his mom what he did and then a few minutes later David texted from my phone saying he would give it back and it was one of his friends who had it pretending to be him.

[yo soy el mejor]

shouldn't have stolen my razr, y0!

[vixnix]

So, it used to be that you were in Israel and I was in Australia, now you are in Shanghai and I will be in Singapore coincidence I think not

[LaBelle]

Welcome back teh b0lly!!1

[ohnoitsbonnie]

Originally Posted by redbreegull

dude it's like cheese encased in caramelized string sugar with rose water and almonds or some shit it's off the motherfucking chain

It's pastry

[teh b0lly!!1]

Originally Posted by vixnix

So, it used to be that you were in Israel and I was in Australia, now you are in Shanghai and I will be in Singapore coincidence I think not

wait

what??

[LaBelle]

I woke up this morning to find empty bottles of beer on the floor... I don't remember bringing any of these home, or even drinking here.

I'll blame the ghost.

[LaBelle]

Kicking an empty beer bottle as my first step out of bed was slightly alarming though, not gonna lie.

[smashingjj]

sorry, i must have left them there after breaking into your appartment. nice appartment by the way.


i totally did not film you while sleeping and broadcast it, also.

[LaBelle]

Twilight taught me people breaking into my house and watching me in my sleep is romantic.

[smashingjj]

Yes and broadcasting it on the dark web too!

[LaBelle]

But you told me the red light meant the camera was on standby!

[smashingjj]

that was your cousin?

now i feel dirty.

[LaBelle]

Was he a centenary vampire?

That would be super creepy if he wasn't.

[run2pee]

Originally Posted by LaBelle

I woke up this morning to find empty bottles of beer on the floor... I don't remember bringing any of these home, or even drinking here.

I'll blame the ghost.

There's only one solution for this: quick, go buy the exact brand of beer again and begin to drink it. Soon your body will experience situational-dependent memory strikes. Your mind will recall in a flash of recollection as your body gets drunk again in exactly the same fashion

The only risk to this surefire solution is that you might have to do it again tomorrow morning

[buzzard]

What kind of lighting conditions are people sleeping in that they may be viewed from some bedside seating arrangement?

You'd need to eat an entire carrot farm to see me at my most vulnerable.

[LaBelle]

I always have a faint light on otherwise I can't sleep.

[teh b0lly!!1]

Originally Posted by buzzard

What kind of lighting conditions are people sleeping in that they may be viewed from some bedside seating arrangement?

You'd need to eat an entire carrot farm to see me at my most vulnerable.

for especially dark rooms i like to use my night vision goggles

http://topics.info.com/image/400x200...ion_goggle.jpg

[Shallowed]

I slept through my alarm this morning. But I dreamed that I was watching My Bloody Valentine playing Blown a Wish live so that was cool. It was only when it repeated that I realised I was dreaming and woke up.

[FoolofaTook]

Yo yo check this line out from the Gita. The Bhagavad Gita.

"Bound by a hundred snares of hope..."

Pretty intense huh