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Old 04-19-2008, 12:21 AM   #1
sickbadthing
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Default Contest: find the weirdest match.com person in your area

and post their profile here.

That's right, we need to make fun of lonely losers. You know, other than the ones already on this board.

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 12:22 AM   #2
???
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sean did this better

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 12:23 AM   #3
sickbadthing
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oh yeah WELL GET ON A PLANE AND GO SUCK HIS BALLS

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 12:53 AM   #4
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Definitely not "weird" but a good example of all the broads around Seattle:

http://pictures.match.com/pictures/42/21/49164221A.jpeg

Me: Too fabulous for words, but, if forced to articulate my attributes, I'd have to say creativity, ambition, individualism, moxie, and sardonic sense of humor rank at the top. Am I humble? Absolutely not, but neither are you. I am only interested in knowing people who can fully appreciate me - to do that, you'll be discerning and equally confident, strong but never controlling (nor do you feel the need to be), and able to level me with just a glance.

I am a political writer/contemporary military historian (no, I am not pro-military...I could probably most aptly be described as a bleeding heart liberal) and am unarguably happiest when surrounded by stacks and stacks of (good) books. I work like a maniac and play even harder, and am always up for just about anything.

You: Absolutely fabulous. Wicked smart, brilliant to be exact, devastatingly handsome, absolutely hysterical, nonconformist.

P.S. If you like Bill O'Reilly, don't even bother.

"Throughout the centuries there were men who took first steps down new roads armed with nothing but their own vision. Their goals differed, but they all had this in common: that the step was first, the road new, and the response they received - hatred. The great creators - the thinkers, the artists, the scientists, the inventors - stood alone against the men of their time...but the men of unborrowed vision went ahead. They fought, they suffered, and they paid. But they won." –Ayn Rand
About me

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:03 AM   #5
Mablak
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That was pretty hilarious, after reading a few sentences I was completely expecting a reference to ayn rand, and without fail there it was. I actually admire a lot of things about ayn rand, but people who turn into pompous fucks after reading atlas shrugged are unbearably ridiculous.

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:06 AM   #6
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im bringing casey's automatic weapons next time i come see you. not for you, but for THEM. do you think they will be easy to find? from rooftops? drive-bys?

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:08 AM   #7
smashingjj
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HAH

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:16 AM   #8
sickbadthing
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Quote:
Originally Posted by noyen View Post
im bringing casey's automatic weapons next time i come see you. not for you, but for THEM. do you think they will be easy to find? from rooftops? drive-bys?
they're all in capitol hill where pam lives

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:16 AM   #9
28if
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lol at quoting Ayn Rand in your "About Me."

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:20 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sickbadthing View Post
they're all in capitol hill where pam lives
man. i really miss pam alot. do you see her often? im bummed i didnt get to see her when i was up there for that longer stay. i wanna come up again in the summer.

i dont even have a picture of her. do you have any of her per chance? not to beat off to or anything. i just miss seeing her tons. everytime i go to the book store i get sad she isnt there anymore.

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:28 AM   #11
sickbadthing
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Quote:
Originally Posted by noyen View Post
man. i really miss pam alot. do you see her often? im bummed i didnt get to see her when i was up there for that longer stay. i wanna come up again in the summer.

i dont even have a picture of her. do you have any of her per chance? not to beat off to or anything. i just miss seeing her tons. everytime i go to the book store i get sad she isnt there anymore.
you should visit again. i saw pam last week for a couple of beers.

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:30 AM   #12
sickbadthing
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I've moved on to The Stranger personals because these chicks are better.

http://thestranger.selectalternative...d3757fb3cf.jpg


Wanna thumb wrestle?

You: Give a shit about something, anything--make something cool, save the world, drink with gusto, love your grandma, SOMETHING! There is no excuse for being boring--the world is way to interesting and complicated to warrant it. For reals though--get creative, bitches!

Me: I'm bright, funny, sexy, capable, kinda loud, passionate, active, kind, interesting, a bit kooky. I have hella love for the people and the world and don't even have to be drunk to say "Dude, no really, I love you, man."

Recently left my woman of 7 years to get on with the business of livin' and I'm ready for a change of pace. I am back on the penis and need me a little springtime action.

Equally comfortable in a hot mini skirt or trashed Carharts. I love my job, my friends, my dogs, food and cooking (I'm damn good at it) and Jameson on the rocks.

I think I'm pretty much awesome, maybe you will too!

Disponible en espanol

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:41 AM   #13
julie
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i looked and i just started feeling bad for all the nerdy dudes. though all the guys on the stranger are pompous artsy jerks.

oh i hope this link works:
http://thestranger.selectalternative...=oid%3A1449677

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:43 AM   #14
sickbadthing
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Quote:
Originally Posted by julie View Post
i looked and i just started feeling bad for all the nerdy dudes. though all the guys on the stranger are pompous artsy jerks.

oh i hope this link works:
http://thestranger.selectalternative...=oid%3A1449677
well she is 22... still... christ

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:49 AM   #15
sickbadthing
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http://thestranger.selectalternative...43c3db718b.jpg

boo ya

I am a human, a feminist, and an astronaut. I am 100% Mongolian. Movie genres that I enjoy are Drama, Romance, and Sci-Fi. I love basking at the beauty in the world around me. I love going to the beach and watching a beautiful sunset and listening to the soothing sound of the waves against the water. I am a hopeless romantic. I love being in love. It is the most ostentatious and profound feeling on the planet and the universe. I believe in the power of love. Love can overcome any obstacle that comes its way. It lasts eternally. I am an eternal optimist. Some people may say that at times I can be overly maudlin or euphoric, but I say that I am one of the most intellectual, beautiful, expressive, and deepest women on the planet. Maybe in the universe. I am one in a million. I am the brightest, most glowing diamond you will discover in a cave full of many.
I am deep. Like, 20,000 leagues. If you are unable to appreciate the intensity in which I lead my life I probably don't want to know you. When I am not busy with school and work, I enjoy indulging in crack cocaine sessions with my dearest friends, skydiving naked, swimming with dolphins in the pacific in my most natural state, and playing cello without wearing clothes.. We should all just be naked, all the time.
ps. i'm not mogolian
Deeper

What songs would be on the soundtrack of your life? pussy

What's something you want to do but haven't? furry sex

One book everyone should read is: the bible.
Fill It

Design your ideal mate: the brain of vin diesel and the body of a man without a body

My guiltiest pleasure is ... are mandy moore movies

The quickest way to my heart is left boob The quickest way to my bed is reading to me out loud gay lord of the ring fan fiction And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked with cock

Great sex calls for lots of monica

It's Sunday morning at 10 a.m. If I'm not still sleeping, I'm dreaming of you baby

When I die, I believe I will go stamp collecting

For delicious results, add one part sugar and mix it with one part spice

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:53 AM   #16
sickbadthing
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Default

God... I hate every fucking person in Seattle.


http://thestranger.selectalternative...5629f13904.jpg
http://thestranger.selectalternative...b54d31ea2d.jpg
http://thestranger.selectalternative...ee1e7514c2.jpg
http://thestranger.selectalternative...48012f8ffa.jpg

Blah, blah, blah!
Describing oneself has always struck me as rather narcissistic. Basically its the opportunity to ramble on about bullshit regarding ones life that may or may not be fact or fiction. You're supposed to be entertaining yet personal, but not too personal! I guess that would be me; im blunt. I hate pretension, yet am told i come off as pretentious. I am a highly skeptical individual. Despite all this however I am human and do enjoy my passions and good times. I will save these things for you to find out about ;-)!
Deeper

If you could have a dinner party and invite any 4 people, dead or alive, who'd be coming? Johhny depp, Sean connery, Trent Reznor, and malcom x.

Where are your local haunts? CHAC, dillatant, saitos, the baltic room. volenteer park, gasworks park

What kind of person are you attracted to? Prefferibly people in my age range ( 22-35). I like men who are in shape and adventurous who have active imaginations and lives. Intellect is essential. I adore affection, passion and lust. A man who has good style and takes care of himself is a must. Someone with little to no hang ups who i can have a good time with rather than dealing with their immaterial baggage!

What songs would be on the soundtrack of your life? asilos magdalena- the mars volta, Neostatasis- subtractive lad, Atomantage- gridlock, Chasm- implex and mav, the end of time- ben sage, Epiphony -staind; truthfully i could go on for decades. Music is possibly the best thing in my life right now and there are no limits to any style or artist that i will fall in love with.

What's something you want to do but haven't? Hangliding, visit brazil, etc.

If I could change one thing about Seattle, it would be: lack of a lightrail

One book everyone should read is: 1984, it is a necessary read in times such as these.

One movie everyone should see is: bladerunner
Fill It

I consider myself an open-minded person, but my deal breakers are Morons and the closed minded

Design your ideal mate: the brain of Albert Einstein and the body of Johnny depp

I want to make a t-shirt that says If you can read this, please go away!

Something I said I'd never do but did anyway was post on the stranger

My guiltiest pleasure is online shopping, nordstroms, sushi and fair trade organic chocolate ;-)

Great sex calls for lots of biting, asphixiation, different posistions, and energy!

It's Sunday morning at 10 a.m. If I'm not still sleeping, I'm jogging

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 01:58 AM   #17
sickbadthing
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nice... dorks my age trying to find a date...

http://thestranger.selectalternative...92223892f4.jpg
http://thestranger.selectalternative...f2cb7c4d26.jpg
UTILIKILT!!!!!!!!!!!
http://thestranger.selectalternative...335f2fb675.jpg

Bookworm Adventurer

'a bookworm adventurer who can say "brains" and "guts" in 27 languages...' (if you know where that quote came from without resorting to google, you have a leg up.)


I'm a NW guy next door who originally escaped from Phoenix. I love technology and my job lets me play with plenty of cool toys. I am one with my geekiness but it doesn't mean I play video games all day, to the contrary I'd rather do something fun with the people I care about.


I am: smart, funny (sometimes dark or filthy sense of humor), shy at times, happy, good listener, honest, independent, enjoy my work, well read and sensual. I'm loyal to my friends and a majority of them are women. Physically: tall, in shape, size 11 feet, not graceful but not clumsy, no supermodel but more like Clive Owen. I like who I am.


I like: to paint (canvas, walls, etc.), hiking, biking ,cooking, reading (thought provoking non-fiction, graphic novels aka comics, scifi/fantasy, research, cereal boxes), seeing bands play (national and local), invent things, watching favorite TV shows (like ER, Battlestar Galactica, Heroes, House, The Closer, Southpark), traveling, swimming/working out, play board games with friends, good movies, see inspired art, good food, volunteer in the community. Also pretty handy, been known to build things from scratch.


furballs: I have one tremendously cool cat named Geddy. He is a character and gets along well with other animals (and most people).


you are: intelligent, have a sense of humor, not self absorbed, wonder at the universe, enjoy sci-fi/fantasy, love creating interesting ideas that may or may not make sense, aware of your impact on the world. You see beauty in many ways.
Deeper

If you could have a dinner party and invite any 4 people, dead or alive, who'd be coming? Émilie du Châtelet, Albert Einstein, Janeane Garofalo and Richard Dean Anderson

Where are your local haunts? Hatties Hat, Triangle Cafe, People's Pub, Sunset Bowl, Viking Tavern, Elysian, Matador, The Sloop

My radio dial is usually tuned to: my ipod.
Fill It

I consider myself an open-minded person, but my deal breakers are ignorance and liars

Something I learned from the last person I dated is to enjoy the simple pleasures

If I could take back one thing I said this week it would be what happened to your hair!

Design your ideal mate: the brain of Tina Fey and the body of Lisa Loeb (or vice versa)

I want to make a t-shirt that says Enslave Ballard

My idea of a great date is talking and laughing

When stuck in gridlock I go crazy and start singing

My guiltiest pleasure is bacon, bacon, bacon

The first section I turn to in the Stranger is Savage Love

The quickest way to my heart is sincerity The quickest way to my bed is passionate kisses And in the morning, I like my eggs cooked with bacon

The last show I saw was 14/48

Great sex calls for lots of touching and passion

It's Sunday morning at 10 a.m. If I'm not still sleeping, I'm snuggling or reading

When I die, I believe I will go to the compost pile of life

One sport I will never get is Golf

When I was a kid, I actually owned a purple bicycle

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:00 AM   #18
KnowingSheWould
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size 11 feet lol

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:06 AM   #19
sickbadthing
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http://thestranger.selectalternative...21c6ebf1bd.jpg

I want to make a t-shirt that says TEXTOSTERONE (my men's book club)

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:16 AM   #20
MonteLDS
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why are you on match.com to start with

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:18 AM   #21
sickbadthing
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MonteLDS View Post


why are you on match.com to start with
because i'm going to CHEAT ON JULIE

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:24 AM   #22
noyen
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3 way sex, double dongs, tarps, baby oil. garment humping. cum gargling.

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:26 AM   #23
ciGarski
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I'm 100% Mongolian.




p.s. im not Mongolian.

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:29 AM   #24
sickbadthing
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http://thestranger.selectalternative...cc593ecef6.jpg
http://thestranger.selectalternative...365a062dfc.jpg
http://thestranger.selectalternative...8bedade190.jpg

It took me an awful long time to stop being embarrased by the "Geek" lable. Sometime after I hit 30 I decided to reclaim it.
After all. The second ecumenical(probably spelled that wrong) council of the Holy Roman Church mistranslated several things in the conversion from Hebrew to Latin to English.

It is not that the "Meek" will inherit the earth.. it is the "Geek" one little letter... changes ones whole outlook....Hebrew is such a difficult language anyway....

I'm just me. It has been a long journey. In high school I was not just a geek, I was a downright Nerd. The guy who in my high school class was voted class president and "most likely to succeed" currently is a stock boy at target. The kid that got stuffed into trash cans and was voted most likely to die in a computer related masturbation accident.. (boys can be cruel) manages 26 people on two teams and has the respect and trust of his Client Service VP...

All in all I'll take my life.

I'm moderately ADHD and have a tendency to obsess on projects. The upside is that it makes me very creative and I learn a lot of intersting things, the downside is I sometimes move on too quickly. Jack of all trades master of none.

Life is never boring, just distracting at times. And that makes it all the more fun.

What do I want? Such an open question such a small box. Not sure. Ending of a long term relationship in May of last year. Want to meet people and get out again. Tried OKCupid. Answered all 3502 questions availiable. According to them the nearest match within 100 miles is another old X now married.

There has to be another intelligent, creative, stable, fun, geek loving woman out there that can deal with a man whos conversations can start silly switch to political, move to serious, end up at bizzare, and dash back to silly.
Deeper

What is something that people are surprised to find out about you? I brew my own beer, can make my own soap, make most of my own candles, can bake bread from memory, periodically make large batches of "chapstick" cuz it is 3 cents to make and paying $1.99 a piece ticks me off, and when the mood hits my own yogurt. Anyone wana learn how to make Meade with me?

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:30 AM   #25
sickbadthing
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and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt and when the mood hits my own yogurt

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:31 AM   #26
sickbadthing
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is it me or does he have a hard on with the cat

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:32 AM   #27
noyen
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his toes are curling. he's really hard. those look like some sniggly britches too.

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:34 AM   #28
wHATcOLOR
THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!
 
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holy shit, the prospect of online dating makes me unhappy. blather on about yourself and pretend you've got the world by the balls. call me old fashioned, but i think it'd to take a whole lot of failure before i end up resorting to that

 
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Old 04-19-2008, 02:36 AM   #29
sickbadthing
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Quote:
Originally Posted by noyen View Post
his toes are curling. he's really hard. those look like some sniggly britches too.


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Old 04-19-2008, 02:40 AM   #30
ciGarski
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Iowa ftw.

http://pictures.match.com/pictures/34/76/42933476Z.jpeg

Exercise habits:
  • Exercise 3-4 times per week
Daily diet:
  • Keep it healthy
Occupation:
  • Executive / Management

 
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