Netphoria Message Board


Go Back   Netphoria Message Board > Archives > General Chat Archive
Register Netphoria's Amazon.com Link Members List Mark Forums Read

 
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 12-13-2011, 02:45 AM   #1
bahnzah
Apocalyptic Poster
 
bahnzah's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,307
Default when ok cupid people reply to you nearly a year after your first message

it looks totally weak if you immediately reply to their reply, right?

 
bahnzah is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 02:49 AM   #2
null123
Minion of Satan
 
Location: bye
Posts: 7,266
Default

no. who waits a year

 
null123 is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 02:51 AM   #3
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

i never had this problem because nobody ever responded to my messages

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 02:51 AM   #4
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default


 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 02:54 AM   #5
Toby
Just Hook it to My Veins!
 
Toby's Avatar
 
Location: the mtns
Posts: 43,045
Arrow

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trotskilicious View Post
i never had this problem because nobody ever responded to my messages
Likewise

 
Toby is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 02:56 AM   #6
bahnzah
Apocalyptic Poster
 
bahnzah's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,307
Default

i have it better than i thought, then.

can you guys give me some samples of your messages? i can give u some tips.

 
bahnzah is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 02:57 AM   #7
Toby
Just Hook it to My Veins!
 
Toby's Avatar
 
Location: the mtns
Posts: 43,045
Default

"Wanna fuck?"

 
Toby is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:02 AM   #8
wHATcOLOR
THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!
 
wHATcOLOR's Avatar
 
Location: || MY NAME IS KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID ROCK!!
Posts: 47,245
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by bahnzah View Post
it looks totally weak if you immediately reply to their reply, right?
it does lack a certain symmetry

 
wHATcOLOR is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:05 AM   #9
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by bahnzah View Post
i have it better than i thought, then.

can you guys give me some samples of your messages? i can give u some tips.
"Hey, I'm Brendan. I was reading your profile and { brief evaluation of the common interests and etc, followed by a compliment }. I think we'd have a good time together. Talk to you later!"

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:06 AM   #10
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

also, before you ask i'm usually hitting on cute fat girls that look like they leave the house and have actual friends

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:07 AM   #11
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

the only messages i ever got were from mongo nerdos and i'd be like "well i can't be a beggar" and i'd ask them out to some east 6th bar or another and they'd all be like "oh no i don't like going out"

TOTAL FAIL SEE YOU LATER

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:09 AM   #12
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

there was another that i played txt footsie with for two weeks. well more like i'd listen to her whine about how lonely she is and how no boys like her and etc and i kept asking her out and she kept turning me down until one night she txted me with some whigning bullshit (again) about how her hot roommate always has boys and she's ever so lonely and i told her that maybe she should buy a vibrator cuz i don't give a fuuuuuuuuuuck and then i deleted her number

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:11 AM   #13
Eulogy
huh
 
Posts: 62,456
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trotskilicious View Post
there was another that i played txt footsie with for two weeks. well more like i'd listen to her whine about how lonely she is and how no boys like her and etc and i kept asking her out and she kept turning me down until one night she txted me with some whigning bullshit (again) about how her hot roommate always has boys and she's ever so lonely and i told her that maybe she should buy a vibrator cuz i don't give a fuuuuuuuuuuck and then i deleted her number
this person sounds terrible

 
Eulogy is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:13 AM   #14
null123
Minion of Satan
 
Location: bye
Posts: 7,266
Default

yeah I wanna smack her tbh

 
null123 is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:14 AM   #15
bahnzah
Apocalyptic Poster
 
bahnzah's Avatar
 
Posts: 1,307
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trotskilicious View Post
"Hey, I'm Brendan. I was reading your profile and { brief evaluation of the common interests and etc, followed by a compliment }. I think we'd have a good time together. Talk to you later!"
Hmm. I would say...

Lose the intro and the TTYL! parts. End on a question, so they have something to share about themselves. Keep it short so it doesn't feel like an obligation to read and reply to. Keep it short. Seriously short. 3 sentences max. Women have to comb through enough bullshit as it is.

 
bahnzah is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:19 AM   #16
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

yeah well i have to type enough bullshit on that site so don't worry about brevity

i mean once you sent your tenth message with no response you tend to just copy paste shit

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:20 AM   #17
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Eulogy View Post
this person sounds terrible
yeah i have to reiterate that she would text me first almost every time

BOO HOO I'M DRUNK I'M FAT I WANT TO CRY ABOUT BEING LONELY BUT I WANT SOMEONE HOTTER THAN YOU

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:20 AM   #18
wHATcOLOR
THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!
 
wHATcOLOR's Avatar
 
Location: || MY NAME IS KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID ROCK!!
Posts: 47,245
Default

Hi ******,

I'm disappointed in you. I'm disappointed that I haven't gotten a response to my voicemail and text messages. FYI, I suggest that you keep in mind that emails sound more impersonal, harsher, and are easier to misinterpret than in-person or phone communication. After all, people can't see someone's body language or tone of voice in an email. I'm not trying to be harsh, patronizing, or insulting in this email. I'm honest and direct by nature, and I'm going to be that way in this email. By the way, I did a google search, so that's how I came across your email.

I assume that you no longer want to go out with me. (If you do want to go out with me, then you should let me know.) I suggest that you make a sincere apology to me for giving me mixed signals. I feel led on by you.

Things that happened during our date *******, but are not limited to, the following:

-You played with your hair a lot. A woman playing with her hair is a common sign of flirtation. You can even do a google search on it. When a woman plays with her hair, she is preening. I've never had a date where a woman played with her hair as much as you did. In addition, it didn't look like you were playing with your hair out of nervousness.

-We had lots of eye contact during our date. On a per-minute basis, I've never had as much eye contact during a date as I did with you.

-You said, "It was nice to meet you." at the end of our date. A woman could say this statement as a way to show that she isn't interested in seeing a man again or she could mean what she said--that it was nice to meet you. The statement, by itself, is inconclusive.

-We had a nice conversation over dinner. I don't think I'm being delusional in saying this statement.

In my opinion, leading someone on (i.e., giving mixed signals) is impolite and immature. It's bad to do that.

Normally, I would not be asking for information if a woman and I don't go out again after a first date. However, in our case, I'm curious because I think our date went well and that there is a lot of potential for a serious relationship. Of course, it's difficult to predict what would happen, but I think there is a lot of potential for a serious relationship developing between us one day (or least there was before your non-response to my voicemail and text messages).

I think we should go out on a second date. In my opinion, our first date was good enough to lead to a second date.

Why am I writing you? Well, hopefully, we will go out again. Even if we don't, I gain utility from expressing my thoughts to you. In addition, even if you don't want to go out again, I would like to get feedback as to why you wouldn't want to go again. Normally, I wouldn't ask a woman for this type of feedback after a first date, but this is an exception given I think we have a lot of potential.

If you don't want to go again, then apparently you didn't think our first date was good enough to lead to a second date. Dating or a relationship is not a Hollywood movie. It's good to keep that in mind. In general, I thought the date went well and was expecting that we would go out on a second date.

If you're not interested in going out again, then I would have preferred if you hadn't given those mixed signals. I feel led on. We have a number of things in common. I'll name a few things: First, we’ve both very intelligent. Second, we both like classical music so much that we go to classical music performances by ourselves. In fact, the number one interest that I would want to have in common with a woman with whom I'm in a relationship is a liking of classical music. I wouldn't be seriously involved with a woman if she didn't like classical music. You said that you're planning to go the NY Philharmonic more often in the future.

As I said, I go to the NY Philharmonic often. You're very busy. It would be very convenient for you to date me because we have the same interests. We already go to classical music performances by ourselves. If we go to classical music performances together, it wouldn't take any significant additional time on your part. According to the internet, you're 33 or 32, so, at least from my point of view, we're a good match in terms of age. I could name more things that we have in common, but I'll stop here. I don't understand why you apparently don't want to go out with me again. We have numerous things in common. I assume that you find me physically attractive. If you didn't find me physically attractive, then it would have been irrational for you to go out with me in the first place. After all, our first date was not a blind date. You already knew what I looked like before our date. Perhaps, you're unimpressed that I manage my family’s investments and my own investments. Perhaps, you don’t think I have a "real" job. Well, I’ve done very well as an investment manager. I've made my parents several millions of dollars.

That's real money. That's not monopoly money. In my opinion, if I make real money, it's a real job. Donald Trump's children work for his company. Do they have "real" jobs? I think so. George Soros's sons help manage their family investments. Do they have "real" jobs? I think so. In addition, I’m both a right-brain and left-brain man, given that I’m both an investment manager and a philosopher/writer. That’s a unique characteristic; most people aren't like that. I've never been as disappointed and sad about having difficulty about getting a second date as I am with you. I've gone out with a lot of women in my life. (FYI, I'm not a serial dater. Sometimes, I've only gone out with a woman for one date.) People don’t grow on trees. I hope you appreciate the potential we have.

Am I sensitive person? Sure, I am. I think it's better to be sensitive than to be insensitive. There are too many impolite, insensitive people in the world.

I suggest that we continue to go out and see what happens. Needless to say, I find you less appealing now (given that you haven't returned my messages) than I did at our first date. However, I would be willing to go out with you again. I'm open minded and flexible and am willing to give you the benefit of the doubt. I wish you would give me the benefit of the doubt too. If you don't want to go out again, in my opinion, you would be making a big mistake, perhaps one of the biggest mistakes in your life. If you don’t want to go out again, then you should have called to tell me so. Even sending a text message would have been better than nothing. In my opinion, not responding to my messages is impolite, immature, passive aggressive, and cowardly. I spent time, effort, and money meeting you for dinner. Getting back to me in response to my messages would have been a reasonable thing for you to do. In addition, you arrived about 30 minutes late for our date. I'm sure you wouldn’t like it if a man showed up thirty minutes late for a first date with you.

If you're concerned that you will hurt my feelings by providing specific information about why you don't want to go with me again, well, my feeling are already hurt. I'm sad and disappointed about this situation. If you give information, at least I can understand the situation better. I might even learn something that is beneficial.

If you don't want to go out again, that I request that you call me and make a sincere apology for leading me on (i.e., giving me mixed signals). In my opinion, you shouldn't act that way toward a man and then not go out with him again. It's bad to play with your hair so much and make so much eye contact if you're not interested in going out with me again. I have tried to write this email well, but it's not perfect. Again, I'm not trying to be harsh, insulting, patronizing, etc. I'm disappointed, sad, etc. I would like to talk to you on the phone. I hope you will call me back at xxx-xxx-xxxx> (if it's inconvenient for you to talk on the phone when you read this email, you can let me know via email that you are willing to talk on the phone and I'll call you). If you get my voicemail, you can a leave a message and I can call you back. Even if you don't want to go out again, I would appreciate it if you give me the courtesy of calling me and talking to me. Yes, you might say things that hurt me, but my feelings are already hurt. Sending me an email response (instead of talking on the phone) would better than no response at all, but I think it would be better to talk on the phone. Email communication has too much potential for misinterpretation, etc.

Best, Mike

 
wHATcOLOR is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:24 AM   #19
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

man i would never blame any woman ever that didn't respond to that

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:26 AM   #20
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

Quote:
We had lots of eye contact during our date. On a per-minute basis, I've never had as much eye contact during a date as I did with you.
seriously

L
O
L

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:27 AM   #21
wHATcOLOR
THIS IS AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!
 
wHATcOLOR's Avatar
 
Location: || MY NAME IS KIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIID ROCK!!
Posts: 47,245
Default

i like how he feels the need to define everything, as if it were her first day on earth

 
wHATcOLOR is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:29 AM   #22
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

my gurl friend told me about some guy that started messaging her a day after their date and she didn't respond because she was like "well that's kind of weird" but then a couple days after that she got this kind of angry message from him complaing about how he knows she's logged on to the site and she can see his message and it was bullshit that she didn't respond and my gurl friend was all like "Should I have responded? Was I being rude?"

and my only response was, "No, that one is fucking insane."

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:31 AM   #23
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

ah nah

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:56 AM   #24
Luke de Spa
someone more...punk rock?
 
Luke de Spa's Avatar
 
Location: Ice cream pig out in M1-aud is why i don't play plug in baby the wrong way, like you
Posts: 22,182
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by wHATcOLOR View Post
Hi ******,

I'm disappointed in you. I'm disappointed that I haven't gotten a response to my voicemail and text messages. FYI, I suggest that you keep in mind that emails sound more impersonal, harsher, and are easier to misinterpret than in-person or phone communication. After all, people can't see someone's body language or tone of voice in an email.
aspergers?

still an asshole though

 
Luke de Spa is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 03:59 AM   #25
Luke de Spa
someone more...punk rock?
 
Luke de Spa's Avatar
 
Location: Ice cream pig out in M1-aud is why i don't play plug in baby the wrong way, like you
Posts: 22,182
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by bahnzah View Post
Hmm. I would say...

Lose the intro and the TTYL! parts. End on a question, so they have something to share about themselves. Keep it short so it doesn't feel like an obligation to read and reply to. Keep it short. Seriously short. 3 sentences max. Women have to comb through enough bullshit as it is.
this

i'd also nix the "i think we'd have a good time" part. the existence of your message ought to imply that

 
Luke de Spa is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 04:05 AM   #26
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

you know if not being responded to comes down to an intro and a phrase then they can eat shit tbh

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 04:24 AM   #27
Luke de Spa
someone more...punk rock?
 
Luke de Spa's Avatar
 
Location: Ice cream pig out in M1-aud is why i don't play plug in baby the wrong way, like you
Posts: 22,182
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Trotskilicious View Post
you know if not being responded to comes down to an intro and a phrase then they can eat shit tbh
wrong

i mean, uh, how's that be an unreasonable jerk thing working out for you so far

 
Luke de Spa is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 04:30 AM   #28
null123
Minion of Satan
 
Location: bye
Posts: 7,266
Default

just go to a message board with more women fuck okcupid

 
null123 is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 04:30 AM   #29
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

Luke you really don't see why it's kind of ridiculous to say that your messages would get responded to if you didn't have a few phrases, like introducing yourself or saying "we'll have a real good time" and "talk to you later." And if that is true (and it's definitely not) then fuck them anyway, because that's a ludicrous reason not to give someone a chance?

 
Trotskilicious is offline
Old 12-13-2011, 04:31 AM   #30
Trotskilicious
Banned
 
Trotskilicious's Avatar
 
Location: I believe in the transcendental qualities of friendship.
Posts: 39,439
Default

also the fact that you lecture me about being an unreasonable jerk all the time is kind of weird

 
Trotskilicious is offline
 


Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is Off
HTML code is On
Google


Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
shit fuckers can type! sickbadthing General Chat Message Board 60 05-23-2019 11:18 AM
is this intentional MCIS start/end song synch Grox Pumpkins Archive 32 04-12-2017 08:52 PM
Monthly dean_r_koontz appreciation / positive comments thread Warsaw General Chat Archive 10 12-06-2007 07:32 AM
Mr. Madonna sickbadthing General Chat Archive 23 09-20-2007 01:25 PM
Help with Mix CD for my Dad? shannon General Chat Archive 34 03-02-2006 12:02 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:09 AM.




Smashing Pumpkins, Alternative Music
& General Discussion Message Board and Forums
www.netphoria.org - Copyright © 1998-2022