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Old 09-01-2018, 08:11 AM   #91
yo soy el mejor
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Originally Posted by ilikeplanets View Post
i can't imagine this. i've gone up and down.....up and down......up and down, forever.
i fluctuate within a ~15 pound range. without trying i can easily drop to 91 and my heaviest was 112 in high school when i ate lots more kfc and had healthier bones or something.

i weighed myself in dallas and i was a smooth 103. my grandma called me fat.

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 05:27 PM   #92
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100 was my lowest weight EVER as an adult. i am definitely not in that range currently, but i'm not as big as i've ever been, either. it's a fun struggle

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 05:54 PM   #93
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you girls are TINY

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 05:57 PM   #94
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seriously

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 06:48 PM   #95
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I'm 145-150 at 5'7" and have been asked if i have an eating disorder. I don't take offense because this country has had their notion of a normal weight extremely skewed due to an obesity epidemic.

So, I look "skinny" at the weight/height ratio.

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 08:20 PM   #96
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I'm about 100...














































































KILOS!!! FUCK YES!

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 09:31 PM   #97
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you girls are TINY
Yeah, my 9 year old weighs about that much, 43 kgs. He's 150cm tall though, which makes him taller than some adults here in Singapore.

My 13 year old weighs 65kg, but he's 179cm tall and wears EU size 48 shoes. So he's taller than many adults, generally.

It's crazy thinking that both my children are now bigger than some adults. It happened so fast

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 09:33 PM   #98
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Originally Posted by FoolofaTook View Post
I'm about 100...














































































KILOS!!! FUCK YES!
That's a good weight for a guy who is what, 6'6"? My ex was about that tall but when we were dating he was always closer to 90kg and he was incredibly skinny and always freezing cold. He looks way healthier and happier now, with a few more pounds on him. He managed to marry a woman who could feed him, unlike me lol

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 09:37 PM   #99
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I think my worst health problems are panic attacks and symptoms related to them. I'm just in a constant state of anxiety, it sucks.

But then the medication causes life-shortening weight gain, which also sucks.

Can't medical researchers just fix me already?

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 10:26 PM   #100
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I think my worst health problems are panic attacks and symptoms related to them. I'm just in a constant state of anxiety, it sucks.

But then the medication causes life-shortening weight gain, which also sucks.

Can't medical researchers just fix me already?
I don't know you at all but my wife had similar stuff going on and she benefited a lot by the short term benzo and long term lexapro and is a nurse now. I took medications when I tried to sober up at 30 and started freaking out and it made it WAY worse. I literally lost 2 years where I was barely able to leave the house because I was trying to make this or that anxiety medication work and was taking benzos just to make it to my teaching gigs. Eventually, I got off all of it and went back to school and felt better about myself. BUT my wife who is a super solid nurse, absolutely needs her low dosage of lexapro to prevent her from having panic attacks. And she has probably only taken 10 benzos in 2 years. I dunno, I'm not in charge of her benzos That anxiety stuff is a mess, and the only right answer as far as what you should take and do is what you think the right answer is. The less you second guess yourself the better. Good luck!

 
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Old 09-01-2018, 10:34 PM   #101
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Originally Posted by vixnix View Post
That's a good weight for a guy who is what, 6'6"? My ex was about that tall but when we were dating he was always closer to 90kg...
yeah i'm actually around 90 kgs. only time i was 100 was in jail as an inmate worker. i ate good.


 
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Old 09-01-2018, 10:45 PM   #102
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benzos are great

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 04:20 AM   #103
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Originally Posted by FoolofaTook View Post
yeah i'm actually around 90 kgs. only time i was 100 was in jail as an inmate worker. i ate good.

Edibles?

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 04:21 AM   #104
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Joking lol

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 07:14 AM   #105
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i remember telling my mother, "i hope you stay 31 forever", and she said something like ~"you want me to die?". that was surprising. i guess i was around 6.

other that than i have no memory of things before 8 or 9. just impressions here and there like coloring in a book almost bigger than me. a chess piece dance party on the chess board. and sitting in a chair made of bricks while wearing a mud mask in the backyard like queen of the kids.

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 10:38 AM   #106
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Originally Posted by FoolofaTook View Post
yeah i'm actually around 90 kgs. only time i was 100 was in jail as an inmate worker. i ate good.

He might have been even lighter than 90kg...I'm not sure. You need someone to cook for you!! He used to cook for the both of us, I couldn't even make lentil soup when I met him. He taught me a lot of what I know about cooking before he dumped me, and I brought all of those skills with me to my marriage so at least I can (over)feed my husband and children...

Look for a girl who has just been dumped by a tall guy who cooks really well, that's my best advice.

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 10:41 AM   #107
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Originally Posted by lawson View Post
I don't know you at all but my wife had similar stuff going on and she benefited a lot by the short term benzo and long term lexapro and is a nurse now. I took medications when I tried to sober up at 30 and started freaking out and it made it WAY worse. I literally lost 2 years where I was barely able to leave the house because I was trying to make this or that anxiety medication work and was taking benzos just to make it to my teaching gigs. Eventually, I got off all of it and went back to school and felt better about myself. BUT my wife who is a super solid nurse, absolutely needs her low dosage of lexapro to prevent her from having panic attacks. And she has probably only taken 10 benzos in 2 years. I dunno, I'm not in charge of her benzos That anxiety stuff is a mess, and the only right answer as far as what you should take and do is what you think the right answer is. The less you second guess yourself the better. Good luck!
I took lexapro for a year, and stacked on about 20 kg. It worked fine, but there's only so many years that I can continue to put on 20kg before I die, you know? It's not the easiest thing in the world to get rid of afterwards, either.

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 10:41 AM   #108
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Heh thanks. I am gaining weight, probably put on 10lbs this summer. My parents finally got the memo that I am trying to change so they are buying more protein.

I love lentil soup. It's one of the few dishes I can make. I make it once a week. Now if I could only convince my dad to switch to brown rice with it instead of white rice...

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 11:00 AM   #109
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I'm glad your parents are buying more protein...good luck trying to change the choices of a middle aged man, that never seems to be easy.

Lentil soup is truly great.

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 01:01 PM   #110
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i make a pretty good one. i'm a decent cook in general, but i hate cooking healthy. i like EATING healthy, but not cooking it. make sense?

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 01:18 PM   #111
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middle aged man??? is this some kind of a sick joke?

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 06:52 PM   #112
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thinking I should see a doctor about my anxiety but I'm not getting old

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 07:06 PM   #113
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do it but don't get hooked on benzos

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 07:09 PM   #114
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so for a long time i wasn't taking my medicines as religiously as i should have... always took my night ones, but my morning ones (wellbutrin and cymbalta) was more like... half the time). so i started being a good girl and taking them all the time and surprise... after 2 weeks i feel better. i'm actually a bit overstimulated, a little insomnia, but i'm eating better (less) and have more energy then i've felt in a while. work isn't a slog. etc.

but for the first time it feels really artificial to me. like... i don't feel zombie-ish (quite the opposite), but it almost seems idk, too easy. i've been struggling for a while, nothing terrible but a bit unstable and all i needed to do was take my damn medicine. i'm also doing good stuff in therapy, feeling much more open than i ever have. really looking forward to my surgery in a few months also.

i think i struggle when i feel good because i feel like i deserve to feel like shit, and i worry about feeling better and then it going away. or as i've always interpreted cilly borgan as meaning

"Happiness will make you wonder
Will I feel OK?
It scares the disenchanted
Far away"

i wouldn't say I feel HAPPY but i feel like i have an adequate drive to do things like clean and work without it all seeming like a terrible chore. which it has for a long time, on meds or off meds
we'll see if it stays this way.

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 07:12 PM   #115
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Originally Posted by D. View Post
I'm 145-150 at 5'7" and have been asked if i have an eating disorder. I don't take offense because this country has had their notion of a normal weight extremely skewed due to an obesity epidemic.

So, I look "skinny" at the weight/height ratio.
i'm 150 at 5'11" but thankfullly no one thinks i have a eating disorder… if i get a belly i'll look horrible because everything else will have stayed the same.

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 07:32 PM   #116
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do it but don't get hooked on benzos
how easily is it to get prescribed them I have this irrational picture of the doc calling me a wimpy fraud and then shoving me into a locker

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 08:44 PM   #117
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reading this has made me feel better about myself

i have a crappy shoulder that limits how good i can do at gym stuff, but its workable. from getting tackled by a 350 lb dude in college in a no pads football game. i was probably like 130lb. couldn't open doors with that arm for a week.

i have trouble getting up in the mornings and focusing, but caffeine seems to help. regular old person stuff. maybe i should be prescribed a stimulant

i had a dark period around xmas before i left for SE Asia for 3 months, and made the foolish decision to start Zoloft 1 week before a trans pacific flight. its the most anxiety i have ever experienced and i was unable to leave my room even when there was a beach 20 feet away. fuck meds. doing much better without that

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 09:55 PM   #118
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how easily is it to get prescribed them I have this irrational picture of the doc calling me a wimpy fraud and then shoving me into a locker
i don't really know anymore. it used to be common practice to be given a small amount with an SSRI to kinda bridge the gap before the SSRI starts working but idk if they'd give that unless you were actually having panic attacks.

but benzos have been reclassified in the scheduling system so idk if they are being prescribed the same anymore. plus you can't get refills, only new prescriptions allowed

 
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Old 09-02-2018, 10:12 PM   #119
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Originally Posted by Dogfighter28 View Post
reading this has made me feel better about myself

i have a crappy shoulder that limits how good i can do at gym stuff, but its workable. from getting tackled by a 350 lb dude in college in a no pads football game. i was probably like 130lb. couldn't open doors with that arm for a week.

i have trouble getting up in the mornings and focusing, but caffeine seems to help. regular old person stuff. maybe i should be prescribed a stimulant

i had a dark period around xmas before i left for SE Asia for 3 months, and made the foolish decision to start Zoloft 1 week before a trans pacific flight. its the most anxiety i have ever experienced and i was unable to leave my room even when there was a beach 20 feet away. fuck meds. doing much better without that
PITCHFORK READER BYRON BARNES


 
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Old 09-02-2018, 11:24 PM   #120
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I took lexapro for a year, and stacked on about 20 kg. It worked fine, but there's only so many years that I can continue to put on 20kg before I die, you know? It's not the easiest thing in the world to get rid of afterwards, either.
I hear ya. It took me a long time to get from 215 to 195 which is still a tiny bit overweight. I'm tall but I'm not beefcake so big middle strong legs skinny arms. My point on lexapro and all that stuff really is I used to be really judgmental about it until I saw my wife succeed because of it. But man, it WRECKED me mentally. The only reason I weathered that time in my life was because I was able to make some easy money teaching piano. So it's really person to person.

 
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