Post your favorite Dennis Miller quotes here

bonsor · 11-07-2002, 06:12 PM

"This thing [O.J. Simpson Trial] is going slower than Jimmy Stewart reciting the Mahabharata on the back of an arthritic tortise that is munching a quaalude on a humid sunday afternoon in a hammock hung between two trees in the intensified gravity of the planet Jupiter."

"Now I was your average student in high school. I got more C's than a mexican couple reaching simultaneous orgasm."

"The only reason Steely Dan's new album sold so well this year is because the old farts who bought it still haven't figured out how to download it for free."

beef curtains · 11-07-2002, 06:13 PM

http://www.wsu.edu/~swinn/seizure.gif

bonsor · 11-07-2002, 06:14 PM

"Shannon is a fat bitch" - Dennis Miller

beef curtains · 11-07-2002, 06:16 PM

******, replies like that are why you win the award.

don't worry, you don't have to compete anymore, i already granted it to you.
save your efforts for someone else

Affect · 11-07-2002, 06:16 PM

DML

Experts recommend building your confidence by finding some small, fun task you're good at, and making it your hobby. In my case, it's tearing down the self-esteem of those around me in barely perceptible ways. That way, I can increase my relative self-confidence twice as fast.

bonsor · 11-07-2002, 06:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by So very sad about me
******, replies like that are why you win the award.

don't worry, you don't have to compete anymore, i already granted it to you.
save your efforts for someone else

Seeking your mensa-class approval is a goal of mine. I am suicidally disappointed with myself.

beef curtains · 11-07-2002, 06:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ******
Seeking your mensa-class approval is a goal of mine. I am suicidally disappointed with myself.

OMG HOW OLD ARE YOU!!!! I HAVEN'T CRACKED A MENSA JOKE SINCE I WAS A PRICK BACK IN HIGH SCHOOL

AGHAGAGAGAGHAHAHAHAAAAAA

bonsor · 11-07-2002, 06:24 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by So very sad about me

OMG HOW OLD ARE YOU!!!! I HAVEN'T CRACKED A MENSA JOKE SINCE I WAS A PRICK BACK IN HIGH SCHOOL

You say 'prick' like it's a bad thing.

Seriously. What the fuck do you think my goal is here? Am I here to help create a happy haven on the internet where children play and frolic in the dasies?

bonsor · 11-07-2002, 06:38 PM

"The biggest problem facing citizens of the third world is one quite literally of their own making, and that is over-population. Hey folks one way to conserve precious energy is to NOT FUCK EVERY 12 SECONDS. I have to admit I get a little angry when I read about the starving family consisting of a mother, father and TWENTY-THREE CHILDREN. Fer chrissakes lady, it's a vagina, not a clown car."

beef curtains · 11-07-2002, 08:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ******
You say 'prick' like it's a bad thing.

Seriously. What the fuck do you think my goal is here? Am I here to help create a happy haven on the internet where children play and frolic in the dasies?

I Think that's why we clash ******.....we're trying to share the same job and it just doesn't work

bonsor · 11-07-2002, 09:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by So very sad about me

I Think that's why we clash ******.....we're trying to share the same job and it just doesn't work

ok. we'll pretend we never have this conversation.

starting now.

fuck you.

11-07-2002, 06:12 PM	#1
bonsor Minion of Satan Location: midwest Posts: 8,771	Post your favorite Dennis Miller quotes here "This thing [O.J. Simpson Trial] is going slower than Jimmy Stewart reciting the Mahabharata on the back of an arthritic tortise that is munching a quaalude on a humid sunday afternoon in a hammock hung between two trees in the intensified gravity of the planet Jupiter." "Now I was your average student in high school. I got more C's than a mexican couple reaching simultaneous orgasm." "The only reason Steely Dan's new album sold so well this year is because the old farts who bought it still haven't figured out how to download it for free."

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11-07-2002, 06:13 PM	#2
beef curtains Immortal Location: I like me so much better when you're naked Posts: 21,752	http://www.wsu.edu/~swinn/seizure.gif

11-07-2002, 06:14 PM	#3
bonsor Minion of Satan Location: midwest Posts: 8,771	"Shannon is a fat bitch" - Dennis Miller

11-07-2002, 06:16 PM	#4
beef curtains Immortal Location: I like me so much better when you're naked Posts: 21,752	******, replies like that are why you win the award. don't worry, you don't have to compete anymore, i already granted it to you. save your efforts for someone else

11-07-2002, 06:16 PM	#5
Affect Fuck Location: xxx Posts: 5,360	DML Experts recommend building your confidence by finding some small, fun task you're good at, and making it your hobby. In my case, it's tearing down the self-esteem of those around me in barely perceptible ways. That way, I can increase my relative self-confidence twice as fast.

11-07-2002, 06:38 PM	#9
bonsor Minion of Satan Location: midwest Posts: 8,771	"The biggest problem facing citizens of the third world is one quite literally of their own making, and that is over-population. Hey folks one way to conserve precious energy is to NOT FUCK EVERY 12 SECONDS. I have to admit I get a little angry when I read about the starving family consisting of a mother, father and TWENTY-THREE CHILDREN. Fer chrissakes lady, it's a vagina, not a clown car."