Am I an asshole? (not in general but this situation)

12-29-2003, 08:42 PM

Ok, so here's the story.

I met this girl about a year ago now. we went out once or twice back then. i just stopped calling her. i ended up calling her like 3 or 4 months after out of boredom and we went out once (movie/apetizers after) and hooked up (just some REAL light kissing) and then i never called her again. THEN i called her in August at total random and we talked for about an hour or so, granted i was also drunk at the time and once again, called her out of boredom. we didn't speak after.

Flash forward to this past Saturday. I txted her a few times on her phone, yes i was slightly intoxicated, and said i wanted to call her and we should go out. she seemed game to, as i still have the msgs on my phone.

My question is.... this girl is a pretty nice girl and i am 99% sure a virgin also. Do i call her this thursday like i was thinking of doing? or just never call her again and delete her number? she's nice and a pretty fun person but i seem to be messing with her, calling her every few months and all.

Fall Down Blue · 12-29-2003, 08:43 PM

dude youre just playing your cards, youre not an asshole. i say you nail that shit and never look back.

holla at your boy

dusty · 12-29-2003, 08:45 PM

will you stop with the virgins already!!! shame on you

Debaser · 12-29-2003, 08:50 PM

you're only an asshole if this girl actually wants a relationship with you. if she is on the same page with you in terms of just wanting to mess around and nothing serious, then its all good, playa.

12-29-2003, 08:51 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Debaser
you're only an asshole if this girl actually wants a relationship with you. if she is on the same page with you in terms of just wanting to mess around and nothing serious, then its all good, playa.

seeing as she is nice, i would almost bet she would want a relationship. she seemed to actually like me, why else would she keep allowing herself to hang out w/ me

Debaser · 12-29-2003, 08:53 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ******

seeing as she is nice, i would almost bet she would want a relationship. she seemed to actually like me, why else would she keep allowing herself to hang out w/ me

well if you can tell that she really wants to be your girlfriend and all that, then you an asshole! hahahaah.

:erm

GreenEggsNSpam · 12-29-2003, 08:58 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fall Down Blue
i say you nail that shit and never look back.

BlueStar · 12-29-2003, 08:59 PM

Delete her number and never ever talk to her ever again. (Alternatively, the nicer thing to do would be to tell her via some means (calling, text message, whatever) that you got back together with an ex-girlfriend or something...this way she has been given a reason as to why you are no longer contacting her.) Don't screw around with her like that...if you don't actually want a relationship with her (which I'm betting is what she wants...from what little she said, she doesn't seem like the no-strings/no emotions hook-up kind of girl, which means that she is putting up your behavior and still talking to you because she really likes you, which probably means that she has been hurt on some level each time you've suddenly stopped contact with her), just let it go.

mirrar · 12-29-2003, 09:21 PM

you're not an asshole. i don't understand why everone thinks there should be this written in stone protocal about relationships or whatever. so what if you call her every couple months and kissed her? if she starts calling you all the time and making hardcore advances on you and you keep doing this, then yeah it's a shitty thing to do. other then that don't worry about it!

Axis of Action · 12-29-2003, 09:24 PM

People need to be more vocal. Stop this beating-around-the-bush shit. If she hasn't said "WTF, I wanna date you, stop dating me once every 4 months," then don't worry about it.

scouse_dave · 09:47 PM

well...however you've treated this girl up until this point...the girl obviously doesn't mind/thinks it's an acceptable way to be treated. maybe she doesn't read anything into it when you phone her and ask her out. so....in that case, maybe you should keep on keeping on.

having said that, i had a similar situation with a girl once...and it just made me feel bad in the end. i tried to wash my hands of her altogether in the end.

2Marlon2Brando · 12-29-2003, 09:26 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by scouse_dave
i had a similar situation with a girl once...and it just made me feel bad in the end. i tried to wash my hands of her altogether in the end.

Did you kill her?

Axis of Action · 12-29-2003, 09:27 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by scouse_dave
well...however you've treated this girl up until this point...the girl obviously doesn't mind/think it's an acceptable way to be treated. maybe she doesn't read anything into it when you phone her and ask her out. so....in that case, maybe you should keep on keeping on.

having said that, i had a similar situation with a girl once...and it just made me feel bad in the end. i tried to wash my hands of her altogether in the end.

Happened to me too. I kind of wanted to date her, and she really wanted to date me. We tried it a couple times, it just never worked out. I just never felt wholly comfortable with her.

12-29-2003, 09:31 PM

wow... thanks netphoria. i appreciate the insightful responses. i'll probably call her. what the hell.... it's not like i have anything better early next week and she was always at least nice.

scouse_dave · 12-29-2003, 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 2Marlon2Brando
Did you kill her?

i think so, yeah...she was bleeding a whole lot when i left her in the alley...

meow · 12-29-2003, 10:49 PM

I would say no, but unfortunately this phrase made me change my mind:

Quote:

Originally posted by ******
.

Flash forward to this past Saturday.

a nice guy doesn't say "Flash Forward"

2Marlon2Brando · 12-29-2003, 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by scouse_dave
i think so, yeah...she was bleeding a whole lot when i left her in the alley...

?

sawdust restaurants · 12-29-2003, 10:57 PM

stop manipulating her, man.

meow · 12-29-2003, 10:58 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 2Marlon2Brando

?

aw shannon is so cute (shes even cuter WITHOUT the black eye!)

12-30-2003, 03:34 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Sehki
People need to be more vocal. Stop this beating-around-the-bush shit. If she hasn't said "WTF, I wanna date you, stop dating me once every 4 months," then don't worry about it.

If she hasn't seemed annoyed or really desperate to talk to you each time you contact her, then you have no problem at all.

Anyone who is unable to speak up for what they want or make known their intentions deserves whatever they have coming to them.

Fattening Ass · 12-30-2003, 03:37 AM

what was said earlier seemed to be right on. If she doesn't already have a problem with these sporatic calls and visits, then it seems fair game, as it seems she's fine with it being like that.

Axis of Action · 12-30-2003, 03:50 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fattening Ass
what was said earlier seemed to be right on. If she doesn't already have a problem with these sporatic calls and visits, then it seems fair game, as it seems she's fine with it being like that.

Exactly. You ain't a mind-reader, son. She doesn't say nothin', you do whatever the hell you want.

12-29-2003, 08:42 PM	#1
Quagmire Posts: n/a	Am I an asshole? (not in general but this situation) Ok, so here's the story. I met this girl about a year ago now. we went out once or twice back then. i just stopped calling her. i ended up calling her like 3 or 4 months after out of boredom and we went out once (movie/apetizers after) and hooked up (just some REAL light kissing) and then i never called her again. THEN i called her in August at total random and we talked for about an hour or so, granted i was also drunk at the time and once again, called her out of boredom. we didn't speak after. Flash forward to this past Saturday. I txted her a few times on her phone, yes i was slightly intoxicated, and said i wanted to call her and we should go out. she seemed game to, as i still have the msgs on my phone. My question is.... this girl is a pretty nice girl and i am 99% sure a virgin also. Do i call her this thursday like i was thinking of doing? or just never call her again and delete her number? she's nice and a pretty fun person but i seem to be messing with her, calling her every few months and all.

12-29-2003, 08:59 PM	#8
BlueStar Newly independent Location: Some state's capitol building Posts: 7,242	Delete her number and never ever talk to her ever again. (Alternatively, the nicer thing to do would be to tell her via some means (calling, text message, whatever) that you got back together with an ex-girlfriend or something...this way she has been given a reason as to why you are no longer contacting her.) Don't screw around with her like that...if you don't actually want a relationship with her (which I'm betting is what she wants...from what little she said, she doesn't seem like the no-strings/no emotions hook-up kind of girl, which means that she is putting up your behavior and still talking to you because she really likes you, which probably means that she has been hurt on some level each time you've suddenly stopped contact with her), just let it go. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 5 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

12-29-2003, 09:25 PM	#11
scouse_dave Minion of Satan Location: Manchester Posts: 5,089	well...however you've treated this girl up until this point...the girl obviously doesn't mind/thinks it's an acceptable way to be treated. maybe she doesn't read anything into it when you phone her and ask her out. so....in that case, maybe you should keep on keeping on. having said that, i had a similar situation with a girl once...and it just made me feel bad in the end. i tried to wash my hands of her altogether in the end. Last edited by scouse_dave : 12-29-2003 at 09:47 PM.

12-30-2003, 03:37 AM	#21
Fattening Ass Just Hook it to My Veins! Location: Planet Nintendu 64 Posts: 30,825	what was said earlier seemed to be right on. If she doesn't already have a problem with these sporatic calls and visits, then it seems fair game, as it seems she's fine with it being like that. __________________ To view links or images in signatures your post count must be 5 or greater. You currently have 0 posts.

12-29-2003, 08:43 PM	#2
Fall Down Blue Banned Location: i think rumsfeld should be king because hes a real patriot. just the other day i saw him testifying on the 9/11 commission and some guy asked him about y he didnt stop the plane attacks and he was like "i dnot know, f you fags" lol. Posts: 4,821	dude youre just playing your cards, youre not an asshole. i say you nail that shit and never look back. holla at your boy

12-29-2003, 08:45 PM	#3
dusty Minion of Satan Location: holding on. Posts: 5,932	will you stop with the virgins already!!! shame on you

12-29-2003, 08:50 PM	#4
Debaser ghost Location: @SactoMacto Posts: 12,201	you're only an asshole if this girl actually wants a relationship with you. if she is on the same page with you in terms of just wanting to mess around and nothing serious, then its all good, playa.

12-29-2003, 09:21 PM	#9
mirrar Braindead Location: in our bedroom, after the war. Posts: 19,826	you're not an asshole. i don't understand why everone thinks there should be this written in stone protocal about relationships or whatever. so what if you call her every couple months and kissed her? if she starts calling you all the time and making hardcore advances on you and you keep doing this, then yeah it's a shitty thing to do. other then that don't worry about it!

12-29-2003, 09:24 PM	#10
Axis of Action Socialphobic Location: ur underpants lol Posts: 13,209	People need to be more vocal. Stop this beating-around-the-bush shit. If she hasn't said "WTF, I wanna date you, stop dating me once every 4 months," then don't worry about it.

12-29-2003, 09:31 PM	#14
Quagmire Posts: n/a	wow... thanks netphoria. i appreciate the insightful responses. i'll probably call her. what the hell.... it's not like i have anything better early next week and she was always at least nice.

12-29-2003, 10:57 PM	#18
sawdust restaurants Fucking Creep Location: On the East Coast Posts: 5,992	stop manipulating her, man.