The suicide hotline just hung up on me.

[Sarcastic Smile]

Originally Posted by bahnzah

so are you like chronically depressed or do you have like, legitimate reasons.

I have reasons. I was like this when I was younger and haven't been this low in years... tried to do everything I could to improve my life to make up for the things I couldn't control... work 2 jobs, go to school, try to fight my anxiety by having a semi-normal social life.. by all accounts I'm normal to most people I guess.

And yes I have reasons but I don't want to put them on others, I've never been one to talk about those thing, I hate when people get all "oh poor you". Really bad childhood basically and I the world in general depressed me.

[Mayfuck]

lol@'legitimate reasons' Feelings happen and they are contextual and not subject to some objective, universal guidelines.

[bahnzah]

that was sort of a half joke. depression suxx.

[Debaser]

Adventures in Depression

[MyOneAndOnly]

Originally Posted by Sarcastic Smile

I have reasons. I was like this when I was younger and haven't been this low in years... tried to do everything I could to improve my life to make up for the things I couldn't control... work 2 jobs, go to school, try to fight my anxiety by having a semi-normal social life.. by all accounts I'm normal to most people I guess.

And yes I have reasons but I don't want to put them on others, I've never been one to talk about those thing, I hate when people get all "oh poor you". Really bad childhood basically and I the world in general depressed me.

do you have a head shrinker to talk to? I'm assuming you've tried that before? do you have someone that you talk to on a regular basis?

and as far as bad childhoods go, you ain't the only one. there's a huge portion of the population who feels exactly the same way. In that way you are not alone, even if you feel like you are.

I'm sure you've heard this before... blah blah blah... But I think if you called the help line you are obviously looking for someone to talk to.

[smashingjj]

I've started a reverse suicide hotline because of this thread. I'm calling random and not so random people to tell them to kill themselves.

[yo soy el mejor]

Originally Posted by Sarcastic Smile

I have reasons. I was like this when I was younger and haven't been this low in years... tried to do everything I could to improve my life to make up for the things I couldn't control... work 2 jobs, go to school, try to fight my anxiety by having a semi-normal social life.. by all accounts I'm normal to most people I guess.

And yes I have reasons but I don't want to put them on others, I've never been one to talk about those thing, I hate when people get all "oh poor you". Really bad childhood basically and I the world in general depressed me.

i feel ya.

[agenda suicide]

Originally Posted by Sarcastic Smile

And yes I have reasons but I don't want to put them on others, I've never been one to talk about those thing, I hate when people get all "oh poor you". Really bad childhood basically and I the world in general depressed me.

Opening up and talking to someone about how you're feeling doesn't have to mean putting your problems on others. I feel the same way, but actually talking to someone and getting shit off your chest does you a world of good.

[ilikeplanets]

People suck at listening

[yo soy el mejor]

you say that because you probably do.

[reprise85]

Originally Posted by agenda suicide

Opening up and talking to someone about how you're feeling doesn't have to mean putting your problems on others. I feel the same way, but actually talking to someone and getting shit off your chest does you a world of good.

Agree 100%

People in general are bad listeners (not all) but if you go to a therapist they are paid to listen and then to help you help yourself basically. Or they should be these things.

I also assumed you were not seriously calling a suicide line for help so I apologize. It was an accident I'm sure so call back if you need to or try a different one.

hope you feel better and get some help

[agenda suicide]

****** really is a vapid, insufferable child that rarely brings anything of value to the conversation.

[reprise85]

Originally Posted by yo soy el mejor

you say that because you probably do.

not everything is projection

but i bet ilp does suck at listening anyway amirite planets?

[Trotskilicious]

Originally Posted by Sarcastic Smile

Please don't.. if thats how you feel about me and those are the opinions you have formed, be a prick. I like keeping it real.

yeah but i thought you were self involved and smug and honestly if you're depressed then you can't be really either of those because you're really critical of yourself

i'm just saying i can empathize with that

i am being real

[Trotskilicious]

and i only want to make fun of people who are full of themselves

nimrod
sppunk
banana
etc

[Eulogy]

i never got the impression SS was full of herself

not raggin' on you, just sayin'

[supermaid]

even the lean brisket was dried out, such a bummer

[Trotskilicious]

Originally Posted by Eulogy

i never got the impression SS was full of herself

not raggin' on you, just sayin'

i apparently misinterpreted a lot of things about her

[supermaid]

"Hello, you've reached Suicide Hotline..."

"such a bummer..."

[rottenugly]

Maybe they're racist.

[duovamp]

Originally Posted by Sarcastic Smile

I called for I don't know what, curiosity perhaps on what this a telephone line could possibly offer. There was some automated lady, said press one if blah blah something, stay on the line otherwise. I stayed on the line, hold music... then boom-disconnected. HA! I figured this was humor netphoria could appreciate.

I feel like this thread title was extremely misleading.

[ilikeplanets]

Originally Posted by reprise85

not everything is projection

but i bet ilp does suck at listening anyway amirite planets?

Not to you

[yo soy el mejor]

Originally Posted by agenda suicide

****** really is a vapid, insufferable child that rarely brings anything of value to the conversation.

you make me want to be a better person.

[yo soy el mejor]

you're so cool.

[Gossamer]

do you have a plan?
have you tried to hurt yourself in the past?
any substance use?
who's your main social support?

on the bright side of all this, if you really wanted to kill yourself you wouldn't have called a suicide hotline...

that's a strength in itself.

I'm going to tell a little story now that I find pretty interesting...

One of my best friends was recently dx with depression, did some time in an inpatient ward and had a lot of suicidal ideation/psychotic thoughts that went with the depression. He was one of the most popular kids in high school and generally very well liked by everyone. Good looking, supportive fam, smart, funny....but when he didn't get into grad school his depression really got out of control and he had to go on antidepressants. About 6 months ago, me and all my best friends decided to go camping for a weekend. We stayed up really late on the last night drinking around the fire and basically catching up and discussing a wide range of topics. After lots of booze he started talking about what it was like to be an inpatient. Then he told us about how he still feels like he wants to kill himself and how the antidepressants are the only thing keeping him from doing so because when he is on them he doesn't really feel any emotion. He talked about how he had his death all planned out and even went about setting it up one night when everyone was asleep. Now this was some pretty fucked up dark shit for most of my other friends but to be honest I found the whole experience very enlightening. Don't get me wrong, I love my friend. But I also grew up with him and feel like I know him better than most people so when he says dark shit like this I kind of really wanted to pick his brain. I asked him a lot of questions about a lot of things and then I decided to ask him, point blank... "If Jason Vorhees were to come into our campsite RIGHT NOW with his giant machete would you sit there and let him kill you or would you get up and run?" He stared at me for what seemed like an eternity and then he told me that he would run.

Now, why is it that someone who "wants to die" would get up and run if somebody wanted to kill him. I think it all comes back to the fact that he wants to punish himself. He doesn't actually want to die.

[Eulogy]

someone who wants to kill himself might still not want to be violently hacked to death by a crazy person in a goalie mask

[Trotskilicious]

it's nice to know goss is somewhat alright as a human being and let me tell you why:

one of the reasons i confess my depression on netphoria is because when you confess it to people in real life in my experience there is an 80% chance that they are not going to understand at all, be uncomfortable, and be alienated by it. most of the time people judge you for it.

and take my word for it it's not like i'm telling everyone i know, it's people i thought i could trust with this stuff but unfortunately the majority of people are emotionally shallow and can't handle real life shit nawmsayin

[Eulogy]

i wouldn't call him a bad person, he's just an insufferable boarder

there are worse things to be, for sure.

[Gossamer]

Originally Posted by Eulogy

someone who wants to kill himself might still not want to be violently hacked to death by a crazy person in a goalie mask

c'mon don't reduce it to that, it's more than that and you know it.

also Jason usually was pretty good with the quick deaths.

[Gossamer]

btw, Ted Bundy worked beside Ann Rule at a suicide hotline for several months...

pretty interesting