fuck you im drunk

[Hate the Hater]

Hi Starla. It's -1 degree outside right now. A high of 4 degrees tomorrow.

[Starla]

lol

[Shallowed]

Originally Posted by carapatricia

was a server at high end restaurant in river north.

You should go there for dinner and be a total slutbag of a customer.

[Starla]

last week it was pretty damn cold here. I was wearing layers upon layers of clothes. I felt like a bear once I put my big parka and boots on.

[Hate the Hater]

Severe Weather Alert

BITTERLY COLD TEMPERATURES OVERNIGHT WILL COMBINE WITH WINDS
INCREASING TO 25 TO 35 MPH....TO PRODUCE BITTERLY COLD WIND
CHILLS VALUES BETWEEN 20 BELOW AND 30 BELOW ZERO. THESE CONDITIONS
WILL CONTINUE THROUGH SUNDAY.

[Trotskilicious]

Originally Posted by Hate the Hater

Severe Weather Alert

BITTERLY COLD TEMPERATURES OVERNIGHT WILL COMBINE WITH WINDS
INCREASING TO 25 TO 35 MPH....TO PRODUCE BITTERLY COLD WIND
CHILLS VALUES BETWEEN 20 BELOW AND 30 BELOW ZERO. THESE CONDITIONS
WILL CONTINUE THROUGH SUNDAY.

Yeah wow I hate living in texas I wish we got snow.

Though I'm sure that front is coming for us.

[bardy]

Originally Posted by Starla

that's what I used to tell myself

what is THAT supposed to mean

[Starla]

poor baby lol

[Starla]

Originally Posted by bardy

what is THAT supposed to mean

it means, have another beer

[bardy]

im having some coca cola

[yo soy el mejor]

i havent been drunk in well over a month. and i just bought my first pack of cigarettes today in about the same amount of time. i go to bed around 9:00 o'clock every night and i dont even have to wake up that early. whoa to me.

[Dogfighter28]

you soy el sauced

[yo soy el mejor]

that's like opposite of what i just said!

im drinking hot chocolate right now. and earlier i ate a chocolate pop tart *vomit*

[carapatricia]

Originally Posted by Pasta of Muppet

You should go there for dinner and be a total slutbag of a customer.

good idea.

can't afford to eat there now that i'm not working there! that place was money.

they fired two more people today in the lounge for having 'bad attitudes", one girl had worked there for 2 1/2 years.

its like, i understand letting people go because its slow, but it should go by merit, not some bullshit excuse. and not management causing drama and instead being like "we invested a lot of money into your training and continued education. come back when the season picks back up"

you know?

[Shallowed]

Go together and be a group of unpleasable customers.

[Trotskilicious]

I got fired from Smith & Hawken earlier this year after busting my ass doing the whole opening ordeal, you know trucks and trucks full of boxes and shit. Then on the third day of training they said I wasn't "taking it seriously enough" even though I had all this free shit they gave me for getting a bunch of questions right. I have orchids, 80 dollars in gift cards (which I used on throw pillows for the couch), watering pots, a teak occasional table that's actually totally fucking awesome. Really pissed me right off.

Of course, I didn't fit in there at all. Nearly all the guys were gay save for two. And I had confirmation that all the opening leads, the managers from other stores, were gay. Which is interesting because I pretty much knew it from the start with most of them. People weren't hip to my sarcastic sense of dark humor, either.

Of course I landed at an easy non-customer service job that pays me a lot more because I have a college education but still, it was pretty obnoxious to have someone fire you after you drove across town at 830 in the morning on a Monday to tell them that you aren't firing them but "we're offering you an opportunity to part ways with Smith & Hawken."

[Hate the Hater]

CAT FIGHT!!!

[carapatricia]

Originally Posted by Hate the Hater

Severe Weather Alert

BITTERLY COLD TEMPERATURES OVERNIGHT WILL COMBINE WITH WINDS
INCREASING TO 25 TO 35 MPH....TO PRODUCE BITTERLY COLD WIND
CHILLS VALUES BETWEEN 20 BELOW AND 30 BELOW ZERO. THESE CONDITIONS
WILL CONTINUE THROUGH SUNDAY.

Fuck You, Midwest

Let me preface this post by saying that the people in the Midwest are kind, open-hearted, and lovely to be around. Traveling with Stella, I have met nothing but the best people here in the Midwest. That being said, I have been for four days, a total of ninety-six hours, and I have been freezing cold each of those hours. Since arriving in Minneapolis on Wednesday, my entire body has basically been numb from cold. It’s been awful. Today we drove in snow from Chicago to Ann Arbor, MI. Each time we stopped, the first word out of my mouth was, “Fuck!” because when the temperature is negative fifty thousand, that’s pretty much all you can say.

It’s really cold here. Uncomfortably cold. And windy. And slushy. And awful. Why do these people choose to live here? For the natural splendor? There is no natural splendor. There is only the cold.

Even as I write this, from under the covers of my bed in my five star room at the Holiday Inn, I am cold. My legs, which are specifically covered in hair to protect me from this exact situation, are cold. My feet, despite being swaddled in the finest socks available at The Gap, are cold and still feel wet even though I know they are not. They only feel that way to me because for ninety of the last ninety-six hours they have been wet, and I think they now cannot remember a time when they were not wet. It’s like when you lose a limb and still feel it. That’s called a phantom limb. I have phantom cold.

The people here take pride, of course, in the cold. They stand around outside in shirt sleeves and pretend they are not dying from hypothermia. Because to admit they are cold would be to admit that they have chosen to live in the worst fucking place on earth. It’s not like living in the Alps or something where you can make a legitimate case that it’s beautiful and there’s lots to do like bobsledding. Because it’s not beautiful and there’s no bobsledding. There’s nothing to do here at all. Which is probably why so many people have been coming to see us. I suspect a lot of those people aren’t even interested in seeing comedy, they just want to be somewhere where they know they are going to be a lot of other bodies gathered. Maybe they think if enough people huddle together and laugh, it will warm them up. Not that anybody admits they’re cold.

So fuck you, Midwest. Your people are terrific but your climate can burn in hell. Although the fires of hell would be a distinct improvement because at least they would be warm.

by michael ian black

[bardy]

woah my post got deleted but now I see why

[carapatricia]

chicago.

-4
windchill -30

[bardy]

sacramento

45
feels like: 43

[ohnoitsbonnie]

I really have no idea what the temperature is where I am

[yo soy el mejor]

National and Local Weather Forecast, Hurricane, Radar and Report

[yo soy el mejor]

thats weatherDOTcom

[ohnoitsbonnie]

I could have also just as easy if not easier simply stepped outside

[yo soy el mejor]

you wouldnt be able to gauge the exact temperature from doing that

[ohnoitsbonnie]

Not to mention that the source is severely incorrect

[yo soy el mejor]

severely, huh?

well, i guess you'll have to think of something else if you want to know the REAL temperature.
i tried to help.


now i cant decide whether to watch american psycho (it just finished downloading or clean while jamming out). l8s, y'all!

[ohnoitsbonnie]

I don't give a FUCK