taking out a street light

[trev]

anyone done this? there's one outside my bedroom window and i really want it gone.

what's the best way to ensure i don't get caught or seen by neighbours, and that it doesn't get fixed quickly?

[fluxequalsrad]

well its always loud, that's some heavy glass covering the light. Your best bet is to just got out with a brick at an unreasonable hour and pound it + run.

[trev]

so the plan is:

walk outside front door - throw brick at street light - run back in the house

maybe i should try and pay some dodgy kid 20 bucks to do it.

[fluxequalsrad]

for improved accuracy: throw it underhand with two hands,.... uhh....think lumberjack throwing those giant fucking logs.


and post pics.

[Luke de Spa]

Originally Posted by trev

anyone done this? there's one outside my bedroom window and i really want it gone.

what's the best way to ensure i don't get caught or seen by neighbours, and that it doesn't get fixed quickly?

you selfish shit. your neighbourhood depends on that lighting for its safety. get some curtain liners or blind yourself

[trev]

Originally Posted by Luke de Spa

you selfish shit. your neighbourhood depends on that lighting for its safety. get some curtain liners or blind yourself

yes dad



so you think it will take 2 shots then, one to take out the cover, and one for the globe? if so i might have to try different nights i think. i know it's stupid and near impossible but a gun with a silencer would be so much easier - if i learned how to shoot properly, or find someone to shoot well for me.

[Travis Meeks]

what did your father just tell you?

[Ol' Couch Ass]

Originally Posted by trev

yes dad



so you think it will take 2 shots then, one to take out the cover, and one for the globe? if so i might have to try different nights i think. i know it's stupid and near impossible but a gun with a silencer would be so much easier - if i learned how to shoot properly, or find someone to shoot well for me.

yep...discharging a firearm at a glass and metal structure in the middle of the night in a sleepy neighborhood, what could possibly go wrong?

[Tonrey]

you make it sound dangerous OCA

[MrPantyFAce]

i really dont think youd be able to take it out with a brick, certainly not ot two shots. youd be out there for hours.

a tragedy occured online before when a yound man posted about going to hack into a streetlight to cut the wires so he could see an elipse or ccomet or something. he never posted again because he died from electrucisuian. learn from his mistakes, dont let it happen again

http://pms.colonpee.com/irc/skot.txt

[MrPantyFAce]

a gun is the only way to go

[MonteLDS]

wow em bed got canned on netphoria

[MrPantyFAce]

its probably for the best, if we were allowed to post videos thats all they would do and there wouldnt be discussions anymore

[TheMilstead]

Originally Posted by MonteLDS

wow em bed got canned on netphoria

Embed? Yeah. Embed.

Hey, guys. SUP.

[trev]

Originally Posted by MrPantyFAce

i really dont think youd be able to take it out with a brick, certainly not ot two shots. youd be out there for hours.

well yeah 2 good shots i meant, obviously i'm no expert at brick throwing so i'll miss a few times for sure.

any other ways? like putting in a complaint that you got a shock from the light pole or something, actually they'd probably just service it and not turn it off.

[cork_soaker]

take a dark blanket and put it over yer damn windows

[Travis Meeks]

http://www.kmart.com/shc/s/p_10151_1...0070926x00003a

[fluxequalsrad]

dude I took one out, one brick - one shot. You just gotta heave it.

[Travis Meeks]

so the town is just never going to replace the light bulb then

[fluxequalsrad]

Originally Posted by Travis Meeks

so the town is just never going to replace the light bulb then

I suppose you could prolong the time it takes to get replaced by gathering up the broken glass that would inevitably accumulate under light after it is shattered...

[cork_soaker]

until, you know, nighttime happens

[Mablak]

Originally Posted by trev

anyone done this? there's one outside my bedroom window and i really want it gone.

what's the best way to ensure i don't get caught or seen by neighbours, and that it doesn't get fixed quickly?

The only surefire way to get rid of it without anyone suspecting you is take it out with a sniper rifle. Find the tallest structure nearby from which you can still see the streetlight, and get to the top. If it's someone's house then you're going to have to do it when no one's home and when no one could be watching, to do this right will take a solid month of planning and careful observation of the schedule of every resident who lives within a half-mile radius of the area. If it's a tree, hillside, etc. then you're in luck and you only require about a week of planning. In either case, carry your weapon in an instrument case, and I cannot stress this enough, do not use a guitar case.

Due to countless movie cliches, the guitar case has become a prime suspect for containing firearms, so please use any other instrument case you can find. Next, before going through with the hit it's pretty much mandatory that you either chew or burn off your finger skin so you can't possibly be identified. You can do this in the shower so the blood can be washed away, but do not wash the skin down the drain. Digestion is the only way to completely eradicate all traces of the skin, so don't take any chances, eat it or feed the skin pieces to a loved one or pet.

This might go without saying, but you need to wax your entire body, eyebrows included, so that you don't leave behind any pesky hair traces. If there's even a chance that you're going to leave behind any semen or urine, and trust me there is, simply use super glue to seal your urethra shut. As for your disguise, it's best to appear unassuming so be sure to wear glasses and a fake imperial mustache. Footprints are a dead giveaway, so wear high heels three sizes smaller than your shoe size that you construct from scratch yourself. Because if you buy high heels anywhere, the police will find you in a heartbeat which might even lead them to me, so I hope you're smarter than that.

You need to create a diversion so no one notices the streetlight getting shot out, so you're going to have to activate an hour long fireworks display a few minutes prior to the hit, at precisely 10:30 pm. Of course you'll have to hire some pyrotechnicians to do this for you, but these things cost money. Walk to the designated area in business attire, and with the fireworks distracting everyone in your neighborhood, take aim and fire one shot at the light. If you miss, repeat this process in exactly one month, but do not take another shot, as this could easily be seen and interpreted as gunfire by an observant neighbor.

Once finished, the only way to destroy all traces of your weapon is by means of digestion. Using a blowtorch or some other means, liquify the sniper rifle and separate it into exactly 300 small pieces. Over the course of one month, consume 10 of these small pieces daily. If you find yourself unable to digest these pieces, you must find an animal that can, presumably a whale or elephant.

If you stray from these instructions in the slightest way, you'll probably die in a shootout with the police, good luck.

[Banana]

My apartment last semester had a light on the wall that was 90 degrees from window. That sucked, but you got used to it over time.

[Mablak]

Also, kill anyone that tries to repair the streetlight

[deadaswarhol]

bangin on a trashcan
drummin on a streetlight

[fluxequalsrad]

Ikea has those light-killing blinds....

[tear stained glass]

1) this is a stupid idea, so don't do it--just get blackout blinds like everyone was saying. who knows, perhaps you have a relative who lived on the coast during WWII who still has their blackout window coverings.

2) i'm not a firearms expert, but i would think a bb gun would be safer, quieter, and nearly as effective as an actual gun, and wouldn't require you to get any kind of permit for legal possession.

3) don't damage public property, asshole.

[commando]

b.b. gun wouldn't even reach the light, let alone so much as dent the cover. you're going to need a .22 at the very least.

[Hate the Hater]

I shot a sparrow with a bb gun and all it did was knock off some feathers and the bird flew away.

[redbreegull]

Originally Posted by Travis Meeks

so the town is just never going to replace the light bulb then

Probably not. I dunno where you live, but I have seen streetlights on suburban roads stay out for months to years man. No one gives a shit. Unless there is a specific complaint I seriously doubt there will be a mad scramble to replace it. It won't get replaced until whatever department that is in charge of streetlights does an inspection or something, which I assume happens very seldom.