Spinoff: I've found out why jealousy exists!

Sapphire · 01-06-2005, 04:53 AM

It's to make us covet people or objects that we would normally find undesirable or substandard.

Your friend is going out with a blob that has a vagina. You could care less! Right?

Wrong! You see them doing coupley shit at the table. Kissing. Smooching. Sharing "feelings." And it dawns upon you, "My friend has it better off than me!" Suddenly, you are blinded to the blob's poor communication skills or soap-defying odor. Suddenly! It is you who would do anything to pound the pork into her so hard that she'd be coughing bacon! You would trade anything in the world to be in your friend's shitty spot! Simply for the reason that he is there and you are not!

Maybe that's the secret. I go out and date a girl that is death-defyingly ugly. Some girl that's slightly more attractive than her sees that and flies into a jealous tiff! Now I'm going out with her! But, someone even better comes along and thinks, "I could steal him!" And the trend continues till I'm the dude banging Heidi Klumm!

Toby · 01-06-2005, 04:55 AM

Im such a jealous guy, it sux.

Ihaman · 01-06-2005, 04:56 AM

My god you're right!

Sapphire · 01-06-2005, 04:57 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ihaman
My god you're right!

Stop chasing after sub-standard goods Ihaman.

Go out with me instead.

Voice Implodes · 01-06-2005, 05:54 AM

that is one hell of a revelation.

preach to us from the mountain, sapphire!

01-06-2005, 04:53 AM	#1
Sapphire Apocalyptic Poster Location: Wo ist JONES!?! Posts: 4,654	Spinoff: I've found out why jealousy exists! It's to make us covet people or objects that we would normally find undesirable or substandard. Your friend is going out with a blob that has a vagina. You could care less! Right? Wrong! You see them doing coupley shit at the table. Kissing. Smooching. Sharing "feelings." And it dawns upon you, "My friend has it better off than me!" Suddenly, you are blinded to the blob's poor communication skills or soap-defying odor. Suddenly! It is you who would do anything to pound the pork into her so hard that she'd be coughing bacon! You would trade anything in the world to be in your friend's shitty spot! Simply for the reason that he is there and you are not! Maybe that's the secret. I go out and date a girl that is death-defyingly ugly. Some girl that's slightly more attractive than her sees that and flies into a jealous tiff! Now I'm going out with her! But, someone even better comes along and thinks, "I could steal him!" And the trend continues till I'm the dude banging Heidi Klumm!

01-06-2005, 04:56 AM	#3
Ihaman Sometimes, though. Location: Hazard, California Posts: 21,274	My god you're right!

01-06-2005, 05:54 AM	#5
Voice Implodes Minion of Satan Location: upstairs Posts: 6,823	that is one hell of a revelation. preach to us from the mountain, sapphire!