4000 post party!

[StillBecomingApart]

*goes to the bedroom with a girl*

[twilightfadez]

so i guess this means we're not invited?

[StillBecomingApart]

Originally posted by twilightfadez
so i guess this means we're not invited?

You are guessing wrong. You are invited!

[twilightfadez]

woo hoo!
group sex!

[professional wannabe]

Originally posted by twilightfadez
woo hoo!
group sex!

hey, invite me in while you're at it....

[StillBecomingApart]

Originally posted by twilightfadez
woo hoo!
group sex!

That's a party!

[sickbadthing]

Seriously. Getting pussy used to be as simple as asking a fat chich where she was sleeping tonight, now i gotta have a fucking "air-tight game plan" or the planets have to align or something. This sucks so bad. I'm as pissed off as a Hillbilly with no arms staring at a jar of pickled eggs about this shit. I haven't scored in well over year. I wish I could just blame it on 9-11 like george bush would want me to, but the truth is, the only similarities between the these two subjects is the phallic image that is the WTC crashing down only reminds me of my dick going limp except for the 70,000 times a week i pull it out to whack it. Scream all you want dick, ain't no one gonna hear you.

Why the fuck can't i score anymore? Is it some sort of conspiracy? Everything's still in place. I still meet new girls, get phone numbers, but I keep getting thrown out at first.. I mean, I know i'm not Don Juan or even Rasputin but if i buy a chick a $2.50 drink, I EXPECT $2.50 WORTH OF PUSSY YOU DIZZY BITCH. God, now I know what nickleback's crying about when he's singing about beating women. It's like they're trying to torture me.

I know what you fags are thinking as you sit behind your keyboard, rapidly forming your witty replies, sipping on your rootbeer with your taco bell close at hand. You're thinking, HEHEH *SNORT* HEHEHE what a loser HEHEHE. Well, the only response I have to that is that I can hit your mother in the head with an axe from 40 yards, you virgin pile of shit.

Speaking of, slowly but surely i'm once again joining your ranks. It's been so long that I reckon my virginity is "growing back." Here's a script for my next sexual encounter if there ever is one.

Girl:
Me: One... Two... It was good for me, how bout you?
Girl:

Let me just sum up how much of a comedy option me getting sex is right now. Most people have a comedy option as an ace in the hole. A fat chick, a desperate ex-girlfriend, something. Well, I threw that option out the door because i'm an asshole. After about 5 months of not scoring, I went back to my old friend, the internet. All that did was confuse the issue. My ace in the hole now is a michigan hermaphrodite. Hey, if its got a cave you can go spelunking, i guess.

What the fuck is wrong here? I'm not doing any thing different than I used to. I'm average looking, I'm a nice guy, I'm fairly entertaining and I have money to spend on bitches, so just what in the fuck has changed over the course of 2 years that now even the fattest most disgusting ogre of a butter troll fatass diesel bitch would turn me down?

I tried blaming the internet. I took a month off from that, no dice. I tried blaming my clothes, so I bought a whole bunch of new clothes and that didn't work. New cologne, new methods, new hair styles, new friends...everything. Nothing... Like the hillbilly with no arms said while he was staring at the jar of pickled eggs, "This sucks."

Ohh well, I guess there's always rape.

[Shane the Pane]

4000 posts.. 2 words... big deal.