I've just felt a lot of pent up anxiety and frustration over the past few days. Too afraid to let myself be vulnerable with friends and divulge any of my insecurities for fear of judgement, and I've found that just venting on the internet like on here or on Reddit doesn't actually really do much to help, either. It's just that bottled, futile, impotent venom that I have swirling inside of me, that I can't do anything about. Hobbies don't help, because I can't focus on that shit when I'm upset. If I try, I just start to transfer my emotions to whatever activity in engaged in, and become frustrated and resentful with what I'm trying to do.
Despite all my rage I am still just a rat in a cage.