Originally Posted by pavementtune
2014 seems to be the year I'm getting an idea how it is when people start passing away left and right. I don't want to imagine how it is when you're 70, and most people you knew have died. Maybe it's getting easier, less surprising, less shocking.
Death number 7 this year. Offed himself, only 36, one of the extremely "lucky" people, then depression hit him.
And I know it's wrong, but I can't help it. I have to blame someone. His family says they've always been with him since he was struggling with depression, especially "towards the end." Then why the fucking fuck did nobody force him into hospital. And I know I'm a piece of shit for thinking that. But how do you do it without blaming anyone?
I should consider becoming a theist, at least you got to blame god for shit like this.
im sorry pave.
i asked my therapist today how her view towards death with regards to how she reacts to it has changed. she said gardening helps her re: death and reformation into something new etc. no consolation but i think death will get easier, just hopefully not because every we know has died.
in related news, i found out my therapist is also atheist/agnostic which i suspected but didnt know for sure.