I did know she had been depressed, but not because she told me. My mom told me that when we moved to Florida (I was <1 year old) and they brought my grandmother down here a few months later, her apartment was a nightmare to clean and she was doing stuff like giving hundreds of dollars away to people she didn't even know because she felt bad for them and they were taking advantage of her. And she was definitely not wealthy.
I used to be sort of close to my mom, or at least I thought I was. We do not really talk now, we see each other like 2-4 times a year and we live 20 minutes apart. She does not want to be more involved. She is the same with my sister. Of course, I blame myself. There was a thing that happened with the police a few years ago and I feel that that scared her into not being involved emotionally with me. This is something I talk about a lot in therapy. Plus all the stuff that happened to me as a kid, I don't know if she thinks she failed and can't be a good mother or what, but I'd be willing to put it behind me w/r/t our current relationship if she would be. But I don't think it will ever happen. Mom doesn't want to be my mom, boohoo etc