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Old 05-10-2014, 11:59 PM   #7
The exploding boy
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Location: "I'm a quivering collection of the worst and least helpful emotions: fear, anxiety, terror, paranoia, indigestion, dishpan hands..."
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Codeine does jack shit for me. I mean i had it prescribed by dentists a handful of times. One pill does nothing. Two puts me to sleep. Never had a high.

Earlier this week i did Dronabinol for a medical trial (yes, you two or three people, i still do those occasionally, i mentioned it already). Just for the generic version. 5mg, normal daily dosage. This is an extract of THC (you know the main molecule in marijuana). Now i've never smoked a joint in my life, and now i dont think i want to.

Pretty much worst trial ever. Full blown panic attack, uncontrollable shaking for three hours, flashback to Stephen King's Firestarter (you know the part if you read it) paranoid feeling that the nurse was lying to me about my vitals being fine (actually eventually they weren't my heart rate was at 110 for 3 hours) and that she knew some of us were about to die, felt like i couldn't breathe, had a feeling like i just wanted to run the fuck away or scream and punch someone, especially the people who couldn't stop laughing uncontrollably because of the drug. It took me two days to recover. The first night, pretty much didnt sleep, i just was in sweat and panicked. Some sort of PTSD.

First time in what? 15 years of doing those on and off? First time i ever decided not to do the rest of the trial (there was a second 36 hours stay, 5mg again). Called them, told them give me the 300$ and keep the remaining 465$. Not fucking worth it. Never had anything close to that happen.

And i thought i was maybe just gonna get a pleasant high. I don't think i know pleasant highs actually. Drugs that are suppose to do it either put me to sleep or make me panic.

What is Dronabinol for? To stimulate appetite in AIDS patients. Jesus christ. The idea of food never entered my mind and we'd been fasting for like 16 hours.

Last edited by The exploding boy : 05-11-2014 at 12:44 AM.

 
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