[teh b0lly!!1]

Midnight in Paris

some guy travels in paris with his distant fiance, and discovers he can travel back in time to the 1920's.

watched it following a rec from a friend with a boneheaded kind of taste.
this is probably the first woody allen movie i actually hated.

the list of annoyances, in no particular order:

* owen wilson (the lead) is a shit actor. first of all, his nose looks like a crooked dick. second, i suspect Woody only picked him because they possess the same kinda jewish-american New Jersey nasal whine in their voices. third, he just kinda talks like a douche and constantly looks blown away by what's happening at all times. i guess that's sort of in line with the plot, but he has zero depth as a performer.

* there is literally the same ONE piece of music playing throughout the entire movie. whenever there's a slight interlude from mostly terrible dialogue, this initially endearing, then incredibly grating acoustic musical piece just fades in and out to accompany any scene not involving talking.

* the story is fucking dumb as shit. obviously it's fantasy, but the way it was treated cinematically just didn't make it feel that way. it just feels concocted, groundless, and unhinged. person goes to a bar in Paris and whop - Hemmingway, T.S Elliott, Salvador Dali and Scott and Zelda Fitzgerald are all there! gosh darnit. who'd imagine?!

* oh yeah, and all those characters eat sack too. horrific acting. seriously, terrible acting all around in this movie. adrian brody as salvador dali was especially lol. there were a few minor exceptions though, mostly small supporting roles.

* the whole thing wraps up in the most pathetic way. it starts off, introduces the fantasy 20's thing in a very crude, stitched up way, never picks up at all, and ends like a weak, bitter fart.

upsides:

* like all of allen's movies i'd watched so far, it nicely represents upper middle class life in beautiful european cities.

* pretty good cinematography.

* sharp digs at smug know-it-all academic farts, and grossly materialistic women in relationships, in what is probably the only worthwhile part of the movie (the introduction, with Michael Sheen and Rachel McAdams playing nice supporting roles).

for further updates and DIDJA KNO, please subscribe to my mailing list.
in it, i'm going to be sharing with you...
- my powerful secrets for movie watching.
- the 5 things you MUST know in order to make a zillion dollars in just 1 day with no work (lol it's so easy, you'll be SHOCKED)
- the secret formula to achieving true love and happiness in life

regards,
bolly.

PS -
this is not a weird fetish thing, i promise.