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Old 11-30-2017, 06:30 AM   #327
Disco King
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ram27 View Post
Not that I know anything, but I'd say to try to keep up a casual friendship, keep her company through the depression, if you can
I did think about messaging her to suggest hanging out just as friends if something more casual might reduce the pressure on her, but then I thought that might actually make her feel worse. Like, she might interpret it as her issues being "baggage" that somebody wouldn't want to deal with in a dating situation.

I also don't really know what it would mean to hang out just as "friends" when both parties are keen on each other, and know that the other is keen on them. It seems the only thing that would distinguish such hang-out sessions from a date would be a semantic label.

Quote:
Originally Posted by teh b0lly!!1 View Post
you need to take the pressure off her.
she is probably feeling awkward about putting things out in the open like that, and kinda feels like you're catering to her now instead of courting her. just find a way to talk to her naturally without making it seem like there's an "agenda", you're just talking to her/asking to see her cause you like her. don't be overly cautious, it'll just trigger her.

try to figure out a way to suggest meeting casually, without the normally associated pressures of a date. tell her you're going to be somewhere fun at a specific time, where she can choose to come see you for a bit or not - like for example, when you're already hanging with other friends but are around her neighborhood or something. or ask her if she wants to come along as you take some photos, and you'll buy her a cup of coffee. and so forth
That might not be bad. Just, like, being normal and not putting too much attention on what she aired, because from my own experience, it does just make one more uncomfortable when people start treating one as a fragile Fabergé egg after they find out about one's depression. Being all "what's up, how are you feeling?" probably just makes shit awkward. Yeah, maybe I'll just invite her to come along and do things I would be doing anyway, rather than planning a date together.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Elphenor View Post
Right, exactly

shoddy writing that takes me right out of the story

I much prefer when Batman is portrayed as a vigilante in a city where the institutions of justice have rotted to corruption
Yeah, one thing I really dug about Begins was how they emphasized that Gotham's crime problem stemmed from inequality and corruption, and that the street crime was just symptomatic of the wider societal issues. Batman is more nuanced that a guy who just wants to live out a revenge fantasy on muggers, he wants to target the big guys who are the root cause of everything, and "shake people out of apathy" to reclaim the city for the people.

I like stories with that angle, and when they show how Batman tries to help the city both with his resources as Bruce Wayne to end the poverty that produces crime, and as Batman to protect people from the crime that currently exists. Otherwise, he's just a crazy rich asshole who likes to beat up poor people to make himself feel better.

One kinda recent comic I really dug was Arkham Manor. Arkham Asylum is closed down, and nobody wants the new hospital built in their backyards, so Bruce Wayne gives up his mansion to become the new facility. He kind of reflects on how his father was a doctor and his mother a social worker, so he's carrying on their tradition of helping the ill. The comic deals with how he actually cares about the recovery of all the inmates at the asylum and has their interests at heart. It does a bit more to address the stigma of mental illness than most Batman comics, that usually make psychosis appear to be synonymous with evil. It still has a pretty cartoony and gothic depiction of mental illness, because it's a spooky thriller, but it still gives a perspective on Gotham's insane offenders not usually seen.

 
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