i'm turning 33 next month

Yeah, only young people go out on Friday nights.

I ate chinese food, watched basketball, m'bated, and then slept, and now I'm at work and I hate everything.

http://cdn.uproxx.com/wp-content/upl...anson-hate.gif

my crutch and i sober-drivered at an engagement party at which i which i only really knew the protagonists.

i had my first honest-to-god mystery geek conversation in years. although i'm okay at faking it i really hate small talk so this was just a totally unexpected treat.

topics covered:

early universe physics, superstring theory, gravity waves, space-time expansion
quantum computers
video games as a medium for storytelling
game of thrones
tolkien
neuroscience
privacy, google-NSA 'evil', corporate ethics
server cluster load-balancing, pervasive thin clients, cloud computing
virtual reality and the coming metaverse
posthumanism
bostrom's simulation argument
queens of the stone age, opeth

the only downside was that this guy was 22 and knew more than i did about basically everything we discussed, so i left feeling like a bit of an intellectual burnout, but i think i made up for my ignorance by making connections with otherwise-disparate conversation topics, which i don't think this guy would've managed by himself. being covert-geek and only partially introverted is sometimes useful

anyway, usually the most interesting party conversation i have with strangers is along human/political lines (requiring substantially more caution) so this was a pleasant surprise.

now i'm home with my kindle and a glass of a not very interesting hawkes bay bordeaux blend. thinking of drainpouring and opening a bottle of rioja instead. i have some dystopian sci-fi to wrap up

i realise that's kind of a hey look at me post, so sorry about that

i'm probably just overstimulated or something

That's not at all what I said or meant, hnibos.

Not as mature as someone who knocks over tiki torches at someone else's apartment though.

And 26 is still mid-20s anyway

there's no such thing as old

feeling okay about doing what you want (CETERIS PARIBUS) is healthy

Yeah I imagine this is true. I'm just still adjusting. After being in school for seven years and always having very little if anything to do on Fridays and having friends so accessible after being able to sleep in and dick around all day.. I dunno. This is just different.

It's also nice that I don't live alone so we can drink and watch TV and play video games and it feels like a party.

Basically I'm transitioning into an adult life still and it feels weird. That's all.

Now I'm awake at 6:30 on Saturdays ahhhhhhh fuck this shitttttt

Not really it's pretty ok.

i felt compelled to have something lined up on friday/saturday until i was about that age. i think that, at some point, working hard reorients the weekend towards being a resource for rest/reflection/relaxation than high-intensity socialising. if you're career-driven, anyway.

also at some point i realised that parties are not very well optimised towards the kind of social situations i prefer – thoughtful conversation, good humour, minimal interruptions. the appeal evaporated

that's not to say you can't have conversation-friendly parties, just that parties tend to feature attendees with disparate preferences, and louder people generally have an edge

I still feel that compulsion. But I recognize that it's sort of silly. I absolutely cherish the weekend as a time to not work. Anything else is a bonus.

But between that and the weather this winter, I've not seen a lot of people I would really like to see. And that gets frustrating.

This is the worst part. Even if I'm up until 2 I don't sleep a wink past 8:30.

Actually the worst part might be getting up early and having the urge to be productive. "I can get some stuff done because I have all this time before it's even lunch!"

Fucking god damn shit.

And by productive I mean play the video games and do the reading I didn't do enough of during the week.

I was just in the shower and halfway through I realized I didn't have to hurry.

It was pretty great. Might clean the apartment a little today. Yay weekends!!!

Still grappling with this tbh. I've followed a less than conventional path in life but I like where I'm at amd my (relatively loose) plans for the future. I still struggle with why I'm not like other people my age or my interests don't line up with most people I know. It's still sometimes hard to let myself be happy that I'm following my happiness, if that even makes sense.

I wonder if this ever goes away because I still get it at almost 32, that compulsion to get excited because the night is young and it's Friday!!! I mean my sitch is a bit different than yours obv but we still kind of get that youthful feeling on Friday nights like we should be doing something.
Truthfully even if we are out doing something, chances are in a few hours we'd want to be at home hanging out and being able to crawl into bed when we want. Or something.

I basically never go out and I'm probably a little too okay with that. No friends.

I have a mild cold. Nasal congestion/dripping, yellow mucus, mild stiff neck and headache. Mostly annoying. If it's going to get worse it's coming on super slowly.

Worked on my research paper about Wikipedia for a few hours last night. Probably about 3/4 done with it and I still have more than a month to finish.

I figured out why my kitty was having digestive problems, and her poop is now normal after some tweaking of her food. Yesterday I tried introducing some wet food so we'll see how that goes. Yes, I am happy that my cat's poop is normal.

I signed up for three classes in the summer. Full time. English 102, College Algebra and some computer literacy course. In fall I'm thinking of taking Spanish I, General Sociology, Total Wellness and Chemistry. Pretty excited. I made my whole educational plan and at the end I'll have 6 free credits to take whatever I want. Thinking of doing two out of Ethics, Adv General Psychology, Anthropology, Social Problems or Society and Disability.

My new position at work is great, I really needed a change.

If you're still reading this, tell me what's going on in your life :)

Same old stuff! Taking on some more responsibility in my work life. Which is good but also a little scary. Gotta do it eventually though, eh?

I remember when the thought of managing my money and paying bills etc seemed incomprehensible. Then I started doing it when I was 15, and after 20 y/o started slipping back and then couldn't imagine it again. It's nice to be functional. :)

I also have a review of my disability case coming up. As long as I'm in school full time, working, or a combination of the two, I can continue to receive benefits for a certain amount of time that varies based on where I am in the program. I basically at this point am looking at it like a scholarship, it's considered vocational rehabilitation. But they consider what you make per month, and I was thinking they calculated it a certain way and they do it a different way. So I might owe them some money for being about $20-$30 over my limit. I was freaking out a little, but I did things the right way and if it turns out I made too much money at a certain point, that's okay. It's only money and I'll work it out. I can always get real loans and I will have to at some point when I'm done with the program, which is I think 5 years max and I'm already through about 1 1/2 years.

The government works right sometimes. It is worth it monetarily to social security to help me get out of the trap of gov't benefits and it's sure worth it to me :)

My weekend shower has an average length of 45 minutes.

Most of it spent just standing there. Arguing with people who can't defend themselves. And shaving.

samesies, buddy. samesies.

truth be told, i get pretty self-conscious about having a job rather than a career. trot's thread about quitting his job opened my eyes to the fact that i'm not the only one around here who's okay with this. it was comforting and netpho felt like even more of a safe space, in a way, despite juliana's flabbergasting snobbery.

my husband is out of the province for the weekend visiting his bestie in the montreal area. i skipped yoga last night, got home and immediately changed into cozies, ordered pizza, garlic bread & diet coke for one, watched a couple eps of once upon a time, texted some people, drank three glasses of a bottle of pinot i've been saving since january and lurked around here and facebook and the jezebel comments section and of course rabbit-holed some old sp on youtube. it was glorious.

i plan on doing the same tonight! pm me all your texting numbers, let's shoot the shit! :cool:

when I think of old people I know e.g. people my parents know or my friends' parents, the people who seem happiest are the ones that still make time to go out and have fun despite being 50 or 60 or whatever. Unless you really love your job, it seems like making your job your life is not a good way to find happiness. For a lot of people, work is just a way to make enough money to do what makes them happy. I think this is ok. Why should anyone be compelled to give up going out with their friends or their s/o and partying just because society says RESPONTHIBILITY?

my grandparents are ~80, and they still go out to eat and drink several times a week with their buddies. granted, they have the money to do so, but they are probably the happiest old people I know.

There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. Even if you love your job and it's very benevolent and you work with people etc etc, it's important to have friends at the very least. There's something you can't get from a job where you get paid to be there and/or work with people, even if you genuinely like them, compared to hanging out with people because you like/love them and share a personal connection. Not that anything is wrong with money or anything.

it is pretty depressing though when everyone your age starts posting shit on facebook like "Fifty Better Things To Do On Friday Night Than Going Out"

and they're always things like "catch up on parks and rec"

like seriously, that is not as much fun as drunken adventure with best friends, stop lying to yourselves.

Can't say I've had too many of those. When I was in my early 20s I had maybe a year of those kinds of things before I got addicted to drugs.

I'm pretty isolated I guess, socially. I work and go to school and stuff, but I don't really do anything with anyone. Maybe once a month at most.

But two years ago I never left my house except for therapy so all things in time I suppose.

yeah it seems like you have made significant progress, right? I mean serious drug addiction is not an easy thing to come back from.

Oh, for sure. I'm lucky I never got caught with anything or for any of the times I ripped people off, so nothing legal ever follows me around.

I'm very fortunate that I came back from that and my other psychological issues. Didn't think it would happen. My mom at one point told me she was planning my funeral and "pre-grieving", not because of the fear of me ODing on drugs but because it seemed a foregone conclusion that I would kill myself.

But anyway, how do you go on drunken adventures if everyone is drunk? Taxi cabs are expensive

I've seen this a few times and maybe they didn't mean it to be but it always seems really smug. Like, "I have kids so I'll wait til they're out of the house to have fun. Oh to be young and irresponsible. "
Meanwhile B and I balance our kid and ourselves pretty well, I think.

I dunno. But then there is the very real fact that many many people don't have the means or resources and access to be able to do anything. So. I dunno.

i'm not going out on drunken adventures anymore because i'm more fiscally responsible. i could have a few drunk weekends and waste money on bars and cabs or i could save up for a fun adventure somewhere else for a few weeks. the fact that i'm very close to someone who is sober has an impact on this as well.

i went out today. me and my bro in law's wife, who's my pal, had a glass of wine, then went to a dumpling joint then i treated us to some gourmet donuts. i spent less than $40.

most tuesday nights i go to yoga, then a cheap vietnamese joint and meet my friend at a hipster gay bar to watch rupaul's drag race and have two glasses of wine. i spend about $30 these nights.

life is good. i don't go out for the sake of going out. i would never take back all of those nights in my 20s spent talking over bands i didn't care about while drinking copious amounts of beer or dancing off jagerbombs while on the prowl for a stranger to make out with. life was good then. life is good now.

lol, no shame, o/

*\o

different kinds of #yolo amirite

i just ate way too much pizza. somehow i'm going to wish it into being a cure for the common cold

been listening to no alternative today

gonna do some studying for algebra. big test monday.