she just wanted to bang and i was like no because she kind of looked like luiz guzman's sister

i'd have gotten a beej out of that. wait no i wouldnt want to get blown by not-luiz guzman

i always wonder what that's like and for what reasons, let me tell you nobody's ever thought about it with me

well my mutual friend does but she doesn't seem to understand how people meet anyway. she was like you gotta meet this girl you'd like her a lot! and i meet her and she's this boozhy westlake brat that's out to bang as many hot guys as she wants and i'm like that's cool man but she's like. not down with the clown.

yeah i'm kind of worried that's what's going on here

but i think it has more to do with she's getting married in summer and bummed about it, and she's bi... so maybe shes trying to live vicariously or something. i dunno

yeah right now she's like OMGZZZZ WHY ISN'T EVERYONE GETTING MARRIED

and there's a list made of eligible people and she's going to hook you all up!!!!

but really anything really can happen. most of it is miserable now and hilarious later.

My friend set me up on a blind date with her co worker. I was really excited because he looked a lot like ll cool j. We decided to just meet at a restaurant. He started asking me all kinds of questions right away.... before we even got our drinks served. One of those questions was if I was into threesomes. I said "no" and he kind of looked down and said "well that might be a problem". I was already in a bad mood that day and not in a mood to play games, so I excused myself to go to the bathroom, went out and got a taxi and left.

if he had been ll cool j would it still have been game over at that point

threesomes are the dealbreaker for him. incredible.

So did you threesome or not, Starla?

in '08 i went to a tiny little rock show at a pizza joint (a member of one band worked there and the owner would let him use it after-hours) and danced and danced. the next day i had a msg on facebook from a guy in a band i didn't know. he said he liked my moves and thought i was cute and asked me on a date.

it was blind for me, but i guess he got a l'il peek.

we ended up buying thai food and seeing the wrestler and dating for 3 months before we decided the whole thing was boring and he lived too far, anyway. but not far enough. we were both strange and funny and that may be why we got along so well but there was nothing romantic there.

i've never been set up with someone by a middle-man.

How do you guys just go on dates? I am so hesitant... I think I generally look better in pictures than in real life so my okcupid profile doesn't have a picture as to not be deceitful (also paranoia). Then dudes did message me and I'm thinking "this guy is desperate who sends a message to someone without a picture?" and then a bunch of others did, and more than half of them had actually commented on something that indicated they read my profile. Then that confirmed in my head that dudes will do anything for sex, no matter what the girl looks like. And then there are the cuter guys and I'm just thinking that they're definitely psychopaths trying to find girls to murder cause they can easily get dates based on their looks alone. Idk how to date while sober I guess.

i just post a dick pic and the hos pour in

I'll have to think about that.

i would never go on a date

Sounds like you have self of steam issues.

lol, wtf is wrong with people?!?!?!

I was always so disinterested in dates I've been in and in the end just look for a quick nut and feel even worse than during. It's so fucking pointless.