View Full Version : This thread isn't about sports


The exploding boy
06-06-2014, 09:22 PM
It just isn't.

Trotskilicious
06-06-2014, 09:30 PM
GO SPURS

Order 66
06-06-2014, 09:34 PM
i want to talk about the timberwolves

fuzzyroes
06-06-2014, 09:35 PM
Go Blue Jays!

sppunk
06-06-2014, 09:44 PM
Pedro Martinez is the greatest pitcher to grace this earth.

Order 66
06-06-2014, 09:47 PM
he either needs to speak the language or go home

Sonic Johnny
06-06-2014, 09:55 PM
<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/o5YL9u8g52I" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Hey why the fuck not

The exploding boy
06-06-2014, 09:59 PM
I hope you all die miserable deaths

The exploding boy
06-06-2014, 10:03 PM
<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/o5YL9u8g52I" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Hey why the fuck not


What the hell, youre not supposed to hold the ball in soccer. What an idiot.

Sonic Johnny
06-06-2014, 10:16 PM
soccer is a shitty boring game that has only one functional purpose and that is to keep the french and italians out of good sports like AFL or basketball

Trotskilicious
06-06-2014, 10:21 PM
achem, i'd like to point out that the spurs have a couple of french guys that are absolutely awesome as well as an italian guy that's pretty good, too.

the french are actually really good at basketball, current european champions and they have probably more nba players than any other european side...i mean spain may have them trumped but it's a near-run thing

The exploding boy
06-06-2014, 10:23 PM
Since when is basketball a good sport? Lets not say crazy shit here.

All due respect to all you basketball fans, what the fuck is wrong with you people?

the list goes

(ice) Hockey
Football/soccer (i may be canadian but i still think it should be called football)


And......well that's where it ends. The other sports are just wishing they were Hockey or Football.

The exploding boy
06-06-2014, 10:28 PM
Is it possible to have an indigestion that causes non stop fairly severe nausea for over 24 hours? Cause its been 19 now. I've been fucking miserable.

Sonic Johnny
06-06-2014, 10:31 PM
Thats just your body punishing you for not liking basketball

Trotskilicious
06-06-2014, 10:31 PM
since fucking always you goddamn canadian bastard

Sonic Johnny
06-06-2014, 10:31 PM
achem, i'd like to point out that the spurs have a couple of french guys that are absolutely awesome as well as an italian guy that's pretty good, too.

the french are actually really good at basketball, current european champions and they have probably more nba players than any other european side...i mean spain may have them trumped but it's a near-run thing

yeah okay, i'll pay that. I just like to be casually racist towards the french is all.

Trotskilicious
06-06-2014, 10:39 PM
i'm a quarter french :mad:

The exploding boy
06-06-2014, 10:44 PM
yeah okay, i'll pay that. I just like to be casually racist towards the french is all.

Don't you say shit about my french "cousins". They're a great people who makes fun of our accents and thinks our expressions are hilarious and generally look down upon us french canadians.

Ok nevermind, say what you want about them. Stupid french. Also they're invading my neighborhood. Go back home so you can stop complaining about how even our bakery bread isn't "real" bread because of some bullshit reasons i forget and stop saying stupid shit like that cheddar is not "real cheese".

The exploding boy
06-06-2014, 10:51 PM
Its a fucking british cheese, it's still cheese. We wouldnt have had to eat cheddar if your stupid country bothered about nouvelle france but NO, you let the british have it, so shut the fuck up and eat that fucking cheddar. Just cause its not soft and doesn't have a crust.... And don't be so high and mighty about cheeses anyway, Laughing Cow is from FRance...and it's processed.

And they dont even fucking eat PB. And once i was having some oatmeal and an ex french roommate said "oh i don't eat horse food". Maybe not but you make apple compote with apples that had been put to soak in water in the nasty kitchen sink you didn't even wash beforehand and then you didn't even peel them and then you asked me if i wanted some when it was done. I don't fucking think so. I know what's been going into this sink. Dirty french.

Mooney
06-06-2014, 10:54 PM
<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/o5YL9u8g52I" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Hey why the fuck not

is this a highlight of an actual amazing goal, or were you being sarcastic and i'm an idiot and it is actually a hilariously bad goal? the guy just ran with a ball in his hands then punted it between two poles that were completely undefended. you lost me.

Trotskilicious
06-06-2014, 10:58 PM
ugh god hockey fans are such dipshits

Sonic Johnny
06-06-2014, 11:04 PM
The kick itself isn't that impressive, it's the run that makes it great, the way he fakes out two opponents and just turns on the sprint to get himself enough room to get a kick off. Heaps of the hard work in AFL is about clearing and finding space to set up a shot:

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/Y6NSN8aYxx8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

Elphenor
06-06-2014, 11:53 PM
What the fuck sport is that?

Elphenor
06-06-2014, 11:54 PM
I wish other countries played American style football.

It would be cool to see like Spain's star quarterback face off against Tom Brady or some shit.

D.
06-06-2014, 11:55 PM
i laughed really hard at this listicle:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/danieldalton/hashtag-sportsball

The exploding boy
06-06-2014, 11:59 PM
What the fuck sport is that?

Australian football

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:03 AM
It's such a great game, wish we had some other countries to play it with though.

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:04 AM
It actually looks kind of cool

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:05 AM
No helmets or anything. Dude's are just chilling in shorts.

What beasts

The exploding boy
06-07-2014, 12:06 AM
It's such a great game, wish we had some other countries to play it with though.


Yeah and then dominate the sport for like 3 decades until they catch up. It would be only fun to australians.

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:08 AM
No America would fuck Australia up in that sport. I only saw white guys out there


USA USA USA

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:14 AM
There's a reasonable contingent of indigenous/islander players:

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/5oelsD0MNHI" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

there's also one sudanese dude who absolutely rips up

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:15 AM
But yeah I doubt it would take long for the US to get on top.

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:15 AM
honestly your crazy sport looks pretty cool

and no, the us would never be good at this sport all the athletes we'd use for it are playing our version of football already. same with rugby and to some extent soccer too

basically most of america's best athletes under 6-5 are playing american football

our best athletes 6-6 and taller are usually playing basketball

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:19 AM
do you remember darren bennett, perchance?

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:19 AM
It's not really suited to huge beefcake guys like you get in gridiron though, you need something closer to a basketballer physique cause there's a big emphasis on speed and height. So your point stands I guess.

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:20 AM
not all guys are beefcake, honestly from what i see there's several positions that would translate well to that sport, primarily wide reciever

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:20 AM
of course only two guys on an american football team know how to kick

and one of them only does spot kicks

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:21 AM
do you remember darren bennett, perchance?

I don't remember him but he played for East Fremantle at state level which was my neighbourhood growing up! Looks like he had a reasonable run though looking at his wiki page.

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:24 AM
he was an awesome punter in the american game but i dunno if you have the patience to understand what the hell a punter is

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:25 AM
If the USA took the sport seriously they would dominate I think.

But otherwise yeah nobody good would be playing it.
I actually would love to watch a sport like that because there's no goalie. I don't like Soccer or Hockey because it's boring watching shots just get rejected 90% of the time

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:26 AM
I have watched 2 or 3 games of american football and quite enjoyed it. I find it a little slow though (as i find most rugby-style games) but yeah the punter is the bloke who kicks from a set shot right? like sometimes something or other happens and they kick it through for some points instead of going for a touchdown.

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:27 AM
soccer is incredible once you understand its nuance and take joy out of the excitment of the potential or anticipation of a goal. i think primarily americans get bored with the sport is because they don't understand the build up or when the teams are on the attack so they aren't cued to be excited

hockey is pretty stupid to me, it seems really haphazard and completely without tactics

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:27 AM
The NFL must bore the shit out of people who aren't from The USA.
It's like watching Chess compared to these other sports.

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:29 AM
I have watched 2 or 3 games of american football and quite enjoyed it. I find it a little slow though (as i find most rugby-style games) but yeah the punter is the bloke who kicks from a set shot right? like sometimes something or other happens and they kick it through for some points instead of going for a touchdown.

basically the offense has four chances to get the ball ten yards and usually if they try three times and fail, then they turn to the punter which basically kicks the ball to the other team but ideally far enough downfield to make it tactically safer than turning the ball over on the spot after fourth down

bennett actually started a minor trend called the "rugby kick" whereupon they figured out that they could really kick a ball pretty hard down field the AFL style and get it out of bounds avoiding a return...since it's not standard practice they don't use it that much and you see it more in college

bennett's real interesting to me because he learned to kick two different ways basically and was spectacularly good at his late career adoption of the American football punt style

and yeah american football is pretty slow isn't it?

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:30 AM
Also Baseball....

Why do Americans love such slow, complex sports?

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:36 AM
Yeah I much prefer a run-on, non-stop game. In AFL (I think like in soccer too but idfk) they keep the game clock running during throw-ins/stoppages etc and then tack all the extra time that accrues on the end of the last quarter of the game to heighten the suspense, like the last quarter clock runs up and then the players have no idea how much longer they've got before the final siren. I like that. No time-outs either, they have in-game interchange systems so they won't even stop play for an injury unless it's ultra serious.

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:37 AM
yes that timekeeping is from soccer

goals in extra time are just incredible, one of the great moments in sport

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:37 AM
and baseball is not nearly as complex as they pretend it is

The exploding boy
06-07-2014, 12:40 AM
All this is really fucking ironic considering what i titled this thread. WHY DID I EVEN BOTHER?


I think im gonna start discussing my shitting habits, that.s gotta put a nail in this thread.

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:40 AM
What I like about American Football is ot's like this long term tactical tug of war. Even if on a drive you don't make it to the endzone the progress you made matters a lot.

While in other sports it's like every drive is a self contained all or nothing affair

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:41 AM
that's not true of soccer, prolonged pressure and attacking ultimately results in a goal. even if from an uninformed perspective it looks like "all or nothing"

i dunno what other sports have "drives"

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:43 AM
I do enjoy that about it, it seems like a deeply tactical game where small things you do will have ramifications later on, where AFL is much like NBA in that its just a play in one direction and then a play in the other direction more or less.

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:43 AM
In soccer do they put much statistical emphasis on time spent in the forward half?

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:43 AM
Baseball is the weirdest shit ever.
Like who came up with this sport where you spend so much time standing in the same spot.

Bread Regal
06-07-2014, 12:44 AM
more like the forward third.

Bread Regal
06-07-2014, 12:44 AM
Baseball is the weirdest shit ever.
Like who came up with this sport where you spend so much time standing in the same spot.

"gentlemen"

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:45 AM
And hitting a round ball with a round bat it's again really strange and difficult

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:48 AM
In soccer do they put much statistical emphasis on time spent in the forward half?

absolutely, like JB said it's more about the "final third" but yeah all three parts of the pitch are very important. maintaining possession in the middle third is real important because that's where most of the action takes place, and keeping the other team out of your third is obviously important

soccer's tactical depth is simply incredible, to be honest

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:48 AM
And hitting a round ball with a round bat it's again really strange and difficult

well it's derived from cricket which manages to be the only sport more boring than baseball

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:48 AM
The skills required for baseball are strangely specific.

Like the pitcher's job is to be able to throw a ball ludicrously fast into a narrow zone.
And to be an asshole and fake the batter out.
But thats like it.

Sonic Johnny
06-07-2014, 12:49 AM
Baseballs got nothing in the "standing in one place" stakes on Cricket, where you stand in one spot for half of a game that takes 5 days to play at like 7 or so hours of play per day, usually in the middle of summer.

Oh and if you've played one of those 5 days games you need to play another 4 to determine who is the winner.

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:49 AM
And you have to wear a glove because the ball will break your hand.

The fuck is this shit?

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 12:50 AM
unclear, i think it should be outlawed

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 12:53 AM
Baseball is the only sport I just can't play. I would never hit the ball or figure out what to do with the glove.

I played football and basketball in high school

The exploding boy
06-07-2014, 01:18 AM
All sports is the only sport i couldnt play. They all required you to do something physical.

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 01:39 AM
I wasn't really that good and I wasted a lot of time.
Now I play guitar

The exploding boy
06-07-2014, 01:46 AM
Play or make sounds with it.

Cause i've been making sounds with one for 17 years but im not sure if i play.

Elphenor
06-07-2014, 07:42 PM
A little of both.

I can play some knarly solos but I don't know a ton of scales or anything.
I just jack around with the pentatonic scale and just add improvised shit.
I have a pretty great ability to "feel" beats and strum patterns and stuff though.
So I can play just two chords and people are like "Oh shit you're really good".

By people I mean non-musicians

killtrocity
06-07-2014, 09:49 PM
did you see when the sportsman did the thing and got the points? such elegance, such grace

The exploding boy
06-07-2014, 10:06 PM
Yes, his team will surely win the prize thing.

Eulogy
06-07-2014, 10:10 PM
soccer is incredible once you understand its nuance and take joy out of the excitment of the potential or anticipation of a goal. i think primarily americans get bored with the sport is because they don't understand the build up or when the teams are on the attack so they aren't cued to be excited

hockey is pretty stupid to me, it seems really haphazard and completely without tactics

This is insanity. Hockey and soccer are incredibly similar. And if you think hockey is "without tactics" you're just not paying much attention.

I played soccer at a reasonably competitive level, and hockey is really just a condensed, faster version on ice. Which makes it infinitely more exciting to watch. It's also eerily similar to a lot of indoor soccer, which at least in my experience just shrinks the field and adds boards and is a fuckton more fun and stressful to play.

Trotskilicious
06-07-2014, 10:41 PM
did you see when the sportsman did the thing and got the points? such elegance, such grace

much athletic so skill wow

mxzombie
06-07-2014, 11:18 PM
This is insanity. Hockey and soccer are incredibly similar. And if you think hockey is "without tactics" you're just not paying much attention.

I played soccer at a reasonably competitive level, and hockey is really just a condensed, faster version on ice. Which makes it infinitely more exciting to watch. It's also eerily similar to a lot of indoor soccer, which at least in my experience just shrinks the field and adds boards and is a fuckton more fun and stressful to play.

i've always seen hockey in a similar way, but without there being any additional fun or excitement, personally, while watching hockey as a result of the increase in pace. everything seems to develop very quickly and it's hard to follow, but nobody i grew up around cared for hockey, and we all played soccer, so there's my obvious bias.

Trotskilicious
06-08-2014, 03:07 AM
that's probably it

also i am from a place without ice and a local NBA team so basketball

you can't really follow both

Trotskilicious
06-08-2014, 03:08 AM
(it must have tactics i just like making fun of it)

hnibos
06-08-2014, 08:52 AM
It does but it always looks so sloppy and silly.

Trotskilicious
06-08-2014, 01:26 PM
and i'm really over violence in sport

killtrocity
06-08-2014, 07:13 PM
When they fight, though, it's pretty much theatrics and they all know it. Yeah, the aggression is real, they want to fuck each other up, but they can't do it on ice wearing a bunch of armor, and the second someone gets some real leverage, the refs break it up. The most serious injuries are from dirty hits (which carry harsh punishment) and pucks to faces, which is pretty much unintentional and unavoidable

and then after the game they all shake hands and congratulate each other. I really think the nature of the sport (short bursts of ultra high intensity action) makes it hard to curb that aggression in the heat of the moment but it's ultimately of no consequence

Trotskilicious
06-08-2014, 07:32 PM
:nooooo:

yo soy el mejor
06-08-2014, 08:43 PM
<iframe width="560" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/u09s0uz0tEU" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

yo soy el mejor
06-08-2014, 08:43 PM
man, why y'all talking about sports?

The exploding boy
06-08-2014, 09:30 PM
Why did i take a dentist appointment at 11am, that's stupid, i'll probably be up at 10 at earliest. I'm gonna go to the dentist with morning nausea (its a thing i have), without having had time to eat and probably feeling like i need to have a shit. It's gonna be great.

mxzombie
06-08-2014, 09:35 PM
oh wow. 10 o'clock. wow. so early.

mxzombie
06-08-2014, 09:35 PM
this is eulogy fuck

mxzombie
06-08-2014, 09:35 PM
jk it's ******

The exploding boy
06-08-2014, 10:40 PM
Yeah yeah well even when i was holding down a regular job i couldn't do getting up before 11 so i got jobs that were afternoon or evening shifts as much as possible. I basically can't go to bed before 3am. If i have morning jobs i'll get insomnia and then that leads to a lot of mental fun like not sleeping for 4 days and then crazily telling the doctor at the ER that i think i'm having a heart attack and then them reluctantly prescribing me a bit of valium and then spending a week trying to recover during which work is the least of my concerns.

Fuck society for deciding workdays should start at 9. I guess it makes sense when daylight is required for your job (like working outside). Other than that though, fuck this shit.

But more improtantly, fuck my central nervous system.

Trotskilicious
06-08-2014, 10:47 PM
oh wow. 10 o'clock. wow. so early.

much time. amaze.

Shallowed
06-09-2014, 06:36 AM
This thread taught me more about sports than any other that I've read.

Question: Are there any sports where there are more than one balls in play at any time?

Only one I can think of is snooker/pool, if you can call that a sport.

Trotskilicious
06-09-2014, 09:25 AM
pinball!

Trotskilicious
06-09-2014, 10:14 AM
baseball is horrible just avoid it at all costs

pavementtune
06-09-2014, 10:32 AM
I wanted to get a glimpse at that part of American culture or something. Like jesus christ so many people going nuts. And then I was sitting there and thinking if only this was manchester vs. liverpool.

The exploding boy
06-09-2014, 10:42 AM
I went to a baseball game once and it was a very tight and i'm sure entertaining game for those that like it but i could not stay focused for one second. This was one of the last years of the Expos. If not the last. They won too.

This is so far the only pro sport event i've ever been to (no never seen a pro hockey game in person)

D.
06-09-2014, 11:16 AM
I have a sports question!!

So I'm seeing a lot of Washington Senators logo hats lately. Is there a reason for this? I had to Google what the logo meant but apparently this is a team that no longer even exists?

Help!

Trotskilicious
06-09-2014, 11:25 AM
it's the washington nationals, they use the same logo as the twice defunct washington senators and you see the hats all the time probably because they are good now.

I don't know why would that be popular in Kansas City. maybe people are just desperate to like a good team

Trotskilicious
06-09-2014, 11:26 AM
but this seriously happened when they were bad

<img src="http://yourkillinmesmalls.files.wordpress.com/2012/06/zimmerman-natinals002.jpg">

D.
06-09-2014, 11:32 AM
^ :rofl: ^

Yeah we have a lot of bandwagoners here. But hey we beat the Yankees a few times recently!! Aren't they good? Jeter didn't show up to the game yesterday from what I could tell!

Trotskilicious
06-09-2014, 11:33 AM
there's 162 games in a year, beating the yankees a couple times doesn't mean shit

i mean fuck baseball, what a retarded goddamn sport. 162 games a year? WHY DON'T YOU JUST LET A COMPUTER SIMULATE THIS BULLSHIT THAT DOESN'T MATTER

D.
06-09-2014, 11:39 AM
I like baseball games! I'd much rather watch football though.

pavementtune
06-09-2014, 11:50 AM
It's just weird for me. I always hear people talking about Cubs this and Cubs that and sometimes I think it would be nice if I had the slightest idea what they're talking about.

Trotskilicious
06-09-2014, 12:10 PM
it's not