View Full Version : I am afraid


Sonic Johnny
02-20-2013, 02:27 AM
All the time

Toby
02-20-2013, 02:48 AM
Of the dark

slunken
02-20-2013, 02:48 AM
create a multitude of identities on the internet

Shallowed
02-20-2013, 02:55 AM
I'm afraid that there are only two people on the internet, me and someone else pretending to be everyone else.


Edit: Hey redbreegull, nice theory

cocksure
02-20-2013, 03:01 AM
i'm afraid of everyone

Shallowed
02-20-2013, 03:04 AM
I'm not afraid anymore

PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW

Mo
02-20-2013, 03:07 AM
I am actually afraid of the dark, which is kind of annoying. You know, at night.

And heights, which is a bit more reasonable, I guess.

cocksure
02-20-2013, 03:13 AM
I'm not afraid anymore

PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW PEW
let the battle of rock lyrics begin!

slunken
02-20-2013, 03:16 AM
i just want to hold you tight
you always make things right
let's fall in love in tonight

Sonic Johnny
02-20-2013, 04:25 AM
I am actually afraid of the dark, which is kind of annoying. You know, at night.

And heights, which is a bit more reasonable, I guess.

I am shitscared of heights. Even photos of great heights get the anxiety going.

Mo
02-20-2013, 04:27 AM
For some reason I enjoy photographs of heights, as well as high vantage points in video games.

Sonic Johnny
02-20-2013, 04:54 AM
high vantage points in video games don't get me for some reason.

Luke de Spa
02-20-2013, 05:37 AM
All the time

what are you afraid will happen?

is that actually likely?

what if it's not?

Sonic Johnny
02-20-2013, 05:48 AM
Get attacked Cerebrus

Not that likely

We have to revise the possibility that Greek mythology is accurate

Luke de Spa
02-20-2013, 05:57 AM
so you're not actually afraid?

Sonic Johnny
02-20-2013, 07:00 PM
no

duovamp
02-20-2013, 08:00 PM
I too fucking HATE heights.

D.
02-20-2013, 08:06 PM
heights are the worst. dark ain't much better.

reprise85
02-20-2013, 08:20 PM
im cool with heights

pale blue eyes
02-20-2013, 08:27 PM
Heights, too. At the other site I used to work at, there was a pedestrian bridge over a creek connecting the employee parking lot to the hospital. I had to walk across it every fucking day and HATED it. I would hold on to the side like a scared little kid. Once one of the radiologists who knows me saw me coming across and thought there was something wrong with me because I was walking so slowly and holding onto the side. He came running over all freaked out and then figured out what was going on.

Order 66
02-20-2013, 08:31 PM
i sort of grew out of my fear of heights. snakes freak me out still.. not just the sight of them but any rural area i'm afraid of coz its way more likely to run into to em. this is probably because i lived by a bayou as a kid and they'd get into my bedroom

duovamp
02-20-2013, 08:31 PM
Heights, too. At the other site I used to work at, there was a pedestrian bridge over a creek connecting the employee parking lot to the hospital. I had to walk across it every fucking day and HATED it. I would hold on to the side like a scared little kid. Once one of the radiologists who knows me saw me coming across and thought there was something wrong with me because I was walking so slowly and holding onto the side. He came running over all freaked out and then figured out what was going on.

Awww... That's kind of sweet.

vixnix
02-20-2013, 08:45 PM
I love heights, they excite me. I'm frightened of having to make small talk with a group of ladies.

reprise85
02-20-2013, 08:48 PM
yeah snakes are pretty creepy

Shallowed
02-20-2013, 10:28 PM
I'm afraid that people just pretend to like me. It's so much better to know for sure, because if they don't like me, I can just not give a fuck.

Dead Frequency
02-21-2013, 12:05 AM
http://a2.ec-images.myspacecdn.com/images02/71/8699e64839d54f8da86a61f224b0cbac/l.jpg

D.
06-27-2014, 12:20 PM
Saw an advanced showing of the new transformers movie and there's a part POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT



where they are crossing these cables connected to the sears tower and they show ALL of it from an aerial view and my hands were gripped tight and sweaty. It felt like the scene went on forever but it was like maybe 5 mins.

yo soy el mejor
06-27-2014, 12:22 PM
I'm afraid that people just pretend to like me. It's so much better to know for sure, because if they don't like me, I can just not give a fuck.
this is what i am afraid of but actively try to counter the feeling in some way. or at least not let it affect my actions. it's okay to not be liked by everyone! i don't like everyone i meet and i bet they don't lose sleep over it!

The exploding boy
06-27-2014, 12:38 PM
margin

The exploding boy
06-27-2014, 12:39 PM
I'm not that good with heights but its not like a phobia. And it has to be quite a considerable height for me to start feeling queasy about it. Like over 10 floors at least.

I'm afraid of people. Well of having to socialize really, not people.

I'm afraid of not sleeping. I dread going to bed, every night. Mainly because no sleep triggers high anxiety and makes my life pretty much absolutely unbearable. If i haven't slept for a day i'll start thinking i'm gonna die. Two and i'll start thinking i'd prefer being dead. Every single night i go to sleep i entertain the idea i might not fall asleep. But most days i'm fine, but if i have to be up for any reason early the day after ill probably not sleep or at least not well. Because then i'll start thinking I REALLY NEED TO SLEEP which ensures i won't. the worst is the more tired i am, the less i'm bound to sleep.

I frequently fantasize about how nice it would be if humans had a switch and a timer and you'd just turn the switch turned off and you'd sleep without ever having to worry about waking up until the timer woke you.

scottytheoneand
06-27-2014, 12:54 PM
stop it with the down thread margin posts

The exploding boy
06-27-2014, 01:06 PM
Im actually pretty annoyed i keep hitting the margins

Shallowed
06-27-2014, 05:37 PM
stop it with the down thread margin posts

What are you afraid of, huh?

yo soy el mejor
06-27-2014, 06:08 PM
you're afraid, too, man!

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 06:33 PM
i'm afraid of americans

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 06:34 PM
but seriously, spiders. other horrible, horrible bugs like centipedes

i cannot, CANNOT swim in open bodies of water. Lakes, rivers, oceans. Absolutely terrified of whatever's in it. Fuckin snappin turtles, gators, barracudas, sharks

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 06:37 PM
giant squid

Order 66
06-27-2014, 06:38 PM
all i'm really afraid of is cancer. and getting fired

fuzzyroes
06-27-2014, 07:15 PM
I was terrified of everything growing up, now I just kinda numb myself and keep trucking along

redbreegull
06-27-2014, 07:16 PM
i cannot, CANNOT swim in open bodies of water. Lakes, rivers, oceans. Absolutely terrified of whatever's in it. Fuckin snappin turtles, gators, barracudas, sharks

and things which have yet to enter our darkest nightmares...

redbreegull
06-27-2014, 07:31 PM
http://static.ddmcdn.com/gif/goblin-shark-622x363.jpg

Order 66
06-27-2014, 07:35 PM
zion banker shark

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 07:54 PM
all i'm really afraid of is cancer.

it's pretty horrible and you have a 50/50 chance

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 07:55 PM
although they act like if you live long enough you're GOING to get prostate cancer

which i like to call the communist cancer.

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 08:14 PM
it's a david bowie song

Shallowed
06-27-2014, 08:24 PM
I'm afraid that I might be starting my sentences with "I" too much

noyen
06-27-2014, 08:33 PM
megalodon. any sharks. the ocean is generally scary but also amazing like space.
intimacy.

The exploding boy
06-27-2014, 08:34 PM
Yeah cancer. Death in general and illnesses of all kind.

Also growing old, partly because of death but because growing older means less opportunities. I'm mid thirties and pretty much feel like all i can do now is try to salvage the rest of my life and make something half decent of it since the opportunity to make something GOOD of it has come and gone already. I suppose i'd feel different if i'd spent my youth working towards a future, like most people.

noyen
06-27-2014, 08:35 PM
embrace that death shit. looking forward to it myself.

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 08:42 PM
you know after you say intimacy i realize i'm lying to myself if that wasn't my single greatest fear coupled with love and basically anything involving coupling in anyway

honestly at this point it's a serious problem and i'm really fucking weird

noyen
06-27-2014, 08:44 PM
you know after you say intimacy i realize i'm lying to myself if that wasn't my single greatest fear coupled with love and basically anything involving coupling in anyway

honestly at this point it's a serious problem and i'm really fucking weird

its a weird paradox but i think a lot of people are that way. they want love like crazy but are completely terrified by it.

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 08:54 PM
not scared of death

scared of horrible, painful death probably. Early death. But you know like Louis CK was talking about sometimes you're just like Gosh, what if I just died? Wouldn't that be nice?

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 08:55 PM
its a weird paradox but i think a lot of people are that way. they want love like crazy but are completely terrified by it.

there's that yeah but i think most people are more experience with coupling than i am at this stage

The exploding boy
06-27-2014, 09:02 PM
I dread being in a couple before intimacy. Basically i don't feel comfortable in a relationship until it's there. And as a result i try to make it happen as fast as possible. I was once in a 6 months relationship with this girl and she was basically not seeking intimacy and i never got comfortable around her and i knew it was doomed because of that.

the kind that absolutely has to close the door if she's peeing and stuff (i mean after 3 or 4 months if you're not over this, fuck off. I've seen your genitals. i'm aware you use them to piss. what's the problem? I'm not saying i want to LOOK but i'm just saying it shouldn't matter if say i'm in the bath and you want to go). That just weirded me out. Ultimately I felt like i was supposed to pretend to be someone i'm not. I know that's more physical intimacy but yeah. Like i wouldn't have felt comfortable telling her how i really felt about this or that and really she didn't seem like she wanted to know. It's like she wanted to keep "mystery" alive.....forever.... stupid.

In contrast there's absolutely NOTHING i haven't told my gf. Even the shit i thought for sure i'd never ever tell anyone. If she wanted to ruin my reputation (that's a funny thing, like i have any), she could in a heartbeat.

yo soy el mejor
06-27-2014, 09:03 PM
i would do anything for love.

yo soy el mejor
06-27-2014, 09:04 PM
but i won't do that.

noyen
06-27-2014, 09:07 PM
no shame in paying for sex..

noyen
06-27-2014, 09:11 PM
They need love hotels and host/hostess bars in america like they do in Japan where you can hang out and have a pretend girlfriend and fill that void. It's kinda convenient and perfect for lonely people with money.

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 09:27 PM
so you go on your own
and you leave on your own
and you go home
and you cry and you want to die

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 09:28 PM
In contrast there's absolutely NOTHING i haven't told my gf. Even the shit i thought for sure i'd never ever tell anyone. If she wanted to ruin my reputation (that's a funny thing, like i have any), she could in a heartbeat.

well jesus given what you've shared with us, if she hasn't run for the hills you better marry that damn girl because she's a keeper and loves you terribly

yo soy el mejor
06-27-2014, 09:36 PM
so you go on your own
and you leave on your own
and you go home
and you cry and you want to die

if you're wondering why
all the love that you long for eludes you
and people are rude and cruel to you
i'll tell you why
i'll tell you why
i'll tell you why
i'll tell you why
you just haven't earned it yet, baby

reprise85
06-27-2014, 10:24 PM
but i won't do that.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/I%27d_Do_Anything_for_Love_%28But_I_Won%27t_Do_Tha t%29#Perceived_ambiguity_of_.22that.22

when i was growing up i thought "that" was referring to having a threesome with another man for some reason.

reprise85
06-27-2014, 10:26 PM
let's see what am i afraid of...

intimacy of any kind

not sure if i'm more afraid of reality existing or not existing. probably the former. i'm sort of obsessed with this, but it's because of my constant derealization.

basically the intimacy thing and my fundamental lack of trust in anybody on a deep level keeps me emotionally isolated. you could also related the fundamental lack of trust to reality in general i guess.

Trotskilicious
06-27-2014, 10:48 PM
if you're wondering why
all the love that you long for eludes you
and people are rude and cruel to you
i'll tell you why
i'll tell you why
i'll tell you why
i'll tell you why
you just haven't earned it yet, baby

Thats dumb

redbreegull
06-27-2014, 11:26 PM
I'm scared of putting myself outside my comfort zone, never growing as a person or accomplishing anything in my life, growing old and watching everyone I love die around me. I'm also terrified that I have latent racist and sexist beliefs and tendencies even though I love equality and hate prejudice because I so often find myself in disagreement with other liberally minded people on social issues. I'm afraid I'm part of "the problem" because I don't really believe protesting in the street is an effective way to change the way the elite and their institutions behave. I'm also afraid of heights. I'm afraid of getting busted for drugs again but I'm also afraid of a life without mind-altering substances. I'm afraid of never going back to school and also afraid of going back to school. I'm afraid I will never have a career. I'm afraid I will never see all the places I want to see in the world. I'm afraid I will break up with my girlfriend and regret until the day they put me in the ground because I don't believe there is anyone else in the world with a more kindred soul to mine than hers. I'm afraid of being unattractive to females and being unable to have new sexual encounters and romantic relationships in the future. I'm afraid I will never become a better guitar player and I will never find a group of musicians to play with again. I'm afraid of crowds and I'm afraid of being alone for too long. I'm afraid that I play too much GTA V and don't read enough books. I'm afraid of global warming. I'm afraid of being an outcast and the disapproving looks of others. I'm afraid I will never keep my room clean. I'm afraid I will never move out of my parents' apartment. I'm afraid of my parents separating. I'm afraid of my parents staying together. I'm afraid of being afraid of things I haven't thought to be afraid of yet. I'm afraid Billy Corgan will never put out another good album or reconcile with Jimmy Chamberlin. I'm afraid of losing my hair and hearing loss. brb gotta shower

The exploding boy
06-28-2014, 12:42 AM
That has nothing to do with avoiding intimacy like being in a relationship for half a year without sex.
I always close the bathroom door. Pissing and fucking are not the same intimacy for everybody.

I disagree but alright. Well i mean...i think if after months, nevermind years, you can't bear for your partner to see you having a piss, i think and i don't mean to offend, but i think i'd call this having hang-ups. But i suppose everybody has some.

well jesus given what you've shared with us, if she hasn't run for the hills you better marry that damn girl because she's a keeper and loves you terribly

If i believed in marriage i would. She doesn't either (And before someone who's ever read my past posts about it says what about for immigration purposes, well we're common law anyway at this point and common law or married, it's the same thing to immigration) but yes, i don't mean to be sappy but i know i will never find someone like her ever again should anything happen to us or her and wouldn't even try. I just don't see it. I've never met anyone i had more a kinship with and i can't see anyone else understanding me like she does. I think on our like third phone call it was a classic case of "holy shit where have you been all my life" (and suddenly all other past relationships appeared like the clear obvious mistakes they were). I mean our relationship IS hard because of many factors but i think that says a lot that despite this we're still together...

noyen
06-28-2014, 12:55 AM
I'm scared of putting myself outside my comfort zone, never growing as a person or accomplishing anything in my life, growing old and watching everyone I love die around me. I'm also terrified that I have latent racist and sexist beliefs and tendencies even though I love equality and hate prejudice because I so often find myself in disagreement with other liberally minded people on social issues. I'm afraid I'm part of "the problem" because I don't really believe protesting in the street is an effective way to change the way the elite and their institutions behave. I'm also afraid of heights. I'm afraid of getting busted for drugs again but I'm also afraid of a life without mind-altering substances. I'm afraid of never going back to school and also afraid of going back to school. I'm afraid I will never have a career. I'm afraid I will never see all the places I want to see in the world. I'm afraid I will break up with my girlfriend and regret until the day they put me in the ground because I don't believe there is anyone else in the world with a more kindred soul to mine than hers. I'm afraid of being unattractive to females and being unable to have new sexual encounters and romantic relationships in the future. I'm afraid I will never become a better guitar player and I will never find a group of musicians to play with again. I'm afraid of crowds and I'm afraid of being alone for too long. I'm afraid that I play too much GTA V and don't read enough books. I'm afraid of global warming. I'm afraid of being an outcast and the disapproving looks of others. I'm afraid I will never keep my room clean. I'm afraid I will never move out of my parents' apartment. I'm afraid of my parents separating. I'm afraid of my parents staying together. I'm afraid of being afraid of things I haven't thought to be afraid of yet. I'm afraid Billy Corgan will never put out another good album or reconcile with Jimmy Chamberlin. I'm afraid of losing my hair and hearing loss. brb gotta shower

your perception of fear is problematic for me. I see fear in there but I also see shit that doesn't sound like fear and more like.. white people problems.

Future Boy
06-28-2014, 01:17 AM
hes just crazy

vixnix
06-28-2014, 01:43 AM
I fear physical pain and my children and other loved ones being hurt in any way.

null123
06-28-2014, 02:22 AM
I'm scared of

- my parents dying, especially because there is so much regret surrounding those relationships. also I'm afraid there will be bad circumstances surrounding either of their deaths, especially my mom who is a suicidal alcoholic
- my dad getting sicker from his MS
- anything bad happening to my brother
- not finding a job after college that will pay my student loans/not being cut out for my chosen school and discipline/failing my classes this semester
- gaining weight/not losing weight
- not starting a family and regretting it
- being thought of as stupid or ugly
- not reconciling with my grandparents before they die
- not reconciling with God before I die
- being a net negative to society

Thanks for letting me get that off my chest

Trotskilicious
06-28-2014, 03:05 AM
what is god

The exploding boy
06-28-2014, 01:30 PM
- being a net negative to society


Society can bear it. For all its faults. I don't think that should be in anyone's fears. I used to worry about that and then decided it was stupid.

hnibos
06-28-2014, 01:36 PM
Being alone
Getting real sick

hnibos
06-28-2014, 01:50 PM
My parents dying. I'm pretty distant from them but it's comforting that they are there if I really need them. I can't imagine how lonely I feel if they weren't alive.

D.
06-28-2014, 01:51 PM
- Heights
- Being in our house at night with no one else there (rarity but sometimes happens)
- Tight spaces with no easy exit (elevator pods in STL arch come to mind)
- My daughter being kidnapped and, worse than being killed, being used or sold
- Getting killed while my daughter is young and her never "knowing" me
- My daughter making terrible life choices
- Telling my parents I'm bisexual. I mean no I don't have to ever tell them but I have a pretty close relationship with them (mom mostly) and it does slowly eat at me that they don't fully know me.

D.
06-28-2014, 01:53 PM
I'm glad we can have some real threads every once in a while.

mxzombie
06-28-2014, 01:56 PM
My parents dying. I'm pretty distant from them but it's comforting that they are there if I really need them. I can't imagine how lonely I feel if they weren't alive.

same. i am close enough with my parents but hardly ever see them and only speak with them about once a month or so. in retrospect my relationship with them has never been very antagonistic, but nobody within my immediate family (except my older sister) is particularly expressive or demonstrative.

The exploding boy
06-28-2014, 02:29 PM
I really don't see my parents enough nowadays. My dad maybe three times a year, i talk to him more than that but...he'll be 70 next year, who knows how long he has left, i feel like it's way time to have a closer deeper relationship with him. It's not a bad relationship, i just feel it's still a little too...distant and shallow.

I've always been closer to my mom though she's uh..... well she seems to be becoming a little cuckoo. Thats bound to happen when you're about to hit 60 and working three jobs with no hope for a better future in the last fourth of your life. she was also operated for a cancerous ovarian cyst earlier this year. It hadn't spread anywhere else but i know that really shook her. she put off getting operate for it for about two years because she coudltn afford the downtime... (they weren't 100% sure it was a tumor but they had a lot of suspicions and yet she did nothing, she's lucky)

I'm sure her sons being failures at life hasn't helped either mentally either. she lives half the time at my brother's house and he's chronically depressed (despite taking meds)

Shallowed
06-28-2014, 04:39 PM
so you go on your own
and you leave on your own
and you go home
and you cry and you want to die

This was my experience going to a gig at a pub the other night. No one else wanted to come :( I really really like seeing that band live, too.

Aside from the crying bit. I don't know why, but no matter how anxious or sad I get, I can never seem to cry. The last time it happened, I was talking to my girlfriend about how anxious I am all the time and how spending so much time on the internet is like a vice, but it doesn't help and I still feel anxious about everything, and it sometimes makes it worse because I'm avoiding dealing with something. I didn't actually cry, but I was welling up quite heavily and came close. I wanted to cry though.

The last time I really did cry was in 2012 when I was living with my parents and I revealed to them that I quit my greenhouse job that I'd been in for like, three weeks because I felt depressed and working there made it a lot worse. Dad flew into a bit of a rage.

slunken
06-28-2014, 04:44 PM
same. i am close enough with my parents but hardly ever see them and only speak with them about once a month or so. in retrospect my relationship with them has never been very antagonistic, but nobody within my immediate family (except my older sister) is particularly expressive or demonstrative.

this is similar to my family situation as well.

The exploding boy
06-28-2014, 05:25 PM
The last time I really did cry was in 2012 when I was living with my parents and I revealed to them that I quit my greenhouse job that I'd been in for like, three weeks because I felt depressed and working there made it a lot worse. Dad flew into a bit of a rage.

Living with parents past school years is the worst. I faced a similar situation living with my mom in my early 20's, I had to take the worst jobs and i seriously could not do them. I worked in a factory cutting vegetables for the whole work shift (they made frozen meals there...youd' think they'd have had machines to cut vegetables). Not only that, i had to endure abuse from a supervisor for being too slow. Naturally i wasn't gonna go back the following day but i had a real hard time telling my mom and i remember hearing my mom's bf bitching about what the fuck was my problem and all.

I did that for about 3 jobs then, went for a day, never went back (once cleaning highways, once picking raspberries in fields)

slunken
06-28-2014, 05:47 PM
I'm afraid of having to work my entire life

mxzombie
06-28-2014, 06:10 PM
better hope you live past 67

slunken
06-28-2014, 06:22 PM
i'm afraid of never being able to retire as a consequence of working

slunken
06-28-2014, 06:26 PM
the world could end tomorrow and i would be ok w/ that

sort of in the louis ck sentiment - i'm not the sort of person where, if i died tonight, i would regret all of the things i hadn't done. i'm fairly content. not that death would be a blessing, but i wouldn't argue. as long as its not violent or prolonged.

slunken
06-28-2014, 06:26 PM
just chillin'

slunken
06-28-2014, 06:26 PM
ready2die

yo soy el mejor
06-28-2014, 06:49 PM
i'm afraid of getting hit by a car and being maimed for life. i'd rather just die on impact; i hope they're going fast enough.

Future Boy
06-29-2014, 01:02 PM
heights
being restrained/smothered
decapitated by an elevator
never finding contentment with my life
that my parents are getting old and my family as Ive known it my whole life wont be around for much longer
waiting too long and being too old

pavementtune
06-29-2014, 01:03 PM
waiting too long and being too old

for?

Future Boy
06-29-2014, 01:12 PM
kinda ties into the contentment issue, just that when I finally get off my ass itll be too late sort of thing, school mainly

sppunk
06-29-2014, 02:14 PM
- Physically losing my wife when we're traveling. It happened in Paris before we were married and I about lost it.
- My wife or parents being terminally I'll and in pain and me not being able to do anything to calm them.
- Death of those around me, but not myself.

Mayfuck
06-29-2014, 02:28 PM
my dad turns 70 in three years. i'm scared i won't get my shit together by the time i need to start taking care of parents.

The exploding boy
06-29-2014, 03:22 PM
My parents are definitely on their own on that one and they know it. My dad has a decent retirement but my mom's got nothing and its not either of her mentally fucked sons that will be any help. I predict this will likely end in suicide for everyone but my dad. My brother's already made an attempt, my mom told me about 3 years back she considered it. Actually i dont know that i would though, i'm too scared of death.........