i got to high five the chick that was being eaten out by the chick that i was fucking in the ass. maybe the coolest moment of my life.

o/

liar

n00b

i ditched skipgo in austin to do it too

-.-

Fuckin' your mom was my latest sexual experience.

Also I got a girl's phone number yesterday.

She's 3 days older than me.

i got to high five the chick that was being eaten out by the chick that i was fucking in the ass. maybe the coolest moment of my life.

o/

*\o
i wish i was one of those chicks!

Also I got a girl's phone number yesterday.

She's 3 days older than me.

OK pedovamp!

And by 3 days older I clearly mean seven years younger.

*\o
i wish i was one of those chicks!



which one

probs the chick getting eaten out by the one that was gettin it up the pooper

i masturbated last night using my own tears as lubrication

Fuck my best friend Mike after he took off that tight wrestling singlet

oh great, now you're fucking over here now.

see? if that thread had just been closed, this could have been prevented.

absolutely nothing at all.

i had sex

i bet there are some hotties in Morocco

last time for me was the time I mentioned on here.
before that it was a little while too.
I'm not that active.

Fuck my best friend Mike after he took off that tight A singlet

girl/guy?

Latest for me is right now, I got a boner reading this thread.

girl/guy?

i'm sure it was a guy.

shock me, shock me.

wifesex

Those singlets are pretty hot I gotta admit

i had sex

sex! the latest in sexual experiences!

Get yours now before they're all gone!

^ post/av

Got punched in the dick by a dyke.

i fucked a married chick on the floor of the store that she owns.
anyone walking by in the middle of the night could've seen it, we don't even know.

I feel like an old bastard as my sex drive is lagging in comparison to my girlfriend's. Once a day seems good for me but doesn't seem enough for her :/

i got to high five the A that was being eaten out by the A that i was fucking in the ass. maybe the coolest moment of my life.

o/

that is awesome. its like an eiffel tower with a weak support on one side

I feel like an old bastard as my sex drive is lagging in comparison to my girlfriend's. Once a day seems good for me but doesn't seem enough for her :/

hachie machie!

I feel like an old bastard as my sex drive is lagging in comparison to my girlfriend's. Once a day seems good for me but doesn't seem enough for her :/

Man, I wish I had your problems.

that is awesome. its like an eiffel tower with a weak support on one side

why did you edit chick to A?

i fucked a married chick on the floor of the store that she owns.
anyone walking by in the middle of the night could've seen it, we don't even know.

classy

;_;

good lord i need me some sex.

i hear that

Also I got a girl's phone number yesterday.

Called her. We're hanging out Saturday.

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

*cough cough*

Called her. We're hanging out Saturday.


we should go on a double date.

i'm heading up to Pitt this weekend!

whacked it.
thought of <i>you</i>.

Just had a two and a half hour sex marathon. It's been over twenty minutes and my body is still a little jittery.

Did you win?

I hate all of you..

I feel like an old bastard as my sex drive is lagging in comparison to my girlfriend's. Once a day seems good for me but doesn't seem enough for her :/

how are you planning on fixing this problem?

eulogy and i did it last night.

;_;

good lord i need me some sex.

Yeah.

i haven't had sex in years

:'(

years?@!

yes

how many years?

im not tellin'

lots of cool stuff went on last night :cool:

managed to time it so we had great sex the day before el period started. yay.

http://d3gkbha1s7sr56.cloudfront.net/someecards/filestorage/thi_794.jpg



Anyhow, I anticipate some pretty great sex tonight.

My balls were itchy. So I scratched them.

^your life is average

i wanna have sex, too!

shit.

I hate all of you..

.

sickbadthing loves all of you.

how are you planning on fixing this problem?

By banging constantly whether I feel like it or not.

I kissed a girl and i liked it.

OCA, how much younger than you is she?

daddy ate my eyes

i got my d s'ed last night.

woo.

I had a dream about having sex last night, which I woke up in the middle of. I was lying on my arm, which had gone very very numb, so I quickly tried to roll over and masturbate with it, but when I rolled over I caught sight of the bedside clock, which read half past three or something. I was instantly reminded of how much more tired than horny I was, and went back to sleep.

i havent masturbated in like 3 days, taking all these sleeping pills to combat my insominia, and they dont really lend them selfes to masturbation, i have tuesday off though so i'll download some new porn and jerk it at least 3 times to catch up.

i got my d s'ed last night.

woo.

unfortunately, it was from a friend's (ex?)girlfriend - they've been off and on so often that i could never keep up. :(

they've been off and on so often that i could never keep up. :(

Multiple entendre!

i have the option and not taken it.
I want to win my ex back!
I will DO it! Updates to come, Netphoria!

i masturbated today at like 4 o clock.

i woke at 230 cause someone around was using a chain saw and couldnt get back to sleep so i masturbated, took a nap and went to work.

fuck i am too honest with my postings

i have the option and not taken it.
I want to win my ex back!
I will DO it! Updates to come, Netphoria!

Sexy.

I can't help but wonder what Monte will post.

OCA, how much younger than you is she?

We're the same age. I guess I should've believed 'em when they said that a woman's sex drive increases the older they get. That said, she destroyed me last night. She is by far the best shag I've ever enjoyed :smoke:

Did you win?

I won. My opponent appears to be dead.

i got cock-blocked by the RCMP this weekend. i had walked a lovely lady to my house, but i was picked up by the cops for questioning because i was chased by a crazy person with a large knife yelling death threats at a friend and i earlier. i didn't get out of the station until 6a.m. :(

last night. it hurt and i couldn't finish. BOO

You finally lost your virginity. Congratulations!!!

all these years I've been doing it wrong???

The penis isn't supposed to go in the belly button, no.

i got cock-blocked by the RCMP this weekend. i had walked a lovely lady to my house, but i was picked up by the cops for questioning because i was chased by a crazy person with a large knife yelling death threats at a friend and i earlier. i didn't get out of the station until 6a.m. :(

:<saflhktgud>(

I've got my period

What a slut.

Also I got a girl's phone number yesterday.

I've since kissed her cheek on two separate occasions. :3

U hav rly soft lips

I've since kissed her cheek on two separate occasions. :3

The famed pedovamp, who has been seeing this girl for over two weeks has only twice kissed her, and only on the cheek??

You had better be working your way up to something big.

She's older than I am, so I have no clue what I'm doing.

She probably has no idea what she's doing either because of you being younger than her.

Girls know me as a pedo, so when I'm younger than them they are baffled.

It must be a weird venture. Like going bi or something.

You had better be working your way up to something big.


http://images.encyclopediadramatica.com/images/0/09/Wonkasplooge.gif

I had great sex with the girl I fell in love with recently; but I doubt it will work out.
:(

i am having reasonable sex with a girl i fell in love with recently; it didn't look like it was going to work out but it did.
:)

sorry mo. hope all goes well.

I had great sex with the girl I fell in love with recently; but I doubt it will work out.
:(

Who cares?

Edit: Oh, you're in love... never mind.

Well, I do. Duh.

i had anal sex with an exbf. ridiculous.

were you high?

nuh uh

nuh uh

http://www.babble.com/CS/blogs/famecrawler/2009/05/farrah_fawcett-cancer-death-sick.jpg

:<saflhktgud>(

are you sad because i was cockblocked by the cops, or sad because i was chased by a crazy person with a knife? :)

since you were only chased with the knife, and not stabbed with it, I'd say he's referring to the cockblock

since you were only chased with the , and not stabbed with it, I'd say he's referring to the cockblock


hmm, i suppose you are probably right. its for the best, though - she was probably the dumbest girl i've met in my entire life. twenty-five years of being a good, decent guy have gone out the window in the past month. i've caught a case of dirty trampitus. :(

i was just playing halo and i dropped the vibrating controller on my crotch.


i feel like i am a man

since you were only chased with the , and not stabbed with it, I'd say he's referring to the cockblock

Yeah. It sucks really bad that they kept you around til 6am, regardless of the fact that you were gonna get some pussy.

i had sex with my GF in the car for a few hours.

cars are not fun and don't allow for too much maneuverability.

there was blood everywhere

i had anal sex with an exbf. ridiculous.

never understood this. i can't wait to get shit out of my ass, why anyone would want something stuffed back up their ass is beyond me

In most cases it's probably not about the recipient.

never understood this. i can't wait to get shit out of my ass, why anyone would want something stuffed back up their ass is beyond me

daddy issues.

i had anal sex with an exbf. ridiculous.

how hard did he hit it

by "it" i mean your face

i j'd o

uh my friend's girlfriend just left him, because she wants to be with me (so she says)

fuck fuck.

She wants to BE WITH YOU?

Hm.

uh my friend's girlfriend just left him, because she wants to be with me (so she says)

fuck fuck.

post pics and i'll tell you if you should go for it or not.

post pics and i'll tell you if you should go for it or not.

i hope you're joking

She wants to BE WITH YOU?

Hm.

yeah. she's had a crush on me for awhile, and "recently i have not been able to ignore it"

dude bro code. even if she's absurdly hot and wants to use your penis as some kind of permanent holiday resort, you need to tell her you're not keen and that she should still be with your friend. if she says she otherwise, wait 3 weeks and then fuck her senseless.

dude bro code. even if she's absurdly hot and wants to use your penis as some kind of permanent holiday resort, you need to tell her you're not keen and that she should still be with your friend. if she says she otherwise, wait 3 weeks and then fuck her senseless.

yes exactly

I still have my period

http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/period.png

bonnie, you should get the birth control where you only get it once every three months

it's great

i hope you're joking

post pics anyway

so i've been getting very chatty with my ex (the one that netphoria liked) lately. she joked about me coming over for a snuggle tonight (it's winter here). we havent spoken on decent terms or been on good terms since we broke up really. but the last week or so we've been talking a shitload.
bah, fuck you women! this stupid heart (panis) of mine doesn't know what to do anymore.

to keep netphoria updated on my current slutty status: i have 1 x crush which isn't any real option or anything, that would take some work, but i reckon it's on the cards if i tried to make it happen.
1 x most recent ex gf who currently has dibs on my heart and panis, but she lives on the other side of the country and it's made things pretty hard. I am seeing her soon though.
1 x ex before that. who I always had a soft (hard) spot for. when i fell for her i fell pretty damn hard. and she fucking knows it. she toys with me!

fuck this shit!!

i also got to thinking: i'm probably attracted to the crush quite a bit cause she reminds me of the last ex mentioned. bah.

::manhug::

i had sex with my GF in the car for a few hours.

cars are not fun and don't allow for too much maneuverability.

the change of scenery / location adds and extra element of challange that keeps the sex novel.
i once did that shit at a drive-in and felt like a dirty cliche. but the sex was great.

uh my friend's girlfriend just left him, because she wants to be with me (so she says)

fuck fuck.

i honestly find it very very hard to believe that she would let her feelings devlop to this point without any encouragement from you. do you two chat online often or something?
She would need to have some kind of hope to make this choice based purely on her desire to be with you.

I just shoved a raw steak up my ass.

yditw

i banged an ex's younger sister last night, then had a dream (while sleeping next to her) about sleeping with her sister (the ex)


keepin it in the family

I have never had sex in a car, but would like to try. The backseat of my boyfriend's car is huuuge.

Hotel sex is in my future. Woohoo!

i had sex while driving... i worked the pedals and she had the wheel.

i banged an ex's younger sister last night, then had a dream (while sleeping next to her) about sleeping with her sister (the ex)


keepin it in the family

pretty epic.

i had sex while driving... i worked the pedals and she had the wheel.

none of the knee jerk action when you came? you could die for sex

none of the knee jerk action when you came? you could die for sex

we weren't on a crowded freeway. although i had to ask an ex to stop giving me head on the way to vegas because the traffic was heavy and there were kids in the van next to us. kids are boner killers

IDK if it's because of the summer or what but I have been stupidly horny lately.

Can't wait to see my gf on FRIDAY wooooooo.

Sex has been amazing the last few weeks.
The last time I came with so much ferocity that the cum ricocheted off her tits and into her face/mouth/hair.

WAS AN AWESOME SITE TO BEHOLD.

Hotel sex is in my future. Woohoo!

hotel sex is hot

^

i masturbated last night...twice i think

humped a pillow then fell asleep for an hour the other afternoon.

hotel sex is hot

Seriously. When I was in New York last, we barely left the room. The frigid weather contributed, but damn.

Seriously. When I was in New York last, we barely left the room. The frigid weather contributed, but damn.

tell Jeet i said hi

i honestly find it very very hard to believe that she would let her feelings devlop to this point without any encouragement from you. do you two chat online often or something?
She would need to have some kind of hope to make this choice based purely on her desire to be with you.

honestly man, no way. i'm not even kidding. This guy is a great friend of mine.

Matt, I really hope things remain okay with you and your friend. Hopefully he'll be understanding about all of this, that you didn't encourage it and that it was her decision. Things may be rocky for a bit, but hopefully it'll come out okay in the end.

I hope this ruins your friendship and she gives you herpes.

I've since kissed her cheek on two separate occasions. :3

Last night we made out for an hour in the street in front of her house. 3:00-4:00, standing right there in the street. Best night ever.

oh god, duovamp is going soft on us.

oh no! i knew the friend's ex that i was hoping to just take care of drunk once or twice a month (she lives two hours away) was coming home this weekend, but she's home a day early and wants to hang out sober. i knew that it would come to this eventually, but i thought that i would have a few months at least of mostly casual drunk sex. :( what to do? i'm nervous.

get drunk and fuck her?

get drunk and fuck her?

you are wise beyond your years.

I do what I can.

oh no! i knew the friend's ex that i was hoping to just take care of drunk once or twice a month (she lives two hours away) was coming home this weekend, but she's home a day early and wants to hang out sober. i knew that it would come to this eventually, but i thought that i would have a few months at least of mostly casual drunk sex. :( what to do? i'm nervous.

is this the dark haired goddess of years past?

is this the dark haired goddess of years past?

no, but she is dark haired, and kind of sexy. although, she dated one of my best friends off and on for the past four years, and cheated on him hundreds of times, and is a total whore. so i CAN'T date her. i've never led a girl on for sex, and it looks like i am going to have to a bit here, but that's okay because she is a tramp.

ancient picture of her an i (she is on the right):
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v89/Mooney/n1641060009_50862_5457.jpg


well, i just invited her over to share my beer. wish me luck.

remember what I told you and act accordingly sir

Last night we made out for an hour in the street in front of her house. 3:00-4:00, standing right there in the street. Best night ever.

You're capable of more than that.

that girl is so cute

Her jaw is kind of funny. You've had some real cute ones in the past though, Mooney.

no, she isn't

I hope this ruins your friendship and she gives you herpes.

so anyway


i'm just going to ride it out, i think. the fact that she has dated my friend for so long, has meant that I haven't ever thought of her beyond a 'friends' type relationship. Section 217 (1.b) of Bro Law dictates that pastures once tended to by a comrade cannot be sown for one's pleasure.

pretty sure that's an outdated law, just like how in KY it's illegal to appear in a bathing suit on any highway unless escorted by at least two officers or be armed with a club.

when you call her a tramp you are just punishing deviant behavior and reinforcing the societal norm of women NOT having sex until they are married, and then only with their husband. is that really the world youw ant to live in?

pretty sure that's an outdated law, just like how in KY it's illegal to appear in a bathing suit on any highway unless escorted by at least two officers or be armed with a club.

well, if you could live with yourself and be happy while fucking a good friends ex, go for it.

if he doesn't care its not a problem IMO. the real obstacle, i think, is getting over the fact that somebody you know has been all up inside it.

no, but she is dark haired, and kind of sexy. although, she dated one of my best friends off and on for the past four years, and cheated on him hundreds of times, and is a total whore. so i CAN'T date her. i've never led a girl on for sex, and it looks like i am going to have to a bit here, but that's okay because she is a tramp.

ancient picture of her an i (she is on the right):
http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v89/Mooney/n1641060009_50862_5457.jpg


well, i just invited her over to share my beer. wish me luck.i'd hit it

wrap your shit bro

when you call her a tramp you are just punishing deviant behavior and reinforcing the societal norm of women NOT having sex until they are married, and then only with their husband. is that really the world youw ant to live in?

are you bipolar ?

if he doesn't care its not a problem IMO. the real obstacle, i think, is getting over the fact that somebody you know has been all up inside it.

wait, why would he NOT care? he fucking dated her for 3 years, man.

oh, that's right, she left him cos she wants you. nah, leave it alone. or give it to her once and decide if it's worth it. depends on the chick; depends on the friend.

haha your friend must be quite a guy if she left him for you.

lol

Her jaw is kind of funny. You've had some real cute ones in the past though, Mooney.

hahaha what are you doing in this thread mr.?

I thought I'm Hardcore was gay. Isn't he that guy Matt that went to America recently and visited a bunch of people?

so i've been getting very chatty with my ex (the one that netphoria liked) lately. she joked about me coming over for a snuggle tonight (it's winter here). we havent spoken on decent terms or been on good terms since we broke up really. but the last week or so we've been talking a shitload.
bah, fuck you women! this stupid heart (panis) of mine doesn't know what to do anymore.

to keep netphoria updated on my current slutty status: i have 1 x crush which isn't any real option or anything, that would take some work, but i reckon it's on the cards if i tried to make it happen.
1 x most recent ex gf who currently has dibs on my heart and panis, but she lives on the other side of the country and it's made things pretty hard. I am seeing her soon though.
1 x ex before that. who I always had a soft (hard) spot for. when i fell for her i fell pretty damn hard. and she fucking knows it. she toys with me!

fuck this shit!!

are you back in SA?

wait, why would he NOT care? he fucking dated her for 3 years, man.

Dating a friends ex PROBABLY WILL NOT WORK OUT FOR THE BEST.

Dating a friends ex PROBABLY WILL NOT WORK OUT FOR THE BEST.

sloppy seconds. huge. go for it. :banging:

sloppy seconds. huge. go for it. :banging:

i don't see the big deal here. do you exclusively bang virgins?

i don't see the big deal here. do you exclusively bang virgins?

for the record, I have no problem with sloppy seconds. it wasn't sarcasm.

also i believe "sloppy seconds" means banging a chick who just got banged by another dude, not a chick that your friend banged sometime in the past

I thought you were too cool to post from home..

he's posting from my house. naked.

This thread is called "latest sexual experiences" not "possible future sexual experiences"

I thought I'm Hardcore was gay. Isn't he that guy Matt that went to America recently and visited a bunch of people?

yeah. what made you think i was gay?

haha your friend must be quite a guy if she left him for you.

wait, is this in reference to me? :banging:

No, I'm hardcore doesn't hide his (accurate) thoughts about how gossamer sucks, so gossamer turns into an 11-year-old and hurls nonsensical insults at him.

wait, is this in reference to me? :banging:

no

and suck my 11-year-old cock, eulogy.

honestly man, no way. i'm not even kidding. This guy is a great friend of mine.

thats a pretty shit situation then. she must be a nutter.

are you back in SA?

never left! Just relocated dramatically within the borders.

in other news, i would destroy anne hathaway

in other news, i would destroy anne hathaway

First of all, I absolutely hear that.

Second, got head.

About fucking time.

not yet.

no

and suck my 11-year-old cock, eulogy.

:erm:

not yet.

:rofl:

i just had sex on camera for the first time

that must have hurt

Deep impact.

bonnie, you should get the birth control where you only get it once every three months

it's great

great except people get pregnant on it ALL THE TIME

its been a couple days. i have this horrible head cold and all I can manage is to lie there and try not to suffocate on my phlegm. still worked out quite well

you're complaining about a couple of days? jesus christ

i'm hardcore is calling out everyone for everything this evening

something you never ever do, right?

you're complaining about a couple of days? jesus christ

not complaining. stating facts

not complaining. stating facts

FORGIVEN

that must suck for you

:blush:

The whole shebang. Tuesday, Sunday, Monday. She's loud, and I actually love that, which kinda surprised me.

i think everyone knows my latest sexual exp.

Yesterday afternoon before my girlfriend left for work

Last night. We went to see Public Enemies afterwards. It was great.

c'mon, saturday!!! i've never been so horny in my life.

i went from not having sex at all for twenty-two years, to having sex everyday for two years, to a year of zero, and have never been even close to as horny as i am now, getting it every other weekend, or so. damn you, long distance!

Last night. We went to see Public Enemies afterwards. It was great.

the movie, or the sex?

you don't get to say the entire evening as a whole - you must pick one.

Movie was good, sex was great.

i had some sex today. that was fun.

i'm perioding all over myself.

that's lovely

mother always told me be careful of who you love...

sex on mushrooms is confusing

sex on weed is fun

i've grown tired of drunk sex

sex on weed is fun
yes- ive never concentrated on anything to hard in my life

i've grown tired of drunk sex
and yes- it gets tiring and i just want to give up

Had great sex last night, we'll see if it is equally as great tonight.

mother always told me be careful of who you love...

my mother always told me to never believe it when they say they're on the pill.
:erm:

so anyway


i'm just going to ride it out, i think. the fact that she has dated my friend for so long, has meant that I haven't ever thought of her beyond a 'friends' type relationship. Section 217 (1.b) of Bro Law dictates that pastures once tended to by a comrade cannot be sown for one's pleasure.

You're a scholar and a gentleman sir, I would expect nothing less.


Rough situation though. :(