My boyfriend is Vietnamese. His mother has always objected to him dating anyone outside his race. He didn't even tell her he was dating me until after we'd been together for over a year. His dad has known about me a little longer but he's pretty quiet and doesn't care about the race thing, but he won't stand up to the mom. The mom is totally the head of the house and very stubborn. She told my boyfriend's sister that she wouldn't go to her wedding because the sister wouldn't invite 100 more people to the wedding (in vietnamese cultures, the parents don't pay for the wedding - the people getting married do and the sister didn't even know these people).
So my boyfriend and I have been together two years and live together and his mom has been calling him telling him to move back home, that I'm going to cheat on him, white girls are bad, blah blh blah.
It sucks because even though my boyfriend looks past it, if we ever get married, it'll just ALWAYS be like that.
anyone else ever gone through this? having someone hate you that has never even MET you?

kill her.

i have to agree with geo. or at least, fantasize about it. it'll make you feel better. :D

No, because I've never met them. But I'm sure they would, because nobody really likes me.

why does it have to always be like that? if you're nice even when she isn't and you get to know her she'll get over the whole racist thing and be friends. they do it in movies all the time

why does it have to always be like that? if you're nice even when she isn't and you get to know her she'll get over the whole racist thing and be friends. they do it in movies all the time

:rofl:

http://forums.netphoria.org/wwwboard/icons/icon8.gif

find a boyfriend from your own race

maybe it's not that you're white, maybe she just thinks you're a slutty bitch who's trying to trap her son into being a daddy for the kid you had with someone else

well, that's a bit harsh. but it could be true . . .

Note to Eve: it could be how she sees it, doesn't mean it's true.

No, never.

i had a girl choose not to be with me because my mom didn't like her.

no i'm pretty great with parents.

with brena she only has a mom in her life, so i only have to worry about one parent...then again, there's the father issues. :dammit:

my ex almost broke up with me early on because my parents are fundamental christians and he had never met them.

my ex almost broke up with me early on because my parents are fundamental christians and he had never met them.
my parents are fundamental christians and my mom scares pretty much everyone i've dated when she first meets them.

my parents are fundamental christians and my mom scares pretty much everyone i've dated when she first meets them.

we should date

My boyfriend is Vietnamese. His mother has always objected to him dating anyone outside his race. He didn't even tell her he was dating me until after we'd been together for over a year. His dad has known about me a little longer but he's pretty quiet and doesn't care about the race thing, but he won't stand up to the mom. The mom is totally the head of the house and very stubborn. She told my boyfriend's sister that she wouldn't go to her wedding because the sister wouldn't invite 100 more people to the wedding (in vietnamese cultures, the parents don't pay for the wedding - the people getting married do and the sister didn't even know these people).
So my boyfriend and I have been together two years and live together and his mom has been calling him telling him to move back home, that I'm going to cheat on him, white girls are bad, blah blh blah.
It sucks because even though my boyfriend looks past it, if we ever get married, it'll just ALWAYS be like that.
anyone else ever gone through this? having someone hate you that has never even MET you?

his parent's generation of asians (especially the vietmanese) are really, really stubborn when it comes to this thing. it'll be something that never goes away and the only thing you need to be concerned about is your b/f getting cajoled into thinking like them

as for my personal experiences ... i used to have really long hair and dressed like a hippy. i went to a small college town to go to school so of course even going to the grocery store would illicit a few strange looks. so anyway i met a girl down there and met the dad, who wouldn't even shake my hand. long story short he told her to break up with me and she pretty much did

usually if i'm dating somebody to find out she's a daddy's girl, that's pretty much a red flag for me

i bet he has a small penis :rofl:

My boyfriend is Vietnamese. His mother has always objected to him dating anyone outside his race. He didn't even tell her he was dating me until after we'd been together for over a year. His dad has known about me a little longer but he's pretty quiet and doesn't care about the race thing, but he won't stand up to the mom. The mom is totally the head of the house and very stubborn. She told my boyfriend's sister that she wouldn't go to her wedding because the sister wouldn't invite 100 more people to the wedding (in vietnamese cultures, the parents don't pay for the wedding - the people getting married do and the sister didn't even know these people).
So my boyfriend and I have been together two years and live together and his mom has been calling him telling him to move back home, that I'm going to cheat on him, white girls are bad, blah blh blah.
It sucks because even though my boyfriend looks past it, if we ever get married, it'll just ALWAYS be like that.
anyone else ever gone through this? having someone hate you that has never even MET you?


well she's right

My current boyfriend's mom loves me. She's the best. Even though my ex boyfriend and I were together for like a year, I never met his parents. I met his dad like once and I talked to his mom on the phone a few times. His dad lived in town and would come pick him up and take him out to dinner all the time and I'd just wait there at the house. It kind of hurt my feelings that his dad never invited me. Maybe it was just me being paranoid, but I always felt like his family looked down on him dating me because they were pretty rich and I'm not. Oh well.

Anyway, you guys should just say fuck it and go to vegas or something.

Nope... every person i've dated, or even been involved with casually... all their parents have loved me, i have a great charming the parents quality, its fake mostly but works like a charm, eating out of my hands.

anytime i've met anyone's parents, they've always liked me. i've very polite and courteous and whatnot. but the idea of meeting HER is terrifying because it'll just be so awkward. like i said, his dad is fine with me, but the mom is the head of the household. his dad actually bragged to some family friends about me recently and got a deathstare from his mom.
What i think is weird is that she doesn't want her kids dating white people, yet she moved to the United States. And the whole family gets plastic surgery - to look more white. She even wants my bf to get a nose job.

the only time parents hated me was when i dated a mormon.
fuck anyone who tries to limit their children's happiness into some pre conceived notion.

Just the Mormon. His parents absolutely hated me. I took it for seven years and then they finally got their way.

anytime i've met anyone's parents, they've always liked me. i've very polite and courteous and whatnot. but the idea of meeting HER is terrifying because it'll just be so awkward. like i said, his dad is fine with me, but the mom is the head of the household. his dad actually bragged to some family friends about me recently and got a deathstare from his mom.
What i think is weird is that she doesn't want her kids dating white people, yet she moved to the United States. And the whole family gets plastic surgery - to look more white. She even wants my bf to get a nose job.

ok, eve, you're already know enough to make you feel better:

SHE'S A FUCKING PSYCHO!!! The female, asian equivalent to Michael Whacko Jacko. It's not about you, so just be amused by her craziness and move on.

yeah

the girl's old man was a career navy officer and all around right-winger nazi arsehole - and at the time I was a weed-smoking-acid-dropping philosophy student with a penchant for excessive facial hair, rock n roll, and smart-arse back-chat

we had the best hate-hate relationship ... good times

If you just meet them, and be polite - no matter what kitchen implement she tries to maul you with - then it might go well.

Or, she might think you're a "Stubborn White Witch".

ask amy about this. she'll tell you how to ching ching chong with the best of them

I used to go out with a chinese girl and her parents also objected at her going out with us crazy whiteys.

The way she found around that was also that she never let them know (we went out for a year and a half). Like i'd drop her a steet corner away from her place like they do in movies. It became easier once she moved out of her parent's place, naturally. What's kinda funny is i've never went to her place when i was with her but then the christmas after we had split, she invited me over. I mean they didn't object to her having friends that weren't chinese so it was fine. She then realized all this time she could have just said i was a friend. Though i guess it would have been suspicious if i had been there a lot.

I think ultimately there's not much you can do though. But sometimes, with years and years, i guess things can sorta fix themselves on their own. And if the parents are too stubborn and set in their ways, then really it's their problem and i guess you shouldn't really have a care about it. I know i wouldn't.

i have always charmed parents pretty good. my in-laws love me like their, and they are really cool. and every girlfriend i've had, their mom has loved me. i'm a pretty nice guy in person and very polite, so that's probably why.

I guess I don't tend to make good imprssions. I mean, my own mom told my current gf to dump me.

ask amy about this. she'll tell you how to ching ching chong with the best of them

i would, but... who is amy?

i would, but... who is amy?
I went through something like what you're talking about, a couple years ago, this chick named Amy. There's me and Amy. And we're all inseparable, right? Big time in love. Then four months down the road, the idiot gear kicks in, and I ask about the ex-boyfriend, which, as we all know, is a really dumb move. But you know how you don't wanna know, but just have to know - stupid guy bullshit. So, anyway, she starts telling me about him. How they fell in love, how they went out for a couple of yeas, how they lived together, her mother likes me better, blah blah blah blah. And I'm okay. Then she drops the bomb. And the bomb is this: it seems that a couple of times while they were going out, he brought some people to bed with him, "menage a trois," I believe it's called. And this just blows my mind, right? I mean, I am not used to this sorta thing. I was raised Catholic, for God's sake.

So I'm totally weirded out by this, right? So I start blasting her. I mean, I don't know how to deal with what I'm feeling, so I figure the best way is to call her "slut," tell her she was used. I'm out for blood, I really want to hurt this girl. I'm like, "What the fuck is your problem," right? And she's just trying to calmly tell me it was that time, it was that place, and she doesn't feel like she should apologize because she doesn't feel that she's done anything wrong. And I say, "Oh, really?" That's when I look her straight in the eye, tell her it's over. I walk.

It was a mistake. I wasn't disgusted with her, I was afraid. In that moment, I felt small, like I lacked experience, like I'd never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I'm saying? But what I did not get: she didn't care. She wasn't looking for that guy any more. She was looking for me, for the Nimz. But by the time I figured this all out, it was too late. She had moved on. And all I had to show for it was some foolish pride which gave way to regret. She was the girl. I know that now. But I pushed her away. So I spend every day since then chasing Amy. So to speak.

you are obsessed, aren't you?


btw, my bf bought me a ring.

you are obsessed, aren't you?


what are you talking about?

bitch, what you don't know about me could fit in the grand fucking canyon

No, never.
kinda like george... if you could talk to the mothers, and have sex with the daughters...

yeah, parents have broken up relationships with both the girls ive loved. i dont think they hated me as much as they hated the idea of their daughters being with any guy.

parents are really anal with their daughters.

yeah, parents have broken up relationships with both the girls ive loved.

parents are really anal with their daughters.
no, the daughters broke it up

place blame where it's deserved

no, the daughters broke it up

place blame where it's deserved
I concur. He obviously dates weak minded women.

I guess I don't tend to make good imprssions. I mean, my own mom told my current gf to dump me.

Awww, Ariel :(.

How's the roommate situation going, by the way?

My mother-in-law hated me before she met me, she is nice to my face, but I don't think she likes me when I'm not around, but I don't think she doesn't like her daughter either, so I don't loose any sleep over it.

I concur. He obviously dates weak minded women.

oh i still blame the girls, but it doesnt help that their parents are so close-minded.

sometimes situations are too much. the first time it happened i think we were pretty young, but with this situation now i do blame the girl because she is very weak and immature. its a shame though because her parents have her sister controlled too, and her sister is starting to hate her mom.

Awww, Ariel :(.

How's the roommate situation going, by the way?

It's alright, i agree, she really SHOULD dump me.


The roommate's situation's fine. And by that i mean it's still everchanging. 23 different roomates in the 29 months i've been living in montreal. 15 in the 14 months i've been living on the plateau. Blows my mind when i think about it. It's not like they all leave after a month actually most of them stay in average 3 or 4 and it's most of the times NOT the roaches situation. Just at a lot of foreign students that weren't staying here long or people who travel around a lot.

Unless you meant how's the roommate situation with my gf? In which case i'd say, functional.

I went through something like what you're talking about, a couple years ago, this chick named Amy. There's me and Amy. And we're all inseparable, right? Big time in love. Then four months down the road, the idiot gear kicks in, and I ask about the ex-boyfriend, which, as we all know, is a really dumb move. But you know how you don't wanna know, but just have to know - stupid guy bullshit. So, anyway, she starts telling me about him. How they fell in love, how they went out for a couple of yeas, how they lived together, her mother likes me better, blah blah blah blah. And I'm okay. Then she drops the bomb. And the bomb is this: it seems that a couple of times while they were going out, he brought some people to bed with him, "menage a trois," I believe it's called. And this just blows my mind, right? I mean, I am not used to this sorta thing. I was raised Catholic, for God's sake.

So I'm totally weirded out by this, right? So I start blasting her. I mean, I don't know how to deal with what I'm feeling, so I figure the best way is to call her "slut," tell her she was used. I'm out for blood, I really want to hurt this girl. I'm like, "What the fuck is your problem," right? And she's just trying to calmly tell me it was that time, it was that place, and she doesn't feel like she should apologize because she doesn't feel that she's done anything wrong. And I say, "Oh, really?" That's when I look her straight in the eye, tell her it's over. I walk.

It was a mistake. I wasn't disgusted with her, I was afraid. In that moment, I felt small, like I lacked experience, like I'd never be enough for her or something like that, you know what I'm saying? But what I did not get: she didn't care. She wasn't looking for that guy any more. She was looking for me, for the Nimz. But by the time I figured this all out, it was too late. She had moved on. And all I had to show for it was some foolish pride which gave way to regret. She was the girl. I know that now. But I pushed her away. So I spend every day since then chasing Amy. So to speak.
i really hope you ctrl+c/ctrl+v'ed that here...

chasing amy was the worst fucking movie. it didnt help that i already hated every recognizable actor in the movie, but god... terrible. i guess will smith was alright when he was younger, but he sucks these days.

chasing amy was the worst fucking movie. it didnt help that i already hated every recognizable actor in the movie, but god... terrible. i guess will smith was alright when he was younger, but he sucks these days.


You're thinking of Kevin.


Kevin Smith always sucked except for Clerks which is ok. There might have been a time when i felt slightly different but i was obviously stupid. Although even when I didn't realise how bad he was, i still thought Chasing Amy sucked.

It's alright, i agree, she really SHOULD dump me.


The roommate's situation's fine. And by that i mean it's still everchanging. 23 different roomates in the 29 months i've been living in montreal. 15 in the 14 months i've been living on the plateau. Blows my mind when i think about it. It's not like they all leave after a month actually most of them stay in average 3 or 4 and it's most of the times NOT the roaches situation. Just at a lot of foreign students that weren't staying here long or people who travel around a lot.

Unless you meant how's the roommate situation with my gf? In which case i'd say, functional.

By the way, I still only have your old number from Verdump.

I was gonna give you my current one right here but then i remembered it's netphoria. I'll email it.

You're thinking of Kevin.


Kevin Smith always sucked except for Clerks which is ok. There might have been a time when i felt slightly different but i was obviously stupid. Although even when I didn't realise how bad he was, i still thought Chasing Amy sucked.

However, it would have probably been awesome if Will Smith was in it.

Oh, I could talk on this topic for hours.
Seriously.

I had a bad experience exactly like this.

If it’s any consolation: Initially her mother decided that I would never see or speak to her again, and straight up told her that if she saw me or spoke to me, she’d get kicked out the house.

Now, we’re back together, and her mother loves me.

I don’t know how women work. But yeah, it was a strange jump from one extreme to the other.


I could share details, but that would be boring.

what are you talking about?

bitch, what you don't know about me could fit in the grand fucking canyon

I know you want to have Silent Bobs babies.
And they’d be big enough to full up the Grand Canyon.

i think everyone hates me. i don't think any of them actually have, until after breaking up or something.. i'm just really awkward around parents, i never know what to say and i feel like they're judging me every second i'm around them. erm.

yeah no offense mirrar but my parents would probably be freaked out by you

most of my friends' parents hated me in highschool.