The structure of the mind
Scientology holds that the human mind consists of two parts: the "analytical mind" and the "reactive mind". Hubbard described the analytical mind as the positive, rational, computing portion, while the "reactive mind" operates on a stimulus-response basis based on pain. Scientologists believe that the reactive mind has a malignant effect, causing irrational behavior and creating individual weaknesses as well as undermining efforts to create lasting, prosperous and sane societies. Past painful incidents are seen as acting as templates for future actions and events, which are often acted out with destructive results. The "analytical mind" and the "reactive mind" have been compared to Freud's superego and id, respectively, although the functionality is not the same. Scientologists worship the eternal monkey Vikaka who currently is trapped in an active volcano surrounded by intergalactic lizards with lasers.


oh, wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Scientology) you silly sausage.

umm... timb i hate to break this to you but that's actually true

fo' real!?

i don't believe you! (http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=vikaka+%2B+scientology&btnG=Search&****=)

Originally posted by TIMb
i don't believe you! (http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&q=vikaka+%2B+scientology&btnG=Search&****=)

damnit

In Scientology doctrine, Xenu is a galactic ruler who, 75 million years ago, brought billions of people to Earth, stacked them around volcanoes and blew them up with hydrogen bombs. Their souls then clustered together and stuck to the bodies of the living, and continue to cause people problems today. These events are known to Scientologists as "Incident II", and the traumatic memories associated with them as The Wall of Fire or the R6 implant. The story of Xenu is part of a much wider range of Scientology beliefs in extraterrestrial civilizations and alien interventions in Earthly events, collectively described as space opera by L. Ron Hubbard, the founder of Scientology.

seriously. somebody must have 'hacked' the wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Xenu) page. surely!?!?! who buys into this shit!? besides tom cruise, obviously :erm

the space planes're pretty cool.

<img src="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/b/b8/Xenu-space-plane-2.jpg/30***-Xenu-space-plane-2.jpg">



















:erm

Geoffrey Filbert, a Free Zone (non-CoS) Scientologist, wrote a book, Excalibur Revisited, in 1982, containing his own version of OT III. This was the first of several versions available in the Free Zone. <b>Some say that a man called Timb, an architect, will come down from the stars and bless us all with seff effricken accents. Is this true? We can only wait and see. It is also widely believed by scientologists that gigantic monster chickens gently rotate around the world's axis in perpetual motion, governed by the earth's magnetic pull. They fend off evil spirits, and cannot be seen because they are invisible.</b>

dude! you're making this shit up.

I actually put that on there but someone obviously edited it out immediately.

The "religion" was started by the same guy who wrote Battlefield Earth for Christ sakes. Sadly, the monkey thing actually doesn't sound half crazy when considering the source.

i know. i was discussing it last night with someone.... i've always known it was supposed to be crazy, but i didn't know it was completely fucking nuts.

I know! I'm generally pretty open minded when it comes to hearing about how people choose to worship whoever or whatever but Scientology is just batshit crazy. Even before Tom Cruise became their unofficial spokesperson it seemed way too weird.

Originally posted by pale blue eyes
Even before Tom Cruise became their unofficial spokesperson it seemed way too weird.


that made me chuckle.

Unlike most other religious organizations, the Church of Scientology maintains strict control over the use of its symbols, names and religious texts. It holds copyright and trademark ownership over its "Scientology cross," and the church has taken legal action against individuals and organizations who have quoted short paragraphs of Scientology texts in print or on Web sites, in some cases asserting that their scriptures constitute "trade secrets." Individuals or groups who practice Scientology without formal affiliation with the Church of Scientology have been sued by the Church for violation of copyright and trademark law.

Someone had also mentioned on here that there was a total anti-scientology book brought out a while back, and apparently tons of scientologists have been buying it up so people don't get to see it.

woah. how many scientologists are there? we could make a lot of cash this way.... hey, we could just keep printing the book, and they'll just keep buying it. made for life!

Originally posted by TIMb
woah. how many scientologists are there? we could make a lot of cash this way.... hey, we could just keep printing the book, and they'll just keep buying it. made for life!

I'm going to combat them by buying up domains like www.scientolgy.com and www.sientology.com and forwarding the domains to goatse and tubgirl

i can't believe neither of those are in use!! buy them! NOW!! do it!!

Originally posted by TIMb
woah. how many scientologists are there? we could make a lot of cash this way.... hey, we could just keep printing the book, and they'll just keep buying it. made for life!

Unfortunately, a lot of scientologists are also wealthy celebrities so they could easily collectively outbuy us. Though maybe not John Travolta since from the looks of him he's spending all his movie residuals on Cheetos.

fine. maybe i'll just start my own religion. with my own wealthy celebrities to give me cash.

Having viewed slum clearance projects in most major cities of the world may I state that you have conceived and created in the Johannesburg townships what is probably the most impressive and adequate resettlement activity in existence.

— L. Ron Hubbard, Letter to South African Apartheid Government, 1960